Birds have cages, I'm pretty sure. I see them on Sylvester and Tweetie. Dogs have cages......well at least the one's Michael Vick used to have, I saw them on the news. All the animals at the zoo have cages (at least according to one of the books Mom reads to me, I think I'll probably get to see for real this summer). So to the best of my deductible knowledge........having a cage means you are an animal. So I guess Mom and Dad think I am an animal, because it seems like every time I turn around, they are sticking me in some kind of cage.
First it was that crummy bassinet that I so deftly unloaded on some sucker. Next it's this 'crib' (sounds like cage to me) that they make me sleep in every night. More recently it's this Graco Playard fold and carry thing. Have you seen the website for this thing? Here is a quote from their propoganda (Stalin would be proud):
"A convenient travel bag is also included - just fold the Pack 'n Play® playard, stow it in the bag, and you and your little one are off to see the world."
Off to see the world???? Who are they kidding?? My Mom and Dad have this thing sitting in the living room and every time I so much as close a lid to 'rest my eyes' they try to throw me in this thing. We haven't done any 'world traveling' over here you Graco commies. Look, please don't assume that just because I still spit my food back out into my hand and then smear it all over my face that I am stupid, OK? You aren't fooling me with this new-age cage. I am not fooled by the fact that it doesn't have bars. Your mesh netting is still a weak attempt at trying to keep a baby down (I had to stop the good fight for Neo-awareness, it's become exhausting)
I will not be bound by bars and mesh. In fact, every time I find myself confined to one of these spaces, I pledge to scream at the top of my lungs until either Mom or Dad come and rescue me. So far this plan seems to be working to perfection, although lately after a few minutes of screaming in the 'crib' I fall deeply back into slumber. YAWWWNNNN.......it's getting late, has anyone seen my blanket?
(please note: the only reason I am smiling is because my mom is behind the camera acting like she is about to release me from my cage)
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