Yesterday I celebrated 10 years since receiving my real estate license, and I visited with the person who denied me my first listing. We sat together, watching our sons play one of their last soccer games as high school seniors.
I didn't know Carol when I knocked on her door a decade ago. She just had a FSBO sign in the yard of her modest home. She has one son and twins on the way. Maybe she felt sorry for me or maybe she thought I was bold enough to knock on doors to sell real estate... whatever, her husband called a week later and asked me to come by for a listing appointment.
I took my broker, a genial Southern gentleman of few words.
Carol's husband, Eugene, is a husky guy. And at the time he was managing men at the state docks, interviewing new hires. He asked a lot of questions, most of which I don't remember. But one I do.
"What will you do if you don't get this listing?" he asked.
Did I look that forlorn? That fragile? Suicidal?
All I could say was that I would continue working, selling real estate. Trying.
That question has stuck with me all these years. Losing that first listing was like getting dumped at the prom. Because I didn't know much about sales, competitors, or real estate I did the only thing I knew how to do.
I thanked them for the opportunity. After all, it was my first try.
Over the years, we remained friendly when we saw each other out. Then we ended up living in the same neighborhood, with our children at the same school. We saw each other at parties and I never really thought much about how they didn't give me that listing. They had become more than a lost listing and I became more than a newbie agent.
Carol called a few years back wanting to know the long-term value of adding a bonus room on her home versus installing a swimming pool. I listed and sold the house across the street from them in 5 days.
When Hurricane Ivan hit in 2004, and took down my power for 5 days, Eugene brought over his generator on the second day after power had been restored to their home.
I could have cried.
And I'm sure Carol and Eugene, me and my husband will hold back the tears in a few weeks when our sons play their last soccer game, go to their last prom and walk across that stage diploma in hand.
Handling disappointment with dignity and moving on seemed to be the only path to take after that listing appointment years ago. I've since seen other Realtors try to dissect why they didn't get a listing, putting the seller on the spot. I've heard of other Realtors insinuating a bad outcome when the seller chooses someone else.
I didn't know any other way to take rejection then, but I do now. And moving on with dignity is still the only way to go.
8 Comments on I got knocked down, but I got up again
Time tends to sooften the blow of rejection. I cannot even remember last week these days. The more you swing the better chance for a home run. An agent asked me today if any of the three cleints I shouled today would buy. I believe they will all buy, but you never know. Nice blog. if you want to view my new blog about New Orleans take a look at www.neworleanscondotrends.com.
Really good post. It's often surprising when you work hard preparing for the listing presentation only to see it go to someone else, but you are right . . . it's best to move on with the best of wishes for all parties. Who knows what the future might hold.
There can be so many reasons that the seller chooses to go with someone else, and many of them really have nothing to do with you. I always try to think about this and not take it personally. My philosophy is there is enough business out there for all of us - I don't need to get it all!
Beautifully written! I'll bet in the following years, they gave you many referrals, even if you didn't get that first listing. Plus friendship is much more important than money.
Hi, Janet: I recently heard on the radio about a study on suicide. It mentioned that one of the groups that had one of the LOWEST suicide rate was Realtors! The theory was that because we deal with rejection regularly we could get back up on our feet when we went through hard and depressing times. Makes you think, doesn't it?
There is a reason for everything --- and this life lesson was that you were meant to be long time friends. Congrats for that .... and for being in the business ten years. And, thank you for sharing your story. It was nice to hear about taking the high road and the positive impact it had... on your lives.
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Time tends to sooften the blow of rejection. I cannot even remember last week these days. The more you swing the better chance for a home run. An agent asked me today if any of the three cleints I shouled today would buy. I believe they will all buy, but you never know. Nice blog. if you want to view my new blog about New Orleans take a look at www.neworleanscondotrends.com.