This one is HARD!  This step is a tough one, we ALL struggle with it from time to time.  But we can start to make an improvement by working at it.  But before I get into it in more detail, let me give you all 12 steps again on how to try and improve the problem areas of our lives.

1.  Define your purpose.

2.  Be honest with yourself.

3.  Define your short term goals.

4.  Stay positive and believe in yourself.

5.  Learn new information.

6.  Make different choices.

7.  Take action.

9.  Make new associations

10. Refine - continually try to improve

11. Help others

12. Don't be afraid

Have you ever called yourself FAT,  LAZY, STUPID, SILLY, UNORGANIZED, OLD, DISGUSTING, OR A LOSER?  Well, that's negative self talk!  And we have ALL done it, to some degree or other.  The sad part is, it's so damaging.  We call ourselves names all the time, that if other people said it, we would be really hurt!

Where does this type of thinking come from?  Unfortunately, we were programmed with it by our parents, our teachers, our coaches, our friends, the media!  Think back, has something someone said to you as a child still stick with you?  If you're like most people tha answer is yes.  Well as adults, it is up to us to STOP OUR NEGATIVE SELF TALK AND REPLACE IT WITH MORE HELPFUL THOUGHTS!

Dr. Shad Helmstetter has written a wonderful book on this subject, titled, "WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU TALK TO YOURSELF."  It is an absolute must read if you want to make positive changes in your life.  Dr. Helmstetter believes that ALL faults and failures are a result of our negative programming.  And that we can overcome this programming by acknowledging when we're doing it, stopping ourselves and replacing it with a more positive thought.

Dr. Helmstetter writes that our subconscious mind will go to work on making whatever we tell it a reality.  For example, if I ALWAYS say to myself, "I can't lose weight, I have no will power."  What do you think will happen?  Of course I'll never lose any weight, I KEEP TELLING MYSELF THAT I CAN'T!  Dr. Hemstetter's entire book is a complete dissection of the Henry Ford saying of "WHETHER YOU THINK YOU CAN OR THINK YOU CAN'T , YOU'RE RIGHT!" 

Our subconscious mind DOES NOT KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A POSITIVE THOUGHT OR A NEGATIVE THOUGHT!  It will just go to work on making whatever I'm telling it to, happen.  But that's the GOOD NEWS!  If it doesn't know the difference between positive and negative thoughts, than we just need to give it more positive thoughts!

So, if you would like to lose weight, stop telling yourself that you can't and begin saying things like, "I eat healthier foods everyday." Or, "I have all the will power necessary to lose weight and maintain my good health."  Or even better yet, run out today and buy Dr. Helmstetter's book and get ALL THE POSITIVE SELF TALK for every area of your life!

If you have ever heard BRIAN BUFFINI speak, he will tell you that this book, is the one book that helped him the most on his journey of self improvement!  I agree with Brian 100%, this a great book and I and try to implement it's ideas in my life everyday.  Do I always succeed?  Of course not, we're all human, but I know when I fail and I stop myself, and start right back on the right track!  Like Henry Ford said, "WHETHER YOU THINK YOU CAN OR THINK YOU CAN'T, YOU'RE RIGHT!"  I like to think I can!  All the best until next time!

Kevin