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The Lawyer and the Rancher (Humor)

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Real Estate Agent with Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales 3090099

The Lawyer and the Rancher

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher.

The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher claimed that the bull must have been hit by the train, and wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull.

The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store.

As soon as the rancher showed up, the attorney for the railroad pulled him aside and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking.

After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn’t resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher,

“You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn’t have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn’t have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed you!”

The old rancher replied,

“Well, I’ll tell you, young feller, I was a little worried about winning that case myself, because that darned bull came home this morning …”

Joan Cox
House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Gabe, sure was hoping the rancher was the winner in this case.    Would have liked to see the look on the lawyer's face!   

Aug 24, 2014 12:22 AM
Roy Kelley
Retired - Gaithersburg, MD

Thanks, Gabe, for adding smiles to our faces. Have a most productive week!

Aug 24, 2014 12:47 AM
Noah Seidenberg
Coldwell Banker - Evanston, IL
Chicagoland and Suburbs (800) 858-7917

Love that hook Gabe, thanks.

Aug 24, 2014 01:29 AM
Suzanne Strickler
Realty Mark Associates - Havertown, PA
School is never out for the Successful.

Gabe ~ Good one. I have a friend who's a lawyer who will like this.

Aug 24, 2014 02:12 AM
Than Maynard
Coldwell Banker Heart of Oklahoma - Purcell, OK
Broker - Licensed to List & Sell - 405-990-8862

LOL, typical lawyer...smarter than everyone else!  

Aug 24, 2014 03:53 AM
Lisa Von Domek
Lisa Von Domek Team - Dallas, TX
....Experience Isn't Expensive.... It's Priceless!

Hello Gabe,

Gloating is never the action to take...this funny story is a perfect case in point.  Thanks for the laugh!

Aug 24, 2014 04:48 AM
Nick T Pappas
Assoc. Broker ABR, CRS, SFR, e-Pro, @Homes Realty Group, Broker/Providence Property Mgmnt, LLC Huntsville AL - Huntsville, AL
Madison & Huntsville Alabama Real Estate Resource

Gabe, I'm not trying to upstage you here, but why does New Jersey have all the Toxic Waste dumps and California has all the Lawyers?  Easy...New Jersey got first pick!

Aug 24, 2014 05:04 AM
Tammie White, Broker
Franklin Homes Realty LLC - Franklin, TN
Franklin TN Homes for Sale

Okay, I needed that laugh today. I'm not usually one to read jokes here but this one was great.

Aug 24, 2014 06:11 AM
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Flower Mound, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

Roger D. Mucci - That Roger has quick wit! I can't beat his comments!

Aug 24, 2014 09:04 AM
Jane Chaulklin-Schott
TEAMCONNECT REALTY - (407) 394-9766 - Orlando, FL
TeamConnect Luxury Homes - Orlando, Florida, 32836

Gabe, loved it! Thanks for sending some humor and laughter my way.

Aug 24, 2014 03:41 PM
Harrison K. Long
HomeSmart, Evergreen Realty - Irvine, CA
REALTOR , GRI, Broker associate, Attorney

Gabe ... gotta like the old rancher and big-headed attorney joke.  That's funny.

I am a real estate broker here in CA - and also an attorney - and have heard some good ones over the years.

Aug 24, 2014 04:23 PM
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Pasadena And Southern California 818.516.4393

Hi Gabe -- I guess you can never hear too many attorney jokes especially one with a punch line involving a lot of bull.  

Aug 24, 2014 06:54 PM
Rob Thomas
Prestige Homes of The Tri Cities, Inc. CALL....423-341-6954 - Bristol, TN
Bristol TN-VA & Tri Cities Agent, ABR, GRI, e-Pro

Gabe ....very well said! LOL ...my father in law is a retired attorney ....can't wait to tell him this one ....

Have a great week!

Aug 24, 2014 10:22 PM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Gabe - that is a good laugh.  I love lawyer jokes.

Aug 24, 2014 10:36 PM
Suzanne De Vita
RISMedia
Online Associate Editor

Gabe, there's a lesson to be learned in every joke, isn't there? Thanks for the chuckle this morning!

Aug 25, 2014 12:19 AM
Karen Mathers - REALTOR®
Keller Williams Vero Beach - Vero Beach, FL
When it Matters, Choose Mathers! 772-532-3221

Oh my goodness this is too funny!  I literally laughed out loud!  My Monday is starting out in a joyful way! 

Aug 25, 2014 12:42 AM
William Feela
WHISPERING PINES REALTY - North Branch, MN
Realtor, Whispering Pines Realty 651-674-5999 No.

LOL...You need to get up a bit earlier to beat out an old rancher whenit comes to being cunning.

Aug 25, 2014 09:17 AM
Debbie Reynolds, C21 Platinum Properties
Platinum Properties- (931)771-9070 - Clarksville, TN
The Dedicated Clarksville TN Realtor-(931)320-6730

And it still goes on today in our courtrooms, the bluffing and the strategizing. The guilty walk away because of no witnesses or not enough evidence. I'll get off my soapbox now. :)

Aug 25, 2014 10:27 PM
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

Thank you for stopping by and taking the time to read my humor.

Feb 14, 2016 04:10 AM
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

Your comments are always appreciated!

Feb 14, 2016 04:10 AM