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HILARIOUS HOLIDAY MLS BLOOPERS

By
Real Estate Agent with Sotheby's International Realty BRE # 01362887

 

Well, folks, by all indications, the holiday partying has started. The MLS was full of bloopers this last week, and it seems we have more than a few tipsy agents running loose in the streets. Here are some chuckles as my gift to you for the holidays:

Yule Tid-Bits

"Really sweat deal"  (Oh, I thought the wet circles under your arm pits were a fashion statement.)

"Holiday rice reduction" (So I can't stuff my turkey with beans-n-rice burritos this year?)

"This will impact your buyers." (One of my burritos will alleviate that problem fast.)

"Take shoes before entering." (Shall I take the shoe from the foot that's wedged in your mouth?)

"On hold for horiday" (Thank you Wang Fung.)

"End the year with a bag" (Make mine Prada.)

Egg Nog Nods                                        

"I can get you alone." (True, but only after I've had a few egg nogs.)

"Let's close before 2014" (Are you Rip van Winkle...or  just ripped?)

"Call regarding tim" (Is Tim rich? Forget it – is he breathing?)

"Mess in yard because someone took the pine." (News flash: There's a  Christmas tree in your neighbor's window, dude, and an ax on his porch…)

"Holiday postpronement for flooring" (I'm usually prone and on the floor post-holiday, myself.)

"High-beam ceilings" (I suppose this could come in handy... if there's a deer crossing in your living room.)

Hearth-n-Barf
"Ask about buyer confessions" (That explains the Pope Mobile in the driveway.)

"Make an offre - seller into holiday spirits!" (I suspect you've been knocking back some spirits yourself, sweetie.)

"Seller can get out fat" (Big deal - in Beverly Hills they give free liposuction with every Big Mac.)

"View of Hollywood sin" (I get that every day just cruising down Sunset Boulevard.)

"Good area to infest" (Good selling point...if your clients are locusts.) 
An Extra surprise for Your Stocking:

"Come see my open hose." (Perhaps you should ask Santa for new hose, you naughty little vixen.)

"Leave card for big poin shetias drawing" (I'm laughing so hard I think I shetia-ed my undies.)

That's it for this week, folks. Happy Holidays!   

                       

 

Please follow me on Twitter at https://twitter.com/SherlockofHomes or on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/gwen.banta #HollywoodHillsRealEstate #LosAngelesRealEstate

 

...And be sure to view my California listings at http://www.GwenBanta.com. Thank you! 

 

Comments (34)

Bruce Walter
Keller Williams Realty Lafayette/West Lafayette, Indiana - West Lafayette, IN

Hey Gwen, great holiday list of bloopers!  The Dawgs are on a tear so far this season! 

Dec 09, 2014 11:12 PM
marti garaughty
garaughty.com - Montreal, QC
a highly caffeinated creative type...

garaughty, abstract art, graphic design, WordPress consultant

Dec 10, 2014 01:49 AM
Broker Patty Da Silva Da Silva
Green Realty Properties® - 954-667-7253 - Cooper City, FL
Top Listing Broker

Hahahahahha You never fail Gwen! Thanks for the laughs! Have a great day!

Dec 10, 2014 02:52 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thank you, Sharon. Happy Holidays!

Dec 10, 2014 03:42 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Debbie, that agent couldn't be more clueless!

Dec 10, 2014 03:43 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Bruce, it is SO exciting to see the Dawgs in true form!!! Let's pray they repeat the Cinderella performance Butler is known for. Have a great Christmas and a glorious, blessed New Year!

Dec 10, 2014 03:45 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thank you, Marti - I will share your cookies with Santa.

Dec 10, 2014 03:46 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Patty, my friend - how wonderful to hear from you.  Happy Holidays, and have a wonderful, prosperous, smile-filled New Year!

Dec 10, 2014 03:47 AM
Carla Muss-Jacobs, RETIRED
RETIRED / State License is Inactive - Portland, OR

Funny as usual Gwen.  These are truly hilarious!  

Dec 10, 2014 04:38 AM
Bruce Walter
Keller Williams Realty Lafayette/West Lafayette, Indiana - West Lafayette, IN

Gwen, did you hear that Butler knocked off #5 North Carolina in the basketball classic down in the Bahamas over Thanksgiving?  BTW, I have posted my all time texting blooper on my latest post here on AR!  You may have rights to it if you dare!

Dec 10, 2014 05:08 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Hi Carla - it's great to hear from you. Thanks for reading!

Dec 10, 2014 05:42 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

I did hear, Bruce - that was friggin fantastic! I am just so proud of that team...and the coach! I just commented on your blog. You can't fool me, you rogue!

Dec 10, 2014 05:43 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

I often see shoes piled at the door when I inspect new construction, but to date I have never taken one.  But I am very intrigued about the poin shetias...  Do you have a photo?

Dec 10, 2014 11:06 PM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Jay, when people ask me to remove my shoes, and then they expect me to walk barefoot through the back yard that has been recently watered, I think they are Dumb Shettias  - a common and less colorful variation of the popular Christmas Poin Shettia.

Dec 10, 2014 11:24 PM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Gwen, I need the number of that seller. I've got some fat to get out. Can I do it before my next physical late next week?

Dec 13, 2014 10:57 AM
Anonymous
Craig Nadeau

Paul… She does a lot of proof reading for me too!

Dec 14, 2014 04:11 AM
#30
Craig Nadeau
West Hollywood, CA
Hollywood Hills Specialist

...great fun Gwen!

Dec 14, 2014 04:14 AM
Jill Sackler
Charles Rutenberg Realty Inc. 516-575-7500 - Long Beach, NY
LI South Shore Real Estate - Broker Associate

Love the buyer confessions. They can just fill out the property disclosure instead.

Dec 24, 2014 10:45 PM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-739-3843

Gwen, funny gifts are welcome no matter what the season...I'm a bit late for egg nog, but can nod my noggin in laughter along with the rest of this silly bunch! 

Jan 18, 2015 09:05 AM
Gwen Banta
Sotheby's International Realty - Los Angeles, CA

Thanks for joining in the fun, my dear AR colleagues– it's always wonderful to hear from you all!

Jan 18, 2015 09:28 AM