There was a time when I religiously blogged about many things, and not always real estate related. However, in recent months, I practically dropped out of sight because taking care of my elderly parents became a priority.
Year 2011 was when things started to really go downhill for Mom who was hospitalized 7 times and had 2 surgeries that year. We were elated when she fought and came back with vigor and positive energy.
She and Dad continued to live by themselves since they, especially Dad, valued their independence and their still very active lives. They continued to volunteer at the senior center, and Mom continued to teach line- and folk-dance.
But year 2014, was the worst. Mom fell and was in the hospital and rehab for a month. Dad was diagnosed with dementia. His severe hearing loss didn't help. And he was forced to give up driving his car, which to him signalled his loss of independence.
A Place for Mom and Dad
We finally moved them to the lower unit of our duplex so that we can keep a closer eye on them, and we can be there immediately in case of an emergency.
Here, Mom was truly happy....she indulged in her favorite past time, gardening. And flowers bloomed everywhere. She never met an empty pot she didn't fill. Mom and Dad spent many afternoons at the patio, enjoying the sun and the garden Dad also liked living here because it was a shorter drive to Mastick Senior Center where he played pool five times a week. As Mom likes to joke, "Dad is pooling around."
90th Birthday Parties
We held parties for Dad's 90th birthday, and then again for Mom's 90th birthday a month later. However, Mom frequently told us that she was getting tired, and she felt that she and Dad were "overstaying" in this world. They both have said that it is surprise that they were still alive at their age, especially since they both are the remaining survivors of their respective families.
Sadly, just a month after Mom's 90th birthday, she slowly became weaker and no longer wanted to fight. After a short stint in the hospital, she just wanted to go home and be with Dad. And within 24 hours, she was gone.
The Deepest Sorrow and Pain
I have not known such sorrow, and felt like my heart was being torn apart. Not a single day has gone by when I didn't cry because I miss Mom so much. Watching Dad slowly fade away, as a result of depression and dementia, is truly difficult. I feel like I've already lost them both.
Facing the Future Without Mom and Dad
My parents have always been my biggest supporters and cheerleaders. They were my role models. I always ask my self, "What would Mom and Dad do" in several situations. They --- their guidance, examples, sacrifices ---- will always be my life-long teachers.
Getting My Mojo Back
As I grieve, I seem to have lost energy in doing many things that were second nature to me --- like blogging and answering questions on Active Rain/Trulia. My focus had temporarily shifted from work to taking care of my parents.
But now, I need to get back my mojo and again do things I truly enjoy. That's what Mom and Dad would want me to do.
And this is the first step in a very long and slow climb.....
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