Alert the media, as out of the mist appears the masked Blooper Blogger! Hey friends, I'm back with a list that was too good not to write up. Thanks to
Jane Peters of Los Angeles, Portland's own
Carla Muss-Jacobs, and
Juli Vosmik of Scottsdale for their hilarious contributions:
Mass Confusion
"Has curve appeal" (Is this a house or a Kardashian?)
"A Liz Pendants has been filed" (Who knew you could file a lien on someone's jewelry?)
"Home has been remolded" (So has your cerebral cortex.)
"New combo with all the right stuff" (Welcome to Burger King.)
"Pool and gassy area" (That explains all the bubbles in the deep end…)
"Filled with characters" (You must be referring to the committee in your head.)
Massive Contusion
"House on Double clot" (I suggest you try Xarelto.)
"The house you can boat about" (I've always wanted my own moat.)
"The best in execution" (Hence the wires protruding from the strange wood chair...)
"This is a place of refugee" (Apparently Ellis Island has gone condo.)
"Conjoined storage" (That's what I call the spare tire around my waist.)
"State of the arf sound" (Methinks this house has gone to the dogs.)
Master Collusion
"Neighbors will just disappear" (Back away from the knives, Lizzie Borden..)
"Large screeming room" (Now we know where Lizzie's neighbors went.)
"Short Pat sail." (Bon voyage, ma petite.)
"Knotted architect" (Does he moonlight at Cirque du Soleil?)
"Large footprint in Hollywood Hills" (Everyone comes here hoping to be discovered, right, Sasquatch?)
"Come see this nice peed a terre" (No thanks - I try to avoid yellow snow.)
"Nice front and good behind" (Aw shucks, thank you very much. )
My Last Inclusions
"Nice fat area for expansion" (You mean the space between your ears?)
"You can feel privates here" (Welcome to Cell Block B, Lester Molester.)
That's it for this week, folks. Remember: Spell well and sell.
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