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Back and forth, back and forth - Just Make the Date Already!

Email can be veddy, veddy efficient. Yet... email can also be veddy, veddy ineffient.

I've been trying to get together with a old friend for two weeks now. We have a very close, loving email relationship - but we've rarely talked on the phone ‘cause neither of us seems to be much good at it. We're both introverts and are much more comfy chatting thru our fingertips.

Problem is... we're trying to be oh-so-considerate with each other's time and schedule that we can't seem to get anything down on the calendar! You know what I mean...

Me: "So, are you busy next week? Wanna go get a drink? I'm free Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday."

My friend: "I'd love to see you - let me check my calendar and get back to you." (a few days go by)

My friend: " Sorry it took me so long to get back to you. Tuesday or Friday work for me - how about you?"

Me: "Oops - my Tuesday and Friday are booked. How's your schedule the next week? I'm wide open."

My friend (two days later): "Me, too, just pick a day."

Me: "How about Thursday?"

My friend: "Thursday is good, what time?"

Me: "How about 5:30? Or later - around 6:30?"

My friend: "Either way. Where would you like to meet?"

Me: "Doesn't matter - want me to come your direction?"

My friend: "I don't mind driving your way - whatever works for you."

Me: "Let's meet in your neighborhood - I haven't been there in a while. What's a good place to get a drink?"

Blah blah blah blah blah... this can go on forever, can't it?

So... what I'm learning (yeah, I'm a little slow) is to offer up a date, time and place REAL early in the "conversation."

Instead of all the back and forth, how ‘bout this?

Me: "Hey, are you busy next week? Wanna get a drink Tuesday or Wednesday?"

My friend: "Sounds great! Where should we meet?"

Me: "How about Finnigan's on Tuesday around 5:30?"

DONE.

p.s. this also works REALLY well with clients. Instead of trying to figure out what's convenient for both, just make a proposal. Chances are, it will work for your client and voila! You'll be on the calendar!

Posted by Jennifer Allan, Author of Sell with Soul on 04/13/2008 04:20 PM

Comments (18)

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18 Comments on Back and forth, back and forth - Just Make the Date Already!

This happens to me all the time. It does work better to just state a date.

04/13/2008 04:25 PM

by Chuck Carstensen (Re/max Associates Plus inc)

Yep, it is all about taking control of the situation and then the sale.

Sean Allen

04/13/2008 04:28 PM

by International Financing Solutions

Agreed! One phone call would have handled all of that, with a little luck!

04/13/2008 04:34 PM

by Tony Fantis, Realtor , ABR, Associate Broker - Salt Lake City (RE/MAX Associates - Fantis Group)

lol, i see i see myself and several other people around here

04/13/2008 04:44 PM

by Indigo Financial Group

It goes back to the basics of what we have been taught: give the client a choice of two times. Works much better than just saying lets get together sometime. Usually never happens.

04/13/2008 04:46 PM

by Pam Dent -Charlottesville, Albemarle,VA horse farms, residential, country homes (Real Estate III)

It's todays life style...Always busy and still never get anything done.

04/13/2008 04:52 PM

by William Feela Whispering Pines Realty (Whispering Pines Realty)

Jennifer-This is so true, the email dance can sometimes get out of control when one phone call would handle it all. Good reminder!

04/13/2008 05:00 PM

by Denise Shockey Cocoa Beach Brevard County Real Estate (RE/MAX Elite)

I always try to give times that work for me and provide the "meeting" location with clients. It is harder to get my friends in line however. As busy as we are things sometimes get missed. For example we just open Christmas presents yesterday with some family members who we never got together with. Ho Ho Ho.

Thanks for the post.

04/13/2008 05:49 PM

by Paddy Pizappi PineBush & Hudson Valley NY Real Estate (RJ Smith Realty Real Estate Solutions)

Jennifer, I see what you're saying. It can be so frustration sometimes.

04/13/2008 06:00 PM

by Bob Cumiskey, US Army Retired, Your Sun City Center, Florida ~ Realtor (A 1 Connection Realty, Inc.)

Probably introverted on both sides I agree, but more wishy washy. The dialogue was hurting my head. For God sakes, DO SOMETHING!!

04/13/2008 10:25 PM

by Gary Woltal - REALTOR® Dallas Ft. Worth (Keller Williams Realty)

I've played email and telephone tag back and forth - I think there is room for indecisiveness in BOTH venues. Don't get me started on text messaging!

04/13/2008 11:40 PM

by Ruthmarie Hicks (Keller Williams Realty)

Ruthmarie - LOL - isn't that the truth! The other night I agreed to meet a friend for a drink and it took 6 text messages to get it done.

Gary - I know - it was painful to write!

Bob - What's frustrating is that while I'm trying to nail down one friend/client, I feel as if I can't book anyone else into the spots I'm "holding" open!

Paddy - Merry Christmas!

Denise - I'm so hesitant to pick up the phone, but when I do it, I'm almost always glad I did.

William - SO TRUE!

Pam - good point.

04/14/2008 05:38 AM

by Jennifer Allan, Author of Sell with Soul (Sell with Soul)

Wow, this is soooo me! It does get frustrating after a while, doesn't it? My husband and I do it all the time when trying to figure out where to go to dinner. " Oh I don't care honey, wherever you want to go" back and forth for 20 minutes. I always thought it was a Pisces thing (we are both Pisces) and that we are always just trying to make sure the other is happy.

In business, I try to go out of my way to not do it. I extend my invitations including the whats: lunch/dinner/drinks wheres: my fave sushi/mexican/margs places whens: Weds lunch/Thursday dinner/Friday happy hour. It definitely does make life easier doing it this way.

04/14/2008 09:53 AM

by Nancy Kent, RE/MAX Hill & Valley, Western Mass (RE/MAX Hill & Valley)

I run into this, but mostly with friends. With business, I pretty much always offer up a time right up front.

04/14/2008 10:14 AM

by Joshua and Kathy Schmidt (Coldwell Banker Advantage Realty-Cabot)

Nancy - I'm a Pisces too!

04/14/2008 10:15 AM

by Jennifer Allan, Author of Sell with Soul (Sell with Soul)

Wow - I needed that reminder. I'm trying to set up a few coffee breaks, lunches, etc. and this back and forth is starting to annoy me. So thanks! I'm going to contact those friends on Monday, with a date, time and a place.

05/04/2008 05:52 PM

by Jessica Bigger ~Eureka, CA Real Estate (Ming Tree GMAC Real Estate)

Funny, Jessica, I JUST (like two minutes ago) blogged about this in my SOI journal...

05/04/2008 05:54 PM

by Jennifer Allan, Author of Sell with Soul (Sell with Soul)

No kidding?!!! Law of attraction working as we speak :)

05/04/2008 06:21 PM

by Jessica Bigger ~Eureka, CA Real Estate (Ming Tree GMAC Real Estate)

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