Whether you're a small business owner, motivational speaker, or a hard-working barista at a local coffee shop we are all in the 'people business'. The more people appreciate what we do for them, the more friends, fans, and clients we'll attract. There are hundreds of books, seminars, and on-line tutorials that one can purchase or attend that will give you all sorts of Top 10 ways to influence and affect people. They'll give you lots of how-to's on what to do in sales to close the deal, or they'll tell you exactly what you should be doing to market yourself to a niche audience.
All of these tips and tricks can be somewhat useful if your desire is to simply attract people for the purpose of what they can eventually do for you. Are you a store owner trying to be friendly and inviting so that people will spend money in your establishment or are you a customer service representative who prides themselves in helping others so that you can get that promotion and be recognized by your leaders? Doing good and putting your best foot forward expecting to be rewarded for your efforts is not the way to attract a long-term, loyal, fan base. It may reap some temporary benefits from individuals who appreciated your best efforts in assisting them but do you know what the one thing is that you can consistently do to build a stable of long lasting and rewarding relationships?
It's not a new concept by any means. This one thing has been around for centuries. It used to be a very common practice but in today's world of "what can you do for me" it's become an after thought. So here it is. I'm going to reveal to you the long-since-forgotten number one thing you can do to create a stable of real and loyal friends, fans, and clients; Actually care about people!
I know that might take a second to sink in for some of you. You've been taught for years and learned under the tutelage of high ranking and successful mentors who preach to always be on the look out for an advantage or to constantly be searching for ways to extract something you want from others whether that be their time or money. These people might be successful by economic standards but are below the poverty line by relational standards.
When you meet someone new for the very first time what's the first thing that goes through your mind? Are you immediately thinking of ways to hand them your business card? Do you instantly start to steer the conversation in a direction that allows you to bring up your career and how this person desperately needs your services? To those individuals who look at every encounter as an opportunity to sell themselves I have a suggestion for you. Stop peddling your agenda and start legitimately showing others that you have a care for who they are.
I handed my business card out to a gentleman at the gym a few weeks ago. I've been working out at the same fitness facility for over 10 years. I've seen and spoken to this person more times than I can count. I know all about his wife, his kids, his job, his vacations, and any number of other things in his life but it wasn't until a few weeks ago that he was talking about selling his home. I let him know that I would be more than happy to sit down with him to help out in any way that I could. If he ends up calling me then that's great. If he doesn't and we remain two people who are friendly to one another a few times a week in passing, then that's great too. I don't need someone to use my real estate services in order for me to consider a relationship worthwhile.
When the opportunity presents itself should we be ready to speak about how we can assist someone? Absolutely we should. But that shouldn't be at the forefront of our agenda. When you show people that you care about them you'll be shocked at how big your relational circle will grow. You'll build such a large pool of loyal and lasting relationships that you won't ever have to worry about selling yourself or a product. People will support whatever it is that you do when they know you support whoever it is that they are.
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