Liberty in her Power Box
MRC's thoughts written by: Michelle Carstensen
I was able to see this beautiful site on a cold snowy day in January 2011 on a college credited course trip to the big scary NYC! I say that as a gal growing up in a small rural town in Minnesota with cows and no tall buildings.
For the majority of Americans I would guess going to the Statue of Liberty would be a treat . For me it was *miserable to put it lightly. You see, Up until a few months ago, for 35 years of my life I suffered from something called a PHOBIA for lack of a better term. I spent some miserable days and months of my life with OCD and basically OVER THINKING that I needed to be scared to LIVE. I guess you would call what I thought I had
NECROPHOBIA or
extreme or irrational fear of death or dead bodies.
My thoughts became so invested into over thinking of these thoughts anytime my anxiety was trigger. Thoughts of these kind made me shaky, unable to eat and basically F Everything And Run.
As a child I would cover my head and duck in my car at the sight of a cemetery, in fact any mention of a cemetery.
I got somewhat better as I grew older. That was until a cold August day in 2006 when my grandfather committed suicide. All the terror I faced and thought I had put to rest as a child came storming back with a vengeance into my life at the age of 26.
Through a little bit of help and faith in God, I was able to put my FEAR to rest again.
Earlier this year I took a vacation with my family and again I was faced with irrational fear and uncomfort in a place I was unfamiliar with. I had a great deal of Anxiety again and thought could this be really happening at the age of 35, how could I not have figured this out yet.
Thankfully I came across a Speaker and Coach by the name of Michael Bernoff. On May 2, 2015 my life changed for the better for the rest of my eternal life. He was able to help me see the step I was missing to get past my irrational FEAR.
I am so grateful for my son AJ for pressuring me to take this photo of the Statue of Liberty in January of 2011, when I was 30 years old. You may not understand why things happen or why people feel like they feel "Inside Out" but that day he asked me to promise to take a picture of Freedom for him so he could see it. Even at 8 years old, AJ knew that if he didn't ask me to promise, I wouldn't have taken it.
2015 has been one of the BEST years of my life and to say my Phobia has been cured would not be correct. Because I didn't have a Phobia to begin with, I had 1 irrational thought that escalated from a Peak Emotional Experience and today I stand as I write this in my Power Box, Knowing that the Statute of Liberty stands strong in her Power Box for all of America as well.
* I was scared of th Statue of Liberty because I feared anything that was very old and knowing people died for of freedom and I would circulate that into my mind over and over until I left her presence.
Comments(1)