Thanks so much for all your responses yesterday to my blog entitled "Does arguing with clients sound like a good idea?"

As promised, here's my take.

Our clients are intelligent human beings, capable of making their own decisions. Okay, so maybe some might be more capable than others, but all deserve our respect that they have thought thru their situation (after all, they have more at stake than we do) and reached a decision they feel works for them. That's the first step - to SHOW our clients that we respect their intelligence and their right to make their own decisions. When you immediately "argue" with your client's point of view or decision, this sends the opposite message.

Now, I'm not saying that you shouldn't have an opinion or be allowed to voice one. BUT, if you don't want to be accused of being argumentative, you need to take a different approach from simply saying "Are you sure you want to do that?" or "I really don't advise that" or "I don't think that's a good idea." Say something like that to ME, after I've given MY personal situation some thought and y'know what? I'll dig in my heels and commit even stronger to my position.

You know what else? I think I'm a pretty smart cookie. I'll bet you do, too. In fact, I'll bet most of the people on the planet have a healthy respect for their own intelligence. Argue with me and guess what? I might think you aren't quite as smart as I thought you were - after all - you're arguing with ME and I think I'm right. What does that make you? Wrong... and kinda dumb. "Poor thing, you just don't get it," thinks me.

So, what's the solution? Ah, GLAD YOU ASKED. Because that's part of the solution. Wait for your client to ASK for your opinion or advice. Once they do, they'll actually listen to it. If they don't ask, they truly don't care and any advice you give that is counter to their opinion will be discounted anyway. They're the boss, after all, and if they want to kill their deal, it's their choice. And it IS their choice (not yours)!!!

If you show respect for your client's position and don't argue with it, they probably will, at some point, ask you for your thoughts. At that point, you can give it, respectfully, all the while KEEPING YOUR PAYCHECK out of the conversation or your thoughts.

So, let's take the scenarios presented in yesterday's blog and see how you can respond without arguing:

Scenario #1: Your buyer wants to look for a home in a less desirable neighborhood so she can get more square footage. This is a no-brainer. Show her the houses. Let her do her own soul-searching. YOU can't predict the future anyway, so who knows? Maybe it'll turn out to be a great financial decision, maybe not, but there is NO room for argument here. Last time I checked, adult human beings have the right to live where ever they want, without getting permission from their real estate agent.

Scenario #2: Your seller is offended by a low-ball offer and wants to reject it outright. Obviously, we want the seller to counter any offer he receives, but first, we need to show support and be offended right along with him. He's probably expecting you to argue with him and is steeled for it, so by not arguing right off the bat, he'll relax. Once he does (if he doesn't, you might need to let him sleep on it and re-group the next day), you could offer to draft up an equally ridiculous counterproposal  (full price, 21 day close, whatever) and see if he's open to that. Then maybe you can encourage him to give a little bit so the buyer doesn't feel like a total putz. But again, if he wants your advice, he'll ask for it. If he doesn't ask, he doesn't want it, won't listen to it and will just be annoyed by it.

Scenario #3: Your seller accuses you of underpricing her home when it sells on Day One. Okay, let's imagine what's happening in her life. She's telling all her friends that her house sold in 24 hours and are they congratulating her? Nope. They're telling her that her idiot Realtor underpriced the home. Yipes. Do you defend yourself? This is a tough one because every bone in your body is screaming to. But be careful. Your seller is expecting you to be defensive, so don't be! Agree that the home might have been under market. Congratulate her for having such a nice property and working so hard to get it ready for market. Leave YOUR efforts out of it. If you schmooze her, she'll return the favor. Argue with her and she'll argue back. No fun.

Scenario #4: Your buyer decides to buy a townhouse, but you know that a single family home is a better investment. Another no-brainer. If she's concerned about investment, she'll let you know and you can share your thoughts. But show her the respect she deserves and let her make her own housing decision.

We are in a business where egos and emotions are involved in almost every decision. Acknowledge it, work with it, use it to your advantage. And... GET WHAT YOU WANT!

 www.sellwithsoul.com

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