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Are You Sending Mixed Messages?

By
Real Estate Agent with eXp Realty of California, Inc. CA DRE #01490977

Are You Sending Mixed Messages?

 

We were having breakfast one Saturday morning at our favorite eatery in Carlsbad Village, and I happened to notice this signage.

 

Given the laws here about smoking, it was rather ironic that it was even posted. And then I noticed the mixed message.

 

No smoking sign

 

Thinking back on that, it occurred to me that mixed messages may be something we are sending, perhaps inadvertently, but which cause confusion to those who receive them, create a bad impression, and possibly even send them running in the other direction…certainly not the intent of the message. We've probably all done it, and perhaps not realized it...or do after the fact

 

So how do these mixed signals happen?

 

It could be all the mistakes in your MLS listing which might convey you are not very professional and accurate in representing your client’s property. The same is true of ugly photos. Might these actually convey that you don’t care very much about the property, and client you have a contract with?

 

Showing up late for appointments? Might this imply that, contrary to what you say, you don’t respect being timely, respect other's time?

 

Not returning those phone calls despite your voice mail that says “your call is very important to me” or “I return all calls between __ and __.”

 

Things you say in your emails or text messages, or possibly the tone, that can get misconstrued or misinterpreted by the recipient. You might think you are being clear but your message may say otherwise. Or perhaps what you say makes the recipient feel stupid. Or you sound accusatory without meaning to.

 

Comments you make in your blogging, or on various social media sites, might send a very different and unintentional signal to the world about who you are. Or perhaps that’s REALLY how you are! Think about that for a moment?!

 

Mixed messages often come about when one’s actions, in person or in writing, don’t match what’s being said. And attitude, and tone of voice, can play a major role in conveying a message quite different from what is intended. We’ve all experienced it with lousy customer service, as just one example. Or in a curt voice mail message. Or the way someone answers their phone!

 

The signage at the restaurant was actually rather humorous, both in the mixed message it conveyed, and a noticeable lack of ashtrays, but also as a reminder of how things used to be in public places here years ago where smoking was permitted.

 

Are you, perhaps sending mixed messages to the buying and selling public without realizing it – in person, on the phone, with your blog or website, in your emails and texting, or in your voice mail or message?

Posted by

Jeff Dowler, CRS
Certified Residential Specialist / Realtor®


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Matt Brady
Watermark Capital - Del Mar, CA
One of San Diego's Best Equity Advisors

You mean I cannot be snarky and sarcastic and expect people to know I was attempting humor? Great message!

Jun 24, 2016 12:33 AM
Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Pasadena And Southern California 818.516.4393

Hi Jeff --- I love when the things we see throughout the day inspire thoughts and posts.   A well-deserved gold star.  

Jun 24, 2016 02:29 AM
Gary L. Waters Broker Associate, Bucci Realty
Bucci Realty, Inc. - Melbourne, FL
Eighteen Years Experience in Brevard County

 Jeff Dowler CRS - Your cautionary post should be read by all...mixed messages rarely happen on purpose.

Jun 24, 2016 02:32 AM
Lyn Sims
Schaumburg, IL
Real Estate Broker Retired

Good thing to think about. As for the signs, it also tells me the importance of staying current.

Jun 24, 2016 03:50 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Rene Fabre  - awareness is key!

Nina Hollander  - glad it helped. No doubt you were not the only one!!

Sharon Tara  - Thanks!! I suspect you're right. The top one was for when smoking WAS permitted, then they added the second NO SMOKING.

Raul Rodriguez  - an excellent point for clarification.

Chris Lima  - why thank you, on both counts!

Jeff

Jun 24, 2016 04:17 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Ha ha Matt Brady  Well, you could but you might be taking a chance, until they know you well

Thanks Michael Jacobs  - it's funny how that happens sometimes.

Jeff

Jun 24, 2016 11:08 AM
Andrea Swiedler
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New England Properties - New Milford, CT
Realtor, Southern Litchfield County CT

Jeff, that is a great photo! Talk about mixed messages. You give some very good food for thought here, I think mixed messages are everywhere, and it is a great idea for me to look at my own message system, LOL. Can't hurt!

 

Jun 25, 2016 09:48 PM
Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®
RE/MAX Platinum - Waukesha, WI
Giving Back With Each Home Sold!

Great post!  I can see why Patricia chose to highlight it this week!

Jun 26, 2016 12:52 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH@properties - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Hey, Jeff!  I included this post in today's Last Week's Favorites!

Hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend. 

Jun 26, 2016 01:13 AM
Thomas J. Nelson, REALTOR ® e-Pro CRS RCS-D Vets
Big Block Realty 858.232.8722 - La Jolla, CA
CEO of Vision Drive Realty - Coastal San Diego

Great post Jeff Dowler CRS and nice examples offered of where we need to "watch it". Now, the all too important question unanswered: what is your favorite breakfast place in Carlsbad? I just ate at Al's this past week in between appts; classic diner.

Jun 26, 2016 01:19 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Gary L. Waters, Broker Owner, Waters Realty of Brevard, LLC  - that's an excellent point

Lyn Sims  - indeed it does 

Thanks, Andrea Swiedler  - that's probably true for all of us

Kristin Johnston, Waukesha County Realtor 414-254-6647  - thank you. I appreciate the compliment

Hi Patricia Kennedy  - thanks for the recognition!

Jeff

Jun 26, 2016 01:58 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Hi Thomas J. Nelson, Realtor 

Al's is the classic diner. Can't say I am overly impressed, though. I like Cafe Elysa over on the Coast Road across from the Carlsbad Inn for breakfast - plenty of seating outdoors and good food

Jeff

Jun 26, 2016 02:04 AM
Thomas J. Nelson, REALTOR ® e-Pro CRS RCS-D Vets

Agreed on Al's, it was convenient...and that's about it.


Thanks for the tip on Cafe Elysa, maybe my bride & I will run into you there one day! 

Jun 26, 2016 07:53 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS

We enjoy it alot and often go there on the weekend when we have fanily visiting. I like that it's very close to the beach

Jun 26, 2016 01:21 PM
Hella M. Rothwell, Broker/Realtor®
Carmel by the Sea, CA
Rothwell Realty Inc. CA#01968433 Carmel-by-the-Sea

For that reason, it is important to read over your emails and texts before you send them off. It's amazing how much one gleans about a personality if you don't. Great post.

Jun 26, 2016 03:21 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Hella M. Rothwell, Broker/Realtor® 

I think that's an excellent point, especially when you are writing to someone for the first time. That first impression can make such an impact!

Jeff

Jun 26, 2016 01:23 PM
Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA

That is funny. Great find:) 

Yes, we do send mixed messages all the time in so many different ways...

Jun 26, 2016 06:11 PM
Jeff Stevens
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New Mexico Properties - Las Cruces, NM
Jeff Stevens, Associate Broker/REALTOR

Good post, Jeff. I am a firm believer in the no texts for certain situations. So much gets lost in translation and then you've got a problem. Better to just speak directly in those instances.

Jun 26, 2016 11:19 PM
Sam Shueh
(408) 425-1601 - San Jose, CA
mba, cdpe, reopro, pe

This is more like a contracditory messages.  You can not use the bath room but one needs to go. 

Jun 27, 2016 02:45 AM
Margaret Kapranos
Berkshire Hathaway Home Services - Novato, CA
San Francisco Bay Area REALTOR. 415-608-5070

My least favorite response ever is "I think so".

HMMMM.  All it tells me is 'you think you think' and you know how to string together three words.

Jun 28, 2016 08:35 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Inna Ivchenko 

Thank you. I suspect most of us have sent a mixed message, and probably more than one, without realizing it, whether verbally, in writing, or in our website or blog

Jeff

Jun 28, 2016 08:54 AM
Janice Zaltman
United Realty Group - Boca Raton, FL
Energy Efficient And Eco-Friendly Homes in Florida

Hey Jeff, I am a little confused. You speak about being your word which is important and from my world is all  about integrity and being clear in our communications.  I agree with what you wrote above. Then I see on your site a disclaimer...?  

Jun 29, 2016 10:19 AM