Every real estate agent should subject themselves to one move during their sales career.
Moving is not about the physical relocation of stuff. Moving is more than culling your ocean floor of the broken seashells and dead coral twigs that swirl in underwater tide pools. Moving is more than trapping the loose ends of your life that scurry beneath the furniture and coil up inside the springs, hibernating.
Then humanely releasing those same emotional loose ends back into the wild of your subconscious mind so they can find their way back to your cluttered psyche, like a pet lost and separated by eight hundred miles.
Moving is the repudiation of all the New Age sermons you torment your friends and clients with, that change equates to growth. That change clears the underbrush of our crowded forest lives so new growth can emerge.
That change sets you free. That change allows us the mental space to recalibrate our soul's compass.
The only change I can learn from moving is that we've managed our lives with too many hands attending to the sails and not one finger on the rudder.
Simply put, we've got entirely too much shit. The shit is strangling us. Some of this shit isn't even mine. I'm storing the Life debris of dead relatives, of lost friends, of well-meaning party guests.
I shudder to finally meet Uncle Nat at the Pearly Gates, the same Uncle Nat we drove to Starrett City, Brooklyn in 1986 to claim his bedroom set after he died in his sleep. Driving back to Staten Island as a newlywed in a rented U-Haul with our wooden catch.
"You know I saw you scratch the headboard with that rollerblade."
"I know Uncle Nat. I tried fixing it with putty and Old English polish."
"You can still see the scratch."
"I know Uncle Nat, I know. But now we're both dead. Does it matter?"
So that's the serious side of Moving.
Moving is hysterical. Moving is a pants pisser if you allow yourself the chuckle. You uncover lost photos of your four year old daughter crying at the public pool. The same daughter who calls to cry about a grade now that she's off to college in Rhode Island. I found some poems I wrote in high school.
Inhabit the same space for fifteen years and you molt a hundred different layers of consciousness. The times you fought, the times you cried. The halls you cradled a sick child with a fever. The drawers you hid gifts in. The time I almost blew my hand off with chlorine in a freak accident.
This Move has rewritten Murphy's Law, since we're embarking on the dream renovation of our home. A renovation we've giggled and conspired about for fifteen years. So we're coming back. Last night I found a can of spray paint.
While the neighborhood slept I found the New Age messages that will usher me out of my old home and into my new. Not terribly original but they seemed to fit.
My high schooler bounced into the kitchen this morning, quite alarmed.
"Dad, someone painted our house!"
"I know."
"Who did it?"
"I did."
"Oh, what does Carpe Diem mean? Doesn't ‘diem' have to do with God?"
"That would be' deus'?"
My son and I share an I-Pod account. I've turned him on to Zeppelin, Southside Johnny and AC/DC. He's turned me onto Muse and Def Punk.
"I'll give you a hint - Avenged Sevenfold..."
"SEIZE THE DAY!"
"You got it."
"Cool. Did you see my skateboard?
"Check under Uncle Nat's bed."
Are you thinking of a purchase or sale of Monmouth County real estate? Call Andrew, Broker and Owner of ANDREW J. LENZA REALTY, today at (732) 431-9003 to get you on the path of realizing your Monmouth County real estate goals. Or e-mail me or visit me at my company website.
Andrew J. Lenza, ABR GRI MBA
Broker/Owner
ANDREW J. LENZA REALTY
73 State Highway 34 Colts Neck, NJ 07722
Office Telephone (732) 431-9003
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Oh but, the existential angst of it all. I just rearranged a couple pieces of furniture and found a storage box full of stuff I'd printed off some old Compuserve forums in the 90s.
Andrew- I agree 100% that you need to be on both sides of the desk at least once in our business. We moved last year and it was one of the most dreadful experiences just because well we were disorganized. It could of been soooo much fun...=)
Best,
Scott
My home is a SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLE! Whenever we actually embark on the renovation we've been talking about since we moved in 20 years ago, it will involve a very extensive excavation. It's easy to get lost in the memories. How exciting to be at the start of realizing your dream.
Gotta dig in those memories and find my ".....At Least We Got Shoes." Do I still have a cassette player?
Andrew ~ Reading your too much sh*t line made me think of George Carlins' too much stuff routine. I believe it though; I'm not moving (yet) or renovating, but there are times I'm looking for something and think "what is all this junk?" I am not looking forward to prepping for a move!
Andrew, great post! I hated moving and the only way I'll do it again is in a box. I save a lot of stuff and photos of my closets should be send to Nate Burkis on Oprah with a sign that reads "Help This Poor Woman"! I send my sons off to school every morning and yell out the door Carpe Diem! My 11 year old yells back "Carpe Doom"! Oh well, I try. Good luck with the renovations. I feel a lot of Lenza Angst on the way! Can't wait to hear the stories. Have a great day.
Well Liz must be so excited at the prospect of the renovation.
My hubby wants to move out for a year while we renovate, but I'd rather stay put and just gut it out. I HATE moving. Having to move twice in a year (out and then back). No thanks, I'll take the pain of remodeling while I live here...
Carpe Doom??? I laughed out loud! Good one, Susan.
Andrew, I LOVE the Beatle song that your quote comes from. It says it all, doesn't it? Reframe this remodeling experience mentally as an adventure film. Indiana Lenza and the Temple of...oh, never mind.
I was curious about the nature of your "temporary downsizing." Of course, now we know why those books have new homes. Too much shit. Literary buildup must be managed through the occasional controlled burn. I have no idea what I'm going to do with this antique Q-tip collection and box of twine that just arrived, though. Funny ... no return address.
Boy oh boy are you in for a wild ride! I will enjoy reading about your experience. My husband was a Navy pilot and during that time in our life we had a saying, "Three moves - as good as a fire." Pretty much summed it up. You can imagine the moves back and forth to Europe.
Our final Navy move (not much left by then) saw us move into a 60 year old waterfront home we bought from my parents. Imagine the detritus left in that place . . . The subsequent move from the old place was the easiest. Hurricane Ivan came ashore one day in Sept. '04 and there was, quite literally, nothing left to move. After the initial emotional turmoil (Maybe a year later!) we all had to admit that is was surprisingly liberating to be free of all those possessions.
As my french speaking son says, "Tout est bien qui finit bien!"
Scott, We are lost in our own disorganized sea here, too. Just saw a fin circulating in this heap of junk. Nope! That was a plastic kite. My bad.
Konnie, I wrote the foreclosure graffiti blog myself. That's why I wanted to tackle tagging houses from a happy perspective. What better house than my own?
*** Be back later. The dumpster's hollow mouth awaits, eager for lunch. ***
Elaine, I think I saw it near your 8-track and your husband's Members Only jacket. Yes, we're very stoked to be doing this. The years have brought challenges -- like every other family -- and The Daughter returns next week from Freshman year. It's a full schedule.
Kathy, We never through anything away. I think we convinced ourselves that the walls were made of elastic, like a big Fruit-of-the-Loom waistband, size 54.
Tell me you didn't seriously paint that on the side of your house?!? Your neighbors are going to hate you! Oh wait. You're moving. OK. So the neighbors are still going to hate you, but you won't be around to care :P
Andrew, Paul said it. That was just too cool! You must have had fun doing that to your house. In regards to our shit collecting. I think that you finally get to a point and stop. I periodically go through and get rid of stuff that I haven't used for quite a while. It's like here - let someone else get joy out of and use this shit.
Lisa Hill, What is up with Florida? Do you folks all take Skepticisim 101 in high school? Yes, I spraypainted my house. Shouldn't you be in Dallas right now looking for the man on the grassy knoll?
Only joshing Lisa. Be a good sport ;)
We are coming back. I have great neighbors. They have come to appreciate the eclectic nature of our perspective but my wife still parks on the lawn. Guess it's a Staten Island thing.
Lenza..... We've been in our house since the day our oldest started Kindergarten and he'll hit 30 this year. I dread the day when we have to sift thru all our junk and the kid's accumulations that are still stored here. BTW... Couldn't find the 8-track but have your theme song on vinyl...
Susan, at least your son is learning Latin. (I do like that too Carpe DOOM!) Wait, your guy is 11 and mine is 15. Maybe I should start home-schooling. No, that would make matters worse.
Andrew.....you're video isn't available........but probably not necessary - powerful potent and poignant - I've moved 17 times in my adult life......only twice have I lived in a home for longer then 3 years.......but I've seen people go through turmoil and torment trying to downscale - trying to rid themselves of the material representations of sentimental attachments....once you get through it, its both liberating and transforming..
Nevertheless, having moved as much as I have, it doesn't seem to have diminished the 'crap' I've managed to collect, oh and treasures too.....it seems...I keep taking it with me, each time I think I've purged......I realize I've accumulate replacements......
I was just thinking, what do I do with those 17 snowglobes my daughter collected - each one has a special memory for "ME", but she at 20 has no sentimental attachment to them at all.....hmm... maybe i should take photos of them for myself and then sell then on craigs list......owie
I know what you mean, too much crap. I suffer from that as well. My husband and I are both the same way, we just can't let anything go.
I've moved dozens of times in my life, though never during my time as a Realtor. In fact, now I think I've seen too much of the pain that moving causes(can't remember it myself since the last time I moved was 8 years ago). I don't ever see myself moving ever, ever again. I'd rather suffer through whatever my house is lacking at this point than to put myself through that torture again. But that's me, I've gotten too comfortable...
We moved and our office moved the same week. I whined a lot, and made excuses at each place for not helping more because of the 'other move.' I admit, really lame, after all, it's my house/office! Now I have too much sh_t at both. Carpe Crap and Chuck It.
Dude - I was just about to write a post tonight called "Carpe Diem"! I probably still will. I HATE moving, which I always found ironic considering my choice of profession.
I wholeheartedly agree: we should all move at least once if we're going to have any credibility with our clients when we say, "you'll get through this!" I can relate to my clients so much better now that I'm trying to remodel, then sell, a home filled with CRAP! I think it makes us better in our business lives, and more free in our personal lives when we divest ourselves of the useless junk we accumulate over the years.
I like your prose. Moving is so much easier when you get rid of all the stuff. I think Graffiti is an under appreciated art form but you need to work on your tagging style bruddah.
Melina, Be careful with living within a renovation. Sort of like crashing at Father Damien's house during The Excorist. Is any room truly ever safe? Excuse me while I lurch this pea soup.
Karen, It was either that Beatle lyric or Helter Skelter and where I live, well, that just may prompt a few folks to dial 9-1-1.
Paul, So you received the antique Q-tip collection and box of twine? Let me check my manifest. No, that's entirely wrong. You were supposed to receive the toe nail clipping necklace and the Pee Wee Herman soap dispenser.
Robin, oh God Bless you. I've been searching for a word that just escapes me and here you've left it where I need it -- detritus. Yup, that's the word I was missing. I did find an old Puma sweatsuit underneath the basement steps, back when I was a size 28 waist. Guess I could wear it as a hat now.
ANDREW - I went the other way. I moved so many times, and sold so many houses that I joined the real estate profession. I can listen to that Avenged Sevenfold song everyday and not get sick of it. It's a great way to start the day. By the way, how do you think the new buyers will like your...uh...."welcome gift?"
Andrew- ROFLMAO.... fin circling.... but it's a kite... are you sure you have not seen my garage? I have a two car garage that no car can fit in.... I'm sure I have a kite in here somewhere too.
Simply put, we've got entirely too much shit. The shit is strangling us. Some of this shit isn't even mine. I'm storing the Life debris of dead relatives, of lost friends, of well-meaning party guests.
Well said my friend.... I sold my last place almost 3 years ago and had to go into storage while we built our current house.... what a friggin' nightmare... not to mention staying with my family for 3 months when things weren't done in time.
Let just say I can relate and today I caved and let Al have a yard sale......... ughhhhhhhhhh made almost $300 from stuff i didn't even know I had :)
Andrew, wow, so beautifully put. Do you get sick of me saying that? You really should do a book, ya know? I've been in mine for 15 years too, the longest ever. Don't want to move....too much work. It will be fun to read of your journey in renovating. Have a good marriage? When we built 15 years ago it was a nightmare, never again. If we ever move I will find a nice floor plan and paint and carpet, but not from scratch again.
Andrew, I am so glad you got to the shit part, I wasn't sure I was getting it? I can be slow sometimes? ;) Anyway, my broker says to all of us, we should all move once or twice during our careers so we can remember what we continuously put our clients through. I hope all goes well during your adventure!
Andrew, You're alright, and I mean that as the highest of compliments, one day when I,m bored not selling any real estate i,m going to drive down and pop in on you.
You are the smart guy to leave home before the construction begins. Two years ago, hubby and I decided to get rid of one wall, remove popcorn ceilings, obliterate all wallpaper and have a few rooms of tile installed. It was a freaking nightmare dealing with all of our shit that really isn't shit getting shit all over it. By the time it was all over, we dropped an extra small fortune to have the wet bar expanded just in time for our version of therapy. Never again.
I swear the next time we change light bulbs I am moving out.
most people move for just one reason, so they don't have to clean the house. they leave all their crap, they don't have to clean anything and they move into a new clean place.
Brilliant! I'm trying hard to learn how to stay put. I lived in 27 different places by the time I graduated high school at 17. I have fantasies about stability and often get rid of most of my 'stuff' to clear the way for new experiences. Just like you said :)
I love that song and use that phrase often. It doesn't surprise me to see it on the side of your house.
You have no idea how much I want to spray paint my own house now....
ANDREW, After moving from Colorado to North Carolina and then from North Carolina to Texas the thought of moving just makes my back shudder. I thought every house was the last one and when I finally said "okay God if I have to move I will move" now I've now been able to stay in the same house for 11 years. Prior to this house we moved at least every 5 years.
I wish you lots of luck on the renovation!! It must be major to be totally moving out.
Hello Andrew, I would guess that we will all have lots of months of good reading as you go through the exciting adventure that lies before you and the family. iIagine all the stuff ( my favorite word) you will find and actually be temped to keep ( again). Cassette player? Keep the shoes ( you may need them so you have something to remove when you travel) , Lose the player,lol
Andrew - Moving....I spent the day emptying out my studio.....rearranging everything and trying to figure why I have over 800 paintings piled in different areas. God forbid I would ever have to relocate them. Then there is another winter's batch of stuff. Another heater (you can not believe how many different types of heaters one can accumulate over time.) They remain cobwebbed testimony to it is too damn cold in January to sit out there and try to paint. The first clue is always the water turning to ice when you are attempting to mix watercolors. You move to acylic but it becomes crystallized. Then you attempt oil but it is like sludge. The final shot across the bow is the attempt at soft pastels thwarted by fingers shivering in the cold.
I feel your pain, Andrew. I have lived here over 20 years and I keep everything, you know, I might need it. I have been on a few 'oooh, I need to collect those' binges. It's kind of overwhelming. I, too, am looking forward to the adventures of your renovation project.
AHHHH I am going through this right now but not moving, remodeling. Moving shit from one room to the next while paint is being applied, flooring being installed. Wondering what shit will go back into that room!!!???!!!
My brother always says you need to move every four years to declutter. I think there is some insane truth to that. I think that is why moving is so highly emotional.
Being the crazy person I am ...my first thought is...I hope the next owner was going to change the exterior paint. I'd love to do that on my house. It is right on a corner where everyone could get a good view. Rock on!
Lenza - Considering I've moved over 10 times in about 10 years since moving to Allentown, I hope to stay put...at least a little bit. Owned my current home for a year and a half and actually lived in it over a year before buying it. I've consolidated my 'Shit' to a large extent so I hope to be in fine shape the next time I swap this stability for my next new adventure.
Andrew, when I received my unexpected package in the mail, I had to stop by to see what you've been up to. So interesting to read about your move...you see, we've been de-cluttering too for the past couple of weeks; not for a physical move, but because we wanted to do some major spring cleaning. It feels like moving though... Anyway, Thanks for the book...it was quite appropriate, more than you could imagine.
Good Luck with your remodel. I've been there and done that. It is what you make it, your graffiti is a good start. I would be afraid I would spell something wrong for all the world to see if I spray painted my home.
Love that post Andrew. I've moved more times than most, thrice over on hands and fingers and then I lost count, most during my childhood. I think that's why now in my adulthood and my home it feels like there is just so much clutter and when I say that friends think I am funny. I think I got used to traveling light, but it's nice now to have someplace to hang my hats and knick knacks, kick back and know I am home.
Andrew- This is the best thing that could ever happen to you, new age or not!
Clearing is so healthy and decluttering clears your soul. It moves the energy so more good can come into your life. I always feel so good after I give all my junk away. Now, whenever I want to buy some thing I ask myself, how is this serving me? If it to collect dust and something more to clean, I will not buy it. I can not even stand anything on my bathroom or kitchen counters. It all has to be put away.
Congrats on the featured post. It will be fun to read all the new stuff you will share as you relate all the "wonderful" experiences that will unfold. Here is wishing NO disappointments along the way.
Andrew - I have moved so many times in my life that I have to stop and think about it - 4 times before I graduated high school - then 12 times before my first child was born (I was 30 then) - another 17 times since then - wow, 33 times in my life so far!!!!! Trust me, that is reason to travel light!!!!!
Andrew - I think we should all move once every five years, and in to a house that is at least 200 sf (or has one room less) than the last house. Wonderfully creative post (as usual), and intense vid you shared.
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house. Shouldn't you be in Dallas right now looking for the man on the grassy knoll? 
Andrew, I agree that everyone should experience their business from the consumer side of the desk or counter - whatever the business.