From our earliest memory of remembering things, we know that there is death. As children we might see other children die in one of our classes, or perhaps a grandparent, or a beloved pet. It stays with us forever - that knowing, that understanding. For most of us, it happens to someone else.
I'm struggling with the current deluge of death in my life. Particularly when it's not a pet or grandparent. It's somehow easier to accept those deaths even though they inflict great despair and sadness. And when children die, it's incomprehensible.
But as a middle-aged person nearing retirement age, I'm seeing my friends get sick and die. Friends that I've known since my children were babies. Friends that I play bridge with. Friends that weren't best buds, but were dear to me. Friends and friends and friends. What is happening?
Cancer. Brain. Pancreas. Breast. Pancreas. Ovarian. Brain.
Yes, that's the most recent tally. Think of that - a tally. Like I'm just checking them off in some little book because it's so inevitable.
Today one friend was laid to rest. And also today I got the word that yet another friend was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. The former was a new grandmother and had a daughter who is expecting her first child. The latter has two grand sons that she is so in love with I think she might burst. Everything they do is relayed to us in detail - she is so head-over-heels by them. Those little toddlers - will this be their first understanding of death?
So why is it taking so long? The cure, I mean. Let us pray everyday for one.
It is truly the Emperor of All Maladies.
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