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englishOn June 6, 2007 the United States Senate voted to make English the official language of the United States, with a vote of 64-33.  The bill also states that no person has a right to have the government act in another tongue unless specifically stated by law.  In an unprecedient follow-up on this bill Europe has decided to follow suit (sort of)!  Read below to hear all about it:

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as 'Euro-English'.

In the first year, 's' will replace the soft 'c'. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be dropped in favour of 'k'. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome 'ph' will be replaced with 'f'. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. 

 

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.


Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 'e' in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v'.


During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords
kontaining 'ou' and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi  bl riten styl.  


Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas. 
 

If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl

 

For all your Las Vegas NV real estate needs please either call or e-mail me.

 

sig

www.MaryW.com  or  www.MaryWarren.com

Jon Zolsky, Daytona Beach, FL
Daytona Condo Realty, 386-405-4408 - Daytona Beach, FL
Buy Daytona condos for heavenly good prices

This is hilarious. The funny thing is that you still can understand.

In Russia after the revolution they reformed the Russian alphabet and did something similar to what you are showing.

As a result, there are now 33 leters in Cylilic, and there were many more. No matter how funny this sounds, these things happen, and I wouldn't be surprised that they may be needed.

Take American English. There are certain things that Americans simplified. And we all survied it. Cheque became Check, and there are some other words.

May 12, 2008 04:31 PM
Christine Hart Howlett
Painesville and Eastern Lake County - Painesville, OH
Keller Williams Greater Cleveland NE

Very, very clever!

May 12, 2008 04:37 PM
Jim Crawford
Long & Foster - Fredericksburg, VA
Jim Crawford Broker Associate Fredericksburg VA

How clever!  Very funny!

May 12, 2008 05:06 PM
Garreth Wilcock
Sherlock Homes Frisco - Frisco, TX
Sherlock Homes Frisco

Hysterical. I love the colour of your wit!

May 12, 2008 06:27 PM
Linda Scanlan
A Fan of AR - Burleson, TX

Mary - what a giggle! LOL But wait...this could actually happen! LOL

May 12, 2008 11:17 PM
Simon Conway
Orlando Area Real Estate Services - Orlando, FL

I have a warning for you. In Europe this is really possible. There are a bunch of people who get paid to come up with garbage like this and before you know it, it is the law. I could give you many examples of what I mean, but you'd think half of them were jokes.

May 13, 2008 01:04 AM
C. Bartch
Newark, OH

Hi Mary, Very creative and humorous post!

May 13, 2008 01:38 AM
Kevin Robinson
Twin Falls, ID
Fractional Developer

This is very funny. With political correctness gone rampant it actually would not surprise me to see it happen.

May 13, 2008 01:41 AM
» Bill Burress Nationwide Mortgage Originator
» Bill Burress Nationwide Mortgage Originator - Fort Myers, FL

Mary:

Good one.

May 13, 2008 03:39 AM
» Bill Burress Nationwide Mortgage Originator
» Bill Burress Nationwide Mortgage Originator - Fort Myers, FL

Mary:

Congratulations!

This post has earned featured post status on the Silent Majority group in ActiveRain.

 

 

 

 

 

May 13, 2008 03:42 AM
Mike Saunders
Retired - Athens, GA

Mary

Good Post. In the PRC, under Mao, something like this did happen.

He changed the way the language was written. However, he also changed the way words are spelled (or pronounced) in English. For instance, x is pronounced sh so the town XIAN is pronounced Shian, or the words for Thank You, xie xie are pronounced shay shay.

Q is pronounced 'ch" so Qang is Chang.

There are a whole bunch of others also.

 

I really like your charicature!

May 13, 2008 09:16 AM
Leslie Stewart
Oregon Licensed Broker with Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Real Estate Professionals - Stayton, OR
Realtor, ABR, CRS, Oregon Licensed Broker

You are so funny!  And yes it did make me smile and giggle.

May 13, 2008 11:52 AM
Gary L. Waters Broker Associate, Bucci Realty
Bucci Realty, Inc. - Melbourne, FL
Eighteen Years Experience in Brevard County

Humorous..I was expecting some diatribe about English being the second language in the USA!

May 14, 2008 05:52 AM
Thesa Chambers
West + Main - Bend, OR
Principal Broker - Licensed in Oregon

wow - this was funny - and when I realized I could still read it thought... wow maybe I should take out a couple letters too... lol

May 14, 2008 02:59 PM
Cheri Smith
Prudential Gary Greene, Cypress TX - Cypress, TX
Realtor Prudential Gary Greene

lol. That was cute.

May 15, 2008 04:26 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH@properties - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Then there is that old joke -

What is someone who is tri-lingual?  Well, he or she can speak three languages.

What is someone who is bi-lingual?  Well, he or she can speak two languages.

What is someone who is mono-lingual?  Well, he or she would be an American. 

We should be ashamed of ourselves!

May 17, 2008 10:05 AM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Terrific Mary. I think I have gotten tongue tied just reading this post. Very creative.

May 17, 2008 05:21 PM