Real Estate Blog - FSBO Foot-In-Mouth Syndrome

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FSBO Foot-In-Mouth Syndrome

Home sellers can be their own worst enemies when they develop a case of "foot-in-mouth syndrome". It's a common ailment among all home sellers - especially FSBO's. Symptoms include the following:

Sincere (mistaken) belief that buyers share sellers' priorities and taste.
Assumption that marketing is all about property features, when it's really about the buyer's wants and needs.
A need to fill silence with noise by talking too much (about the wrong things).

Perhaps you saw my recent post titled My Daughter Made an Offer on a FSBO this Weekend.... Not only did this very nice woman make the mistake of trying to negotiate on her own behalf, without any negotiating skills, she suffered from "foot-in-mouth syndrome". Let me give you some real life examples of how this condition played out:

My daughter and I spent about 15-20 minutes walking around this 1950's era house located two blocks from a university campus. Based on our experience and her goals, we talked about things she might do to make this house more enjoyable for her (cosmetics), maximize the return on her dollar with updates over the course of time, and make it a more profitable rental property for the future. Topping the list of "to-do's" were add a second bath, update the existing kitchen and bathroom, and rip out the 70's style harry-homeowner built-ins. We both have some experience with real estate investment, rental properties, and college-town communities in particular.

However, Madame FSBO said that extra built-in storage was a life-saver - without it, there just wouldn't be enough (yet, without it, closet space was double that in any dorm or grad student housing); she went on to say they never replaced the windows or updated the bath and kitchen because that would over-improve the house for the neighborhood. After 8 years of professionally managing student housing, Susan knows the importance of doing this, but the seller's comments had the effect of making her feel stupid for even considering it.

Hmmmm. Why didn't this seller just keep her mouth shut? Why didn't she ask questions about what the buyer liked/disliked and then validate the buyer's feelings about the house? Instead, she just weakened her own position in negotiations because she severely diluted the buyers' excitement about the property. Her "foot-in-mouth syndrome" AND her poor negotiating skills were the reasons Susan walked away from this property which suited Susan's wants, needs, goals and budget.

Madame FSBO, I hope you learn from your mistakes - you lost a well-qualified buyer who would have been very happy with your property. Please read 25 Mistakes Home Sellers Sometimes Make - At least five of them should look familiar, because you made them.

This was a disappointing experience for Susan, but a good one for me (from a professional perspective) - it reinforced in my mind the value I provide to home sellers.

Related Post:

In Defense of FSBO's

UPDATE: This experience awakened Susan's desire to buy a home, and we spent the rest of my visit to Texas looking at neighborhoods. By the time I left last night, she was safely in the hands of a buyer-broker of her choice and they were submitting an offer on another (mls-listed) property today.

Posted by Margaret Woda, Maryland Real Estate on 05/14/2008 09:03 AM

Comments (67)

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Originally posted at: Fort Meade - USNA - Andrews AFB: FSBO Foot-In-Mouth Syndrome

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67 Comments on FSBO Foot-In-Mouth Syndrome

MAY

2008

Great story...our job is very important, we just need the customers to be convinced of it...thanx for giving me a chance to contemplate this

Good article! I was always tought the first person to speak after a proposal looses.

Excellent post!

Margaret- I think the seller will learn to reget those words. I cannot imagine a property that close to a university that would not benefit from an upgrade like you mentioned. College kids love to have a nice place to live and will pay for it. Especially for a location as close to campus as this is.

Best,

Scott

Its even good for Realtors to ead this - you always have to get back to basics when negotiating.

Thanks

Aloha, and have a great day

Lance Owens (RS)

(808) 936-8383

Lance@KonaHomeTeam.com

www.KonaHomeTeam.com

Aloha Kona Realty Inc.

78-6740 Alii Drive

Margaret--Even as a professional Realtor, I wouldn't negotiate to sell my own home as it is too easy to get caught up and say the wrong thing...better to have another agent to negotiate on my behalf. I don't understand why a FSBO thinks it is soooo easy. Yes we do provide a very valuable service!

I always find myself cringing when I have seller clients that want to be present for showings. I try to remind them not answer any questions unless they are approached and to let the showing agent do their job, and if possible wait outside on the patio or porch to allow the buyers to feel more comfortable. And I do warn them by saying the wrong thing you could cost yourself a sale and at worse case a law suit.

Since it is such an emotional desicion to buy and sell, this is why so many turn to us to handle the akward questions and negotiating price and defects in a property.

Thanks, all, for your comments. I hope you'll forgive me for not addressing you individually as I am out of town. Instead of acknowledging you here, I'm going to try to reciprocate comments on your blogs.

I will say to Scott - Susan knows the best tenants will be grad students who are more focused on academics than parties, and they definately want a "grown-up" place to live for the 2-3 years of their Master's or Ph.D. program - i.e. less turnover, as well as less damage.

Why in the world would Mrs. FSBO point out potential negatives???? Lack of market knowledge is (IMO) the biggest killer of FSBO deals. They don't know what the norms are and forget to get out of their own way - exactly why most of them need professional assistance.

Very good post. In most cases less is more....

Great post - I have come across this type of seller recently as I have tried to help FSBO's.

Thanks for the great post... I enjoy your blogs!!!!

Margaret,

Wow. This lady almost had it sold. Maybe the inspection could have helped you two out-bottom line-

Get a Realtor.

Steve

Less is more - A life lesson!

I live in an area where well water is common. In one transaction the Buyer and Seller negotiated that the Seller would credit the Buyer $3,000 at closing for a new well. The old well was a slow producing well but safe to drink from. AT closing the Seller demanded that the $3,000 be held in escrow. He wanted the money back if a new well could not be installed. He stated that he had tried for years to have a new well installed and no one could do it because the yard was too steep. Poof. Deal dead. Moral of the story - people are still negotiating at closing, and even sellers represented by professionals can throw a "monkey wrench" into things.

Margaret: Bottom line? She's not a Realtor.......who hopefully WOULD be able to know how to treat a potential buyer......and know what TO say and what NOT to say. ;-)

Enjoyed this one too! That's why we are "professionals". FSBO's take heed!

Awww....well I am sure she will find the right house. I don't think anyone ever likes being made to feel stupid. What a shame.

FSBOs! FSBOs!! FSBOs!!!

When will they learn? I don't know why anybody will opt to operate on themselves when there are

millions of well-trained surgeons out there. I, as a matter of standards and deterrment , do not sell FSBO properties because doing it plays into their distorted preconcieved notion that realtors are worthless.

Hi Margaret. Loved the post. FSBO's in your area would benefit from your experience.

MAY

2008

That is a good lesson for not only For Sale By Owners, but for everyone involved in selling a home.

Hi Margaret,

Another fine post! I know your daughter wpn't take the experience personal and will rebound and find what she is looking for. Sellers and be so brain dead at times.

Great post, I enjoyed reading this follow up. FSBO's have lots to learn but then that is why we are here, to do the job right.

great points all around on this one. I am glad that I took a moment to read it

good post..I have listed many fsbos..they don't have a clue about what is going on and with all the new laws...they need us!!!

Congrats on your "two" feature posts Margaret....it is amazing how little people know about our business, (the business of selling real estate) yet it looks easy. Everyone knows what a home looks like and selling must be simple....a Realtor can do it! You have made some great points. I have book marked your two posts and would like to go over them with my agents. They know these issues but it is easy to overlook. Great Posts Margaret.

Margaret,

I think your advice is good for all not only sellers and FSBOs...Thanks, Fran

A week ago or so, I was on a lunchtime POWER SHOWING and had 3 lined up for my ready,willing and most importantly ABLE buyers to see. The last of our tour presented a challenge when attempting to use the key to open the front door; I was struggling, wiggling, trying all my tricks to open the front door without success. About 2 minutes into the struggle, a car stops, backs up; pulls into the driveway and who appeared? None other then the owner! Hmmm , nice timing I thought; he says: "I was driving by and saw you having trouble getting the front door open and thought maybe I could help" Hmmm, nice man I thought...great, he would open the door,be on his way and so would we. WRONG

Mr "DESPERATE HOMEOWNER" decided to jump right into bed with us and took over the tour himself. He babbled about this; and that and accentuated a particular shed in the backyard that he said " I should've put it over there when I built it; and that was a mistake, its okay where it is; but if I had to do it all over again, I sure would place it over there..." Each room we entered, we heard about that shed and how "IF HE HAD TO DO IT OVER AGAIN" and "WHAT A MISTAKE HE MADE", in between attention coming back to the shed he shared his expertise in knowing WHAT is important to buyers "these days", and how "he really needed to have this heart surgery but hunting season is more important than THESE DOCTORS OPPINIONS"

Repeat after me Mr Homeowner: SHUTTA UPA YOU MOUTH..........please??????

His home is still on the market, is ANYONE surprised? least of which HIS REALTOR!!!! Poor thing

Thanks for sharing Margaret; thankfully your daughter has YOU as her guide

Have a beautiful day

Patti in N Illinois

I rarely show a FSBO, because about 90% of the time they're overpriced by tens of thousands. But once when I did, I noticed an active leak from a water pipe in the basement, complete with long-term corrosion. I pointed it out to the seller, thinking he might want to go ahead and get it fixed, and his reply was, "Don't expect me to pay you what you think you're going to get." The buyer overheard that, and was ready to go!

Margaret: What a shame! Obviously the owner's opinions don't count as she doesn't want to live there anymore. She'll never learn. But if you went back to her and told her how this fell apart, you might end up with a new listing....though I'm sure she'd be among your most high maintenance clients.

Curious, Joetta? Did you contact the FSBO ahead of time? Ask him/her for a ONE TIME SHOW? and ask him/her to please sign or initial it before you scheduled the showing?

I always always try to develop a little "warm & fuzzy" with the FSBO before I ever show their property. Actually I never show a FSBO listing unless I specifically have someone who is EXACTLY what the FSBO is looking for. Then I will contact the seller, try and develop any kind of a repore with them; tell them I have someone who is looking for their home, they are in the exact price range,they are pre-qualified and then I ask if they would be willing to agree to a ONE TIME SHOW AGREEMENT.

If they are? We're a GO! If not? I would not show their property. Simple. I adore working with FSBO listings; I must say I have had 100% success with everyone of them.

Sure they might be overpriced; but just like anyone we encounter, its our right and duty to attempt to educate them, and there is a multitude of ways to do so. I respect your opinion though; and am sorry you had that negative experience

FSBOwners are not for everyone, they are a different "animal" LOL

Have a beautiful day ; thanks everyone for sharing; every story helps me develop me into a better Broker/Realtor and Investor

Hugs

Patti

AWESOME IDEA, CHRIS!!! I agree; and who knows? maybe high maintenance, maybe just educated! Its a good thought Margaret...let us know if you should decide to go back to her and share what happened

Hugs to all

Patti

Just checking in, first thing after my return from Texas. Thanks for all the comments and dialogue.- I'll look at them more closely this evening, since I gotta go prepare to show property now.

Update re my daughter: she's now working with a local RE/MAX agent and they submitted an offer on a property this morning, after I left.

Margaret - I have seen this happen with sellers who are represented, and with FSBO's, too, which is one of the reasons that I tell my listing clients to please leave the premises when there are showings taking place. I suppose a FSBO doesn't really have that luxury, though, huh?

One lesson that took me as an AGENT to learn was not to FEAR the silence. I thought silence meant I had "lost" the clients attention and therefore the deal. What I realized was that me being selectively silent showed my confidence in the statement that I had just made. Or when they walked a home and said... hmm that looks broken / ugly / small whatever if I just kept them moving and only verbal acknowledged the positive things they said... soon out of their need to engage me they started making only positive statements...what do you think their lasting impression of a property was .. Positive.

Doesn't fear the silence use it as a tool.

Eric Reid, Managing Broker Renaissance Realty Group Inc. Short Sale Certified Search All Georgia Homes for Sale at www.GeorgiaOnlineHomes.com

Great Post! I think Realtors need to understand that FSBOs can be a useful tool because the buyer may perceive value in;

#1 The seller's ineptitude - selling way below market or not accounting for some key improvements. It could also be a fire sale from a death or divorce.

#2 No Realtor commission could be money in the seller's pocket resulting in a lower purchase price.

Certainly, not every seller is cut out to sell their own home and the complexities are best left to the professionals, but to be the best you need to consider others points of view. A seller doing a FSBO could attract a value seeking buyer not otherwise found.

I do loans for every kind of person imaginable, and I can tell you that MOST first-time homebuyers believe that they must hire and pay a realtor, but they want to save their money for a down payment instead. This is incorrect, but perception is reality.

I don't care for FSBOs personally. Nobody knows what they are doing and surprises are too prevalent. I do understand FSBOs though and they can function seamlessly.

Valuable information for any seller and sometimes even us agents who can sometimes insert feet also.

I think we all get "Food in mouth Disease" from time to time. Somethimes we even get "Finger in Email Disease"....

Okay, folks, I came back from a 4-day vacation, where I wrote 2 quick posts about my daughter's real estate experience. Then I came home to 2 featured posts - Wow! Gotta love the gold stars (thank you, ActiveRain gods), but there is no way on earth I can acknowledge and reciprocate every comment AND catch up on business. You know how it is... business always picks up when you go out of town!

I am a little surprised at some of the comments; this dialogue clearly has expanded beyond comments on my commentary about ONE prospective buyer, seller and failed transaction.

Dialogue is good, but I'd like to re-iterate that these posts are not meant to lump all FSBO's into one mold or to judge them - it's just a post about my daughter's experience and my observations of what occurred.

FSBO sellers sometimes think they know it all. She was too busy telling how smart she was.

Even when they are not in a FSBO situation you as an agent need to take the emotion out of the situation.

This is al SOOO true! Many years ago, before I got my real estate license, my husband and I were looking at FSBO's. I got so sick of women trying to show me the kitchen! I DON'T COOK! I couldn't care less about the kitchen!

Sellers also don't realize that the buyers probably don't want to know about all the little maintenance items that have been done until that house has made the short list. My buyers usually just want to look at the floor plan and take notes on their MLS sheets at first. It's when we schedule a 2nd or 3rd visit that the buyers become interested in the details. AND the buyers will ask, if they want to know.

Great post! Foot in Mouth Syndrome sounds costly!

Margaret-This series of blogs on FSBO's is among your best work yet IMO! The info here also works well for people trying to do the flat fee MLS route. Many people don't realize, that marketing is only part of what a professional realtor will do for them, helping them negotiate the best deal and getting them painlessly to the closing table is essential as well.

rapport is spelled rapport

Great post and oh so true! FSBO's have no idea how to market or negotiate. They must learn the hard way!

The truth is that these mistakes can be made by ANY seller! They're not limited to FSBO's.

Margaret, the last statement you made just changed my mind about this post thread... and it is positive now.

There are a lot of unrepresented sellers (FSBOs) that are going to be capable of handling their transaction smoothly and efficiently. In fact, there are some that are going to do a better job of it than many agents. Others... not so much.

Margarete: Way to hang in there...... Good luck to your daughter in the purchase of her new home

love it! I would love to reprint this for fsbo's!

MAY

2008

All those reasons is why people need the professionals -- only some of them do not realize it.

I love spending time helping FSBOs. IT's a great opprotunity to share some experience and potentially build up some rapport for a potential listing.

Margaret: Excellent post and further, I have had REALTORS(r) who made similar mistakes with me on negotiation... Something they don't teach in real estate school! Gary Keller of Keller Williams fame teaches that agents should adopt a philosophy of life-long learning (just one of the many reasons that I love Active Rain!), and this is just one of the many topic areas that agents need to be students of. Thanks again for a great post and primer on FSBO mistakes! Steve

You know what they say - Ignorance is bliss... and it's also a matter of perspective. I'm sure Madame FSBO, in this case, is thinking Susan missed out on the best house in Dallas-Fort Worth because she doesn't comprehend the vast number of available alternatives for any buyer.

I guess this is the reason that most FSBO's eventually list with a Realtor.

Great Story! - SO TRUE - We could share it with a FSBO contact but they wouldn't "Get it" because they never see the faux pas they're making -

Thanks for sharing it!!

Great post here. Most of these FSBO's are not sales professionals or marketing professionals. The legal repurcussions of a sale handled incorrectly can also be a nightmare. There's so many things to juggle and hats to wear... For these reasons, I have always recommended that my clients hire a professional.

Your post serves as another reminder of why this is critical in todays market. Great post.

Chad Weber - www.fsboleadportal.com/blog

Your post serves as another reminder of why this is critical in todays market. Great post.

Chad Weber - www.fsboleadportal.com/blog

FSBOs often make the mistake of assuming that since they are the expert on their home, they have the best odds of selling it themselves. Unfortunately, what they fail to understand is that they know nothing about the individual buyers' needs - which a good agent already knows.

Great post Margaret and very sound advice for the FSBOs. So true, like you said it just reinforces your value as an agent. Hope your daughter got the other house.

MAY

2008

Thanks to everyone for your comments - I have read every one, but this got featured while I was out of town and didn't have enough computer-time to acknowledge or reciprocate. Thanks for understanding - I have caught up, at least with acknowledging comments, on the third post in this series and I'm about half-way through with reciprocating on comments for that one.

MAY

2008

Nicely written! I've had so many instances of wanting to call up a seller and educate them, sometimes about their realtors MLS innacuracies. Of course I stop myself... that's why they need us! So many stories of sellers saying the wrong thing. So little time.

MAY

2008

Whether a FSBO or sale with representation, well meaning homeowner comments can undermine a sale. That is one reason I prefer the homeowner not be present during a showing.

JUL

2008

This is what also happens if your listing is owner occupied with the owner being present at all showings, the listing gets shown and the seller talks the buyer right out of making an offer.

I have yet to find a diplomatic way for telling the sellers "Shut your mouth!"

During the showings they need to LEAVE. All they are trying to do is save a commission but in the end it might cost them.

JUL

2008

It appears this post has taken on a new life in recent days, and I thank you for your comments! As I re-read this post for the first time in a few months, I was reminded of that day and how I shoock my head in disbelief as the seller systematically killed that potential sale. It all worked out for the best, however, as I am in Texas again to help my daughter move into her new home - found by her REALTOR.

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