Why I Fired My Secretary...

Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very much like waking up that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!" and possibly have a present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday."
I thought... well, that's marriage for you, but the kids will remember. My kids came to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office I was feeling pretty low and somewhat disappointed. As I walked into my office my secretary Donna said, "Good Morning, Boss, Happy Birthday!" It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered.

I worked until one o'clock and then Donna knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it's your birthday, let's go out to lunch, just you and me."
I said, "Thanks Donna, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. We went to lunch, but we didn't go where we normally would go. We dined instead at a little place with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office, Donna said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?"
I responded, "I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
She said, "Let's go to my apartment."
After arriving at her apartment Donna turned to me and said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for a moment. I'll be right back."
"Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and after a couple of minutes she came out carrying a huge birthday cake...followed by my wife, kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers; all singing "Happy Birthday."
And I just sat there...

On the couch...

Naked.