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Sundays at our Multi-Generational Home - Ode to Mom and Dad

By
Industry Observer with Nature As Neighbors

We both really love Sundays. It's a great time to work on a joint project, or catch up on things put aside earlier in the week. My sister and I trade off hosting the family meal and today is her turn. Therefore, we're free to spend most of the day doing what we choose. We might even head to a favorite trail instead of tackling chores. 

The sun is rising through the big fir trees, we can hear the hummingbirds chirping at the feeders, and our white Golden Retriever, McKinley is napping now, after waking us up promptly at 6:00 AM. Our mugs are filled with hot coffee and we're enjoying a relaxing morning.  Our parents are still sleeping and there is little noise coming from elsewhere. 

My sister and her husband live the separate, and private, daylight level of our house. Mom and Dad live in a wing of the house on the upper level with my husband and me. Our plans to build them a separate ADU (accessory dwelling unit)  were can canceled due to health requirements for dad.  We've reconfigured things to ensure more privacy for us.

Living in a Multigenerational home requires a lot of open dialog and patience with one another. Misunderstandings, feelings of resentment, and differences in personalities can create tension. Family issues from long ago tend to crop up again with a vengeance. Especially those issues where healing and growth are still needed. 

In our opinion, it's all worth the effort. The perks far outweigh the struggles and we can't imagine mom and dad in a nursing home. Naturally, that may be the best option for other families, and we understand. There's no right or wrong, figuring out what's the best for your own particular situation is personal business. This works for us, and we know this lifestyle has brought us all closer in the last two years. 

The ability to handle the health issues of aging parents is just one of the reasons the Multi-generational home is gaining popularity in our country. Financial benefits, emotional support, and social enjoyment are also big factors listed my many of our clients. It really helps us understand their needs since we too live this lifestyle. 

We specialize in selling homes, and multigenerational homes, on acreage in Clark County, WA. Having Nature As Neighbors and elbow room for the soul soothes emotions and offers relaxation from a busy life, and a chaotic world.  If you're interested in learning more about the benefits of a multi-generational lifestyle, contact us today. 

Posted by


Debb Janes  Bernie Stea
Brokers/REALTORS®
Call or Text 360-608-4900

We help buyers and sellers in Camas, Washougal, Brush Prairie/Hockinson, Salmon Creek, Felida, and other Vancouver, Washington Areas. 


We bring our passion for nature and beautiful environments to Real Estate. Multigenerational and family estates, country land and homes, and small farmsteads are our speciality.


We agree with our clients, "The true luxury of rural living is having elbowroom for the soul.

 

Comments (29)

Michael Jacobs
Pasadena, CA
Pasadena And Southern California 818.516.4393

Hi Debb and Bernie -- it sounds like life, your own multi-generational home is a work-in-progress from the building itself to the many components associated with the choices your entire family is making.   Here's to the opportunity of making choices.

Aug 20, 2017 01:21 PM
Dick Greenberg
New Paradigm Partners LLC - Fort Collins, CO
Northern Colorado Residential Real Estate

Hi Debb & Bernie - You have all done so well with your living situation and created a continuing source of joy for everyone. It's an inspiring example of how to do multi-generational living, and anyone considering that choice would be wise to seek your advice.

Aug 20, 2017 02:12 PM
Gary 'Banana' Houghtaling
Phoenix Property Shoppe - Phoenix, AZ
Phoenix Real Estate Agent

Hi Debb & Bernie I am sure your parents are happy they are with you and well taken care of inspite of the learning curve it's taken for all of you to manage.

Aug 20, 2017 02:50 PM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

Debb and Bernie- I love what you're doing!!! Ages ago we had multigenerational homes but times have changed and family members move around. You are setting a shining example of what can be done.

Aug 20, 2017 06:12 PM
Paul S. Henderson, REALTOR®, CRS
Fathom Realty Washington LLC - Tacoma, WA
South Puget Sound Washington Agent/Broker!

You are blessed be able to share these moments with your entire family. Oh by the way thank you for sharing it with us Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD 

Aug 20, 2017 10:55 PM
Roy Kelley
Retired - Gaithersburg, MD

Thanks for sharing some of your personal experience in a Multigenerational home. 

Aug 21, 2017 03:30 AM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good morning Debb and Bernie - when you talk to clients about multi-generational homes you know because you live it.  It really is a wonderful arrangement for those who can do it.

Aug 21, 2017 04:33 AM
Amanda S. Davidson
Amanda Davidson Real Estate Group Brokered By Real - Alexandria, VA
Alexandria Virginia Homes For Sale

Debb, you have such a special home and one that's filled with so much love. Beautiful photo of your folks, their eyes say it all.

Aug 21, 2017 06:10 AM
Beth Atalay
Cam Realty and Property Management - Clermont, FL
Cam Realty of Clermont FL

 Hi Debb, beautiful photo of your parents, their love for each other shines through. I did the best I could with my mom living with me, wasn't easy but I managed for eight years. 

Aug 21, 2017 04:12 PM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-739-3843

This just emanates the true meaning of love and family. Debb, it is ALWAYS such a delight reading your posts because they are honest and true and inspiring to boot. 

This reminded me of a conversation I had with my fun-loving grandmother who would visit me out here (back in the 80s) and even at that time she would talk with me about "granny flats", a new concept at that time. 

Makes me miss her!!

Aug 23, 2017 04:08 AM
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Flower Mound, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD - You made the choice and you're living life to the fullest with your parents, sister, and family members in a multi-generational home. That photograph of them is so special! If those were my parents, I'd have that photograph framed and hung over the fireplace or some prominent place in the home. Parents were our first teachers and even though as adult children with families and siblings, we all think we know best, it's our parents who still guide us, teaching us the importance of family, love, and the ties that bind us together. 

This story you wrote could be the beginning of one of those "Chicken Soup for the Soul," series. You are truly an inspiration!!! Their love story still lives on and so does yours.

Aug 23, 2017 07:27 AM
Debb Janes

Thank you Patricia. Your kind words mean so much to me. D 

Aug 28, 2017 06:18 AM
Colleen Fischesser Northwest Property Shop
NextHome Experience - Chelan, WA
A Tradition of Trust in the Pacific NW since 1990!

HI Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD I really enjoyed reading your very transparent post. You're right, it wouldn't be for everyone but it's working for you and your sister so kudos. Funny story, I used the term multi-generational in a NWMLS listing about 4 years ago and they flagged me as being a Fair Housing violation. 

Aug 23, 2017 09:40 AM
Debb Janes

Hi Colleen - isn't that funny? Times are a changing... :) 

Aug 23, 2017 10:18 AM
Kathy Streib
Cypress, TX
Home Stager/Redesign

                          Thank you Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD 

Aug 26, 2017 06:06 PM
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Debb and Bernie. I think you are caring, focused and smart. Clearly you are embracing the family you have. Wonderful photo of your folks.

Aug 27, 2017 06:40 AM
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Good morning Debb and Bernie. Seems like you have adapted to what works best for you. Few could do it as well. Enjoy your day!

Aug 27, 2017 07:17 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Hi Debb and Bernie

What a wonderful living arrangement and lifestyle you and your family live, a true testament to how others can do the same. And since you live it, and get it, you are in the best position to help others who are seeking a similar multigenerational lifestyle.

Jeff

Aug 27, 2017 07:49 AM
Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®
RE/MAX Platinum - Waukesha, WI
Giving Back With Each Home Sold!

I can see why Kathy chose to  highlight you post today....great stuff!

Aug 27, 2017 08:04 AM
Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
Retired New Hampshire Home Stager

What a sweet picture of your folks....adorable!

My mother couldn't position herself on dad's lap without a lot of difficulty. Not at all flexible or in control of her balance to handle that. 

Aug 27, 2017 11:49 AM
Debb Janes

Not liking that your mom has balance issues, but appreciate ( and like ) your support, Sharon. 

Aug 27, 2017 02:14 PM
Debb Janes
Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
Put My Love of Nature At Work for You

Kathy Streib is awesome to help promote this lifestyle and our experiences. Thanks to her for spreading the word with the inclusion in her weekly series, and to those of you who visited due to her post. D 

Aug 28, 2017 06:20 AM
Joanna Cohlan
Fresh Eyes For Your Home - Chappaqua, NY
Designing, Decorating & Staging Westchester Homes

What a beautiful photo of your parents Debb.  You deserve to be highlighted every day for the incredible daughter that you are.

Aug 28, 2017 09:39 AM