Actually, some of those make sense. If you are doing a short sale, the lender has to approve the commission, which is usually less than what is printed in MLS...thus the need to disclose.  But I have to admit..."potential short sale"?!!!

How about, "Sink holes in backyard are vole homes."

Hi Jim, I share your opinion.  Some of them border on the ridiculous, and should really be avoided.  Thanks.

Paula Swayne (Windermere Dunnigan Realtors, Sacramento)   Some are, but some are also owned by agent owned and still priced totally wrong.

 David Saks (The Real Estate Mart of Tennessee, Inc.)  LOL!

Denise Shockey Melbourne, Brevard County Florida Real Estate (RE/MAX Elite)  It is the entire listing when youtake into consideration no photos, no marketing call agent on vacant homes?

Jim.....You have some really good points here.  thanks for sharing.

Pam Winterbauer ~ 2006 REALTOR® of the Year (Windermere Welcome Home)   Anytime.

Jim:

I beleive the one on commisions and the bank is esential.  The others can be of great humor and have you questioning if the listing agent even read them.  The pictoure one was good.

The "potential short sale" and the one about commission have value. A seller might "think" they can short sell, but until the bank actually determines it, then it is only a "potential short sale". The commission comment - in Arizona the MLSwon't let this info be listed this way. But in truth the comment is valid in states where this is an allowed statement. But you are right- many things end up in the MLS comments that leave one shaking one's head.

Nothing like reducing the chances of selling the home from the start.........

Jim, I have to agree with you.  They make the home seem undesirable or put the seller in a bad negotiating position.

love it! I see a lot of these and need to make some notes. Anything that says "Subject to..." scares me a little.

Comments and photos... areas where it is more than obvious that an agent (1) doesn't care or (2) is brain dead.  I blog about bad MLS photos and it is very sad how some agents 'represent' their clients.

Jim...

I must admit, I have been guilty of entering a listing with the thought of going back later and improving the comments, only to have weeks go with the remarks intact.

This should serve as a reminder for all of us to check our listings and make sure that we are making sense!

'Potential short sale'?  Well, let's just wait a little longer and we can get a better deal!  'Commission subject to bank approval?'  Not showing that one at all!  One thing that my BIC taught me when I was first in the business was to read your comments as though you were the one looking to buy--if it doesn't draw you in, what makes you think it'll bring you a buyer?--and that was in the hay-day, too!!

I called a seller a few weeks ago to show his home.  He said to me "You are free to show it, but even though no one is home, I WILL BE WATCHING.  I have cameras all over that house that broadcast over the Internet to my work and I WILL BE WATCHING."  I decided not to show...  For my own safety and that of my buyer...  So agents aren't the only strange ones we deal with in this business...  Let's be frank...  It is a weird world - some are licensed, some aren't! 

Excellent comments!  I need to add these to the lists that I just wrote about in my blog on how to write ad copy..lol.  Thanks for sharing, Jim!

Great post with excellent talking points! That camera info was spooky. Makes you wonder about the ones that are watching and you have no idea...

Our MLS narrative space is limited as probably others as well. Why waste space with such?

I find it most comical when there is a time sensitive comment with a date and we are past the date.  Apparently some don't update much.

good post..I have seen many remarks like this, Also many sellers haven't even seen their mls printout..what a shame!!

my favorite is "the above ground pool can be removed"  lol really now?

Hi Jim, I like the to sell is to show, just saw an expired listing the other day that said the same thing, it had been listed for a yearlol--Bart

Jim, some of these MLS comments can go with the picture of the home with snow on the ground. Poor MLS comments or incomplete MLS data doesn't help to market the home.

Good Post!

I also like the agents who have never been to the home and then put driving directions to the home. My latest adventure in Pensacola.

West on Cervantes to W St. home off of W St.  The home was actually 11 blocks west of W st on a 2 home street with no street sign...My GPS had trouble finding it...She kept telling me to turn right and they was NO right...If you do not want me to show the house don't list it. It make my job earsier that way.

Good morning Jim - You wonder sometimes how some agents pass their real estate exam. Have a great Memorial Day Weekend.

There are some even more riduculous things that are printed in the MLS remarks. Those are pretty absurd too!

Jim: Agents should really look at what they putin the MLS and ask this question.... WOuld I show this house ?

Now for Short Sales.. Yes you should Identify that it is a short sale or someting to the fact it must be approved by a 3rd party. This is only being fair to the other agent and the buyer as short sales can take longer to close

I will say that some of these do make sense. Especially the 1st 3 I dont see anything wrong. Now I know here in Orlando since short sales are a majority of our market we have special working for 3rd party approval but looks fine to me.

Hi Jim ... yes I've seen a lot of incredible remarks on my MLS, but "potential short sale" ... new one to me. 

Steve's comment about the camera, now that is scary ... big seller is watching ....

Jim, I've read some doozies myself, and wonder what the agent was thinking at the time. 

I love this.  If you ever want a chuckle, just browse through the Agent Remarks or Public Remarks.  It's worth a good laugh.

Jim:  I love to read through the MLS listings.  Most of these must be done late at night after a glasses of someone's famous recipe!

I can't stand it when agents put "see commission" or '3%commission" in an area where the buyers can see it, such as in the neighborhood section.  Of course, this is when the buyers ask what it all means.  Selling agent agreements are between agents, not for the public.

I dont see anything wrong with these comments except some of them look like they were written by a third grader. If these homes are going to sell the buyer will need this info...

In my State it is necessarry to disclose that the seller is an agent; if he is.
My MLS requires that we disclose short sale status, if thats what it is
The commission needs to be disclosed including bonuses and possible adjustments .
The fact that the seller will remove a hazard (the pool)before settlement is good to know and may help me sell the home.
The fact that there are dogs in the home is an important fact and should be mentioned
etc etc

As a buyers agent I appreciate all the relevant info in the mls, Including the negative. It helps me develop a tour of properties just right for my buyer with no surprises. In fact. In this market with so many buyers specifically requesting distressed properties, the more negatives the better.

My pet peve is what I referred to above, ie the comments look like they were written by a third grader. I send listings to potential buyers and when the comments are written without regard for proper grammer or spelling,  I think it reflects badly on me. (like in your post when you confuse the word jest with gist.) Unless this is just a clever play on words (I missed the joke) gist is the word you were looking for. 

Call me crazy, but I saw nothing wrong with any of the comments.  The comment about the pics and there were no pics was funny though. 

The commission ones need to be stated as in short sales, the bank will set the commission and the listing is subject to 2rd party approval.  I appreciate that info. 

I really like the one about bribing the dog, LOL...very entertaining.  At least they're warning you!

"Price reflects owners desire to sell, etc"  Any owner who wants to sell their home in a down market should be pricing it to sell.  DUH!   There should be one that says owners has priced their home to sit on the market until he&& freezes over :-)

I liked the post, and agree with some of the comments, that some of the terms may be required by the MLS. What I don't get is when agents say things like "This will go fast" or "Don't miss this opportunity - priced to sell quick!" and they leave the comments in after 6 months on the market.

Jim... It is amazing what realtors come up with.  My favorite is "DOGS WILL BARK - CALL AGENT IF CONCERNED".  This is priceless.

One of the most over used, waste of remark space things I see is "show and sell"...  Duh.

Isn't that the idea?

One of the most over used, waste of remark space things I see is "show and sell"...  Duh.

Isn't that the idea?

Hi Jim,

Thanks for the good laugh. On the positive side, always good to have a fair warning about large dogs! Have a great day, Michael A. Caruso

Jim, all great ones. FEAR NOT. All the brain dead agents do not ONLY reside in the Atlanta area. I have seen that one about the above ground pool possibly could be removed, as that was one of the negative comments given. Funny stuff. Show and sell with two years on the market? What is wrong with this picture??

Sounds like everyone's MLS comments.  It's good to see the humor sometimes.

This is some funny stuff... going on all the time in AZ also .... my favorite is #  4 with no punctuation.

I wonder sometimes if some of these agents go home at end of the day and have a stiff  drink while posting the listing on the MLS. :)

Some agents post the directions to the homes all wrong and wonder why the listing isn't sold, or the wrong zip code vor subdivision name  so you can never find it etc... you get the idea.

I hope that some of these agents get out of the market or get better.

This is some funny stuff!

I guess you'll see more and more of this when there is a lot of inventory on the market and sellers or agents become very highly "motivated" to sell the home.

Jim,

Just a classic...that's all I can say.

Jim - It never ceases to amaze me of some of the 'public' comments I read and no doubt many are borderline against most MLS rules... but it must be a tough job to keep track of it all! It sure makes for a smile a day, don't you agree? I know I am pretty picky as to what my MLS reads and the general public perception! Great awareness post...Hello Agents....Hello!!

Jim...

Personally I am not so sure I would want to show a listing that had the subject to bank approval remark. I think that's cause for concern :)

TLW...ROAR!

Jim, That is too funny! I always have agents double check my remarks if I have a question about it sounding the way I "mean it to in my head", if that makes sense.

My favorite remark has to be #9! Must close in order to receive bonus. DUH!

Great post!  Enjoyed some of your MLS comments!!  I always like the Realtors that still (after being taught over and over and over) use words like "walk to the park", "top school system" and many more things they should never mention.  The best is not uploading any pictures.  Every buyer says if a listing does not have a picture, they will skip it.  I am sure these agents have been told the same thing.  Why do they continue to not market their properties though?  Strange!

I recently read a comment that said "enter at your own risk" -- well that is very inviting!

Wow!  I never anticipated such a response, and there is no way I can answer each response individually!  I have read all of them and love all that was shared.  The fact is that each day I can come up with others that are just as crazy and nonsensical.  The comments are posted by agents that represent to their clients that they are professional enough to get the job done.  Obviously many are not.  These aren't typos, these are for the most part lacking better judgment and forethought.

     Personally, I think the MLS should give more room for remarks. Everything ends up being cryptic, and short-handed.  With great effort, most of us try to put in all the "highlights" without multiple abbreviations that may confuse potential buyers.

      Of course, there is always the entertainment factor.

RK Ruthman (Ruthman Real Estate)  The entertainment factor would make all our days more fun!

Jim,

Those were great.  I gotta wonder about the thought process of any agent who allows (or worse encourages) their client to advertise that they are desperate.  I have seen studies which indicate that desperate looking properties take longer to sell and sell for less.  It is just bad marketing.  I see FSBO's doing that around here all the time and that is a different story but REALTORS should know better.

About the camera's.  They are a reality.  My wife showed a house last week that has a 600sf bonus room with an elaborate train setup (the entire room).  She was warned going in that the room was under surveillance and I didn't see the setup but from the description she gave me the owner has untold dollars invested and I could not blame him.

Too bad though, My son is a train nut and I would have loved to sneak back in with him and play with the trains <grin>.

I love the commission subject to banks approval. No thank you! Also all the expired bonuses are hilarious.

Jim, a little proof reading would do us all good.  I'd better go back to see what my listings say.    Our MLS doesn't allow much room for comments. 

I'm not even sure how to comment. What's up with #4? LOL! I guess it's not a Code of Ethics violation, but it sure sounds stupid!

It's usually late when I enter data into the MLS. (no drinking involved). Years ago I entered a new listing and emailed it to the seller for approval. He called me the next morning laughing. It was to do with the "large panty in the kitchen". Now whenever I write that word, I try to remember to put the "r" in "pantry".

Jim you are right on the money about this. I see some crazy things written as well and often wonder if the seller has ever read what is being displayed publicly about their home.

Some of the comments are troubling but our MLS and state regulations require us to disclose owner/agent and short sales. Additionally, 75% of the SW Florida short sale MLS listings have that disclosure about the reduction in commission.

I believe that the agent's brokers need to do a better job proofreading the work of their agents and their office's MLS listings. If an agent isn't able to use proper grammar he/she shouldn't be able to enter in their own listings.

Early in my career I was going to show a house and the lister told me I had to bring dog biscuits and he thought that MIGHT quiet the dog.....mmmm...might, might not....no showing.

8. DOGS WILL BARK - CALL AGENT IF CONCERNED.

LOL!!!

What is the agent going to do, console you?  Give you a pat on the back?  Send over some Xanax to relieve the tension?  hehe

Jim, great post! One of my clients was so dismayed with the discrepancy between the actual conditions upon visiting properties after reviewing the listing descriptions, that he coined his own ambiguous term "extreme". This term could be used to reflect the state of the property when other words could not describe it accurately - The last place we looked at was in "extreme" condition - not saying it was good or bad, just extreme.....Ambiguous enough?

How about the description on the lot size when an agent lists the house on a large 1 ac. lot. I have yet to see one that says it is on a small 1 ac lot. There are a lot of agent's that give us a little comic relief with their descriptions. Good post

Most of those comments should be left for the broker remarks section. Also some are in violation of MLS rules. You can disclosed short sale to the broker but doing so to the public is doing a diservice to the seller, especially if the buyer's Realtor doesn't know that you can get it closed. That should be left for the broker remarks and the agent should call with probing question to the listing agent to see if they actually know what they are doing in regards to a short sale.

I believe the short sale deals and the commission should be disclosed if subject to approval by lender or a third party.  I think agents should post "Relocation Addendums Required" and other variations if they are a condition of the sale.

Howard Goff -- Clark County Vancouver Real Estate (Realty Executives)  I don't think there is any thought process. Believe me I was kind by not posting some ridiculous ones.

LaNita Cates (REMAX of Joliet)  One that I did not post sadi bank owned, and buyer agent will be notified after the contract  of commission and addendum. Hello?

Kay Van Kampen, Broker, Springfield Missouri Real Estate (RE/MAX Solutions)  We have very little room for much commentary.

Lisa Hill (Daytona Beach REALTOR®) (Adams Cameron and Company)  Incredible isn't it?  Why not kennel the dog?

Lisa Hill (Daytona Beach REALTOR®) (Adams Cameron and Company)  Incredible isn't it?  Why not kennel the dog?

Elaine Reese, REALTOR® in central Ohio (Real Living HER, Worthington Ohio)  Elaine that is too funny!  I am guilty of similar faux pas also!

Bill Gassett Metrowest Massachusetts Real Estate (RE/MAX Executive Realty)  I agree.  Really the seller needs to review the MLS listing.

Power Brokers Real Estate  I've give up trying to shame the brokers for getting involved!  When they are sued they will!  Too late then!

Sally & David Hanson, Southeastern Wisconsin Realtors (First Weber Group)  A lot of folks will pass on showing after reading that comment.