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"ONLY IN AMERICA" (Humor)

"ONLY IN AMERICA"

(HUMOR)

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America......do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Sometimes it's just healthy to take a step back, not take ourselves so seriously, and have a good laugh!

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

Posted by Kirk Westervelt - Greenville, SC Realtor on 05/24/2008 03:10 PM

Comments (16)

humor, america, jokes

Post is included in group: Keller Williams 'Rainers
Post is included in group: POSITIVE ATTITUDE for the Weary Soul

16 Comments on "ONLY IN AMERICA" (Humor)

Hi Kirk, And a good laugh I had ! Thanks and have a terrific Memorial Day weekend !

05/24/2008 03:13 PM

by Bill Gillhespy Fort Myers Beach Realtor (Century 21 Tripower Realty)

I love the hot dogs one. So true and I hate it.

05/24/2008 03:17 PM

by Adam Brett - Fullerton, California Realtor (RE/MAX NOC)

Good stuff. I like the number 5 comment on banks.

05/24/2008 03:24 PM

by Chuck Carstensen (Re/max Associates Plus/The Discovery Coach)

Thanks for the chuckles!

05/24/2008 03:29 PM

by Michael Mackey (R) ABR, CRS, GRI (CENTURY 21 All Islands)

Kirk, This was great! I just hope I'm not on the road when the person at the drive up ATM machine is using braille!

05/24/2008 03:33 PM

by Roberta LaRocca REALTOR® Las Vegas Broker - Salesperson (Keller Williams Realty The Marketplace)

Kirk~ They were too funny. Hope you have a nice holiday.

05/24/2008 03:36 PM

by Owensboro KY Real Estate Specialist Vickie McCartney Broker,ASP,ABR (Home Realty GMAC Real Estate Owensboro Kentucky)

Kirk,

Very funny and oh so true ! Have Great Memorial Wekend !

05/24/2008 04:38 PM

by Elena Martinovici Broker- Phoenix , Arizona (Professional Marketing Realty)

Have a pleasant Memorial Day. I'm going to spend some time thinking about some of the other stupid things that we do.

05/24/2008 05:35 PM

by David Spencer & Assoc., Broker & Lic. Instr. CE and Pre-Lic.

Number 10 really worries me, lol.

Thanks for the laugh.

05/25/2008 10:21 PM

by Kara Casamassina, "Boomers and beyond..." (The Carolina Real Estate Company)

It's nice to have a good laugh before getting to work. Thanks for the humor. I wonder where you get this stuff!

05/25/2008 11:15 PM

by Bill Kennedy - Greenville SC Realtor (Keller Williams Realty Greenville Central)

How true.... so very true, God bless America!

05/26/2008 03:53 AM

by Denise O'Dell ~ CA Mobile Notary/Loan Signer/REALTOR® (SANTA CLARITA MOBILE NOTARY)

Kirk, this is good. I am featuring it in my funnies recap to be published today.

05/29/2008 11:28 AM

by Danny Thornton (Home America Mortgage, INC.)

Kirk, you are the man! I loved this blog! Please join us on the Optimist Group and post this to our members! You'll fit right in with that group.

05/29/2008 12:59 PM

by Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Connection

By the way, may I use this on my company's blog, please? It will have your name and info. I just want to share it with my clients.

05/29/2008 01:00 PM

by Mirela Monte, Your Myrtle Beach Connection

LOL Kirk..these are so true!Maybe we could order a pizza while we wait for the ambulance?

BLRGUY

05/29/2008 01:28 PM

by BLRGUY(Beach & Luxury Realty Inc)

Kirk, I found Ballpark Grillmaster hot dogs. They are large, so they come 5 in a package. 2 packages of dogs match the 10 buns!

05/30/2008 08:22 AM

by Brian Schulman - Your Lancaster County, PA Real Estate Professional (Coldwell Banker Select Professionals)

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