CORONA VIRUS WAS INTERVIEWED (just for fun)

Moderator: Well I will not welcome or thank you for this interview but instead will try to understand your point of view. So, what brings you this way? Why are you here? What do you want? How long will you be staying? You understand that you are not welcomed so let us begin this interview and end it quickly too if for nothing else but health reasons (ours) not yours. I will not apologize for the in-hospitality, distaste or abruptness in advance but I do mean it!

MODERATOR asks the questions     CORONA VIRUS  answers...

1. What do you want? I want to live just like you do!

2. Why can't you live elsewhere? Why can't you?

3. Alright. You are a parasite correct? Yes however I resent that

4. Without us you cannot live correct? Yes however I prefer to live on my own or on animals 

5. How do you feel about us trying to destroy you? It's mutual and I will fight back where I can. 

6. Will the quarantine slow you down? Yes it is an effective deterrent and is injurious to my health

7. You know we are preparing a vaccine to harm you! That's why I am spreading as fast as I can

8. Where did you come from? Well my hometown is Wu-Han China but I find I like just about anywhere

9. How do you feel about the flu? Well it is a good place for us to hide. Same with colds

10. You know how this will end don't you? Yes, but not w/o a fight!

SNEAKY MOVES

Moderator is pacing himself verbally and physically keeping at a distance of 6 feet during this interview and the virus planned some sneaky moves during this time. One of them was he got the Moderator to touch his face. Shortly after that, the virus caused a cough. The moderator pulled back and requested a quick time-out. The virus agreed with a snicker

SECOND ROUND

Moderator has come back in a body suit, full head enclosure with full frontal see-through visor, gloves, shoe coverings and several vials of different colored liquids. The Virus became alarmed and took a stand stating what is this all about? The moderator stated oh didn't they tell you how this interview will all end for you? We plan on running this story but you won't be around to read it. The virus, stood-up panicked, but to no avail

MODERATOR DREW FIRST BLOOD

Moderator pulled his NyQuil-gun and fired. It wounded the virus! Then, a series of alcohol wipes and soaked q-tips were pelted in quick succession causing the virus to cry-out in pain and recoil. A bottle of Anti-bio-tics was pulled and the virus tried to leave the room but found it sealed-off. Tylenol comforted the Moderator all during this time. Then fired from the hip, a series of attacks one after the other.....

1. A pine-sol blast!

2. An alcohol squirt

3. A Lysol floor and wall spray

EPILOGUE

After-wards reports listing loud screaming and wailing not of a human kind reaching a high crescendo followed by a deep, long-lasting guttural sound that trailed off into an echo fading away in agony until it can be heard no more. All future viral-contact after this will be met with a vaccine bomb which will fire lethal one-time multiple kill shots. Virus eliminated!