Doveryai no Proveryai, meaning: “Trust but verify.”
Sizing People Up, A Veteran FBI Agent’s User Manual for Behavior Prediction, by Robin Dreeke and Cameron Stauth, published in 2020 by Penguin Random House LLC. This book has everything to do with thinking, analyzing, and predictions. As a former HR Recruiter in Dallas (1997-2002), I was trained in Behavioral Based Interviewing in 1998, and I have read books by former FBI Agent, Joe Navarro on Body Language; however, this book report is much more comprehensive and educational for learning new skills about learning to trust and verify.
Preface
Because of my former background I was inspired to read this book, "Sizing People Up." No matter what a person's occupation is, you have to think like an historian, meaning what's your background, what do you know, what do you need to know, do you have the facts, can you verify, are you able to stay focused and remain disciplined. This book report/review aroused out of curiosity about my previous and current life experiences. Sometimes, people believe they are right because of what they know, but learning is continuous and to stay current and grow, we have to understand people, what they want, and how can I be a better person to understand their needs. This is the reason why I was attracted to "Sizing People Up," and other books that teach me something new about how I interpret data and facts and to be careful when communicating effectively. This is a book, I highly recommend. It exceeded my expectations and like a spoiled child who wants more, I wanted more. Therefore, if another book is published by this author, I will be sure to read it.
About the Authors
Robin Dreeke graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy and served in the U.S. Marine Corps before entering federal law enforcement in 1997. He directed the Counterintelligence Behavioral Analysis Program of the Federal Bureau of Investigation and retired as an FBI Agent. Cameron Stauth is the coauthor of ‘The Code of Trust’ with Robin Dreeke.
What I Liked About This Book
The story begins with an overview of American history, specifically 1982, when President Ronald Reagan and the Soviet Union agreed to “freeze construction of all new nuclear weapons.” The two World Leaders invoked the “Russian motto of ‘Doveryai no Proveryai,’ meaning Reagan would only trust the Russians if they could prove they deserved it, ‘with facts and figures.’
Chapter I does a deep dive into September 11, 2001. Ironically, Adam Feinberg from ActiveRain and Robin Dreeke both narrowly missed being in the World Trade Center on the day the Towers were struck. Like busy bees, most people in business buzz around and stay focused on time, place, meeting deadlines and people. But do we really know how to read people and accurately predict what they’ll do.” This book is really about slowing down and learning how to do a better job on reading people. Below is an excerpt from “Sizing People Up about trust:”
“Trust is the active form of faith. It demonstrates---in real time and in the real world---a belief that people will not only try to do what they say they will, but also have the competence and diligence to make it happen. A betrayal of trust is one of the most devastating experiences that can happen to any human being, partly because it’s almost impossible not to take it personally. It wounds you deeper than an accidental loss, because it makes you not only doubt other people, but even yourself, thinking that you should have known better.”
What I Did Not Like About This Book
This book does not address how to deal with people from other countries knowing their culture, language, customs, and the ability to size anyone up when conducting business. I have traveled to Switzerland, Italy, France, Monaco, Mexico, and Japan. What they all have in common is their own language, currency, etc. I could not drive, read a menu, or communicate with anyone without knowing how to do so. Words and gestures mean different things to different people.
Summary
The author fluently illustrates the importance of effective communication: “The best way to build the empowering alliances,” is by “virtues of trust, honesty, and mutual support.” Non-communication is “an effective method of conveying and interpreting what people truly believe.” But it may not be “consistent with what they are saying.” Our actions “speak more honestly than words.” What we think, and what people do may not be congruent or true. The world was changed by September 11th. Moving beyond political correctness is a big step in moving forward. Truth and validity are crucial.
This blog post was inspired by the ActiveRain August 2021 Challenge hosted by Kathleen Daniels, Probate & Trust Specialist and suggested by Debe Maxwell, CRS
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