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Unkind Words Leave Scars

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 311291

 

She was one of those little girls who was all sugar and spice, but it was no longer nice when the 'spice' came out.

Whenever someone or something bothered her, she lashed out with harsh words. It was a problem at school and home, and her parents knew that they needed to do more than tell her to stop.

One day, the girl's dad took her out to the back fence, along with a large bucket of nails and a hammer.                                             

  He said, "Honey, every time you lose your temper and say something hurtful, you need to hammer a nail into the fence."

Like many young girls, she adored her Daddy, and she agreed to try it. Days and weeks went by, and many nails pierced the wooden fence until one day the girl said, "Daddy, here's the hammer - I don't need it anymore. I haven't said a mean thing for days."

"That's great, Sweetheart. Take the hammer back, and every time you control your temper and are kind to someone, remove one of the nails."   

The girl rolled her eyes and groaned, but she agreed to do as her dad said. It took many weeks, as the nails were pulled out and returned to the bucket one by one. Finally, she handed over the hammer and proudly said, "I did it, Daddy. I was nice to people, and I've removed all the nails.

They walked to the backyard together. Dad wanted her to see the results of her actions. Everywhere she removed a nail, a dark aperture was a permanent mark in the wood. He wanted her to realize that fence will never be the same.                                       

This story of removing the nails is an excellent lesson to learn.

Unkind words, even when taken back, leave scars.

 

To Buy or Sell a  Home

Call Margaret Rome

 

Margaret Rome

 

Posted by

Margaret Rome
HomeRome Realty
Broker/Owner/Realtor®

Baltimore, Maryland


Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

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Jana Holmstrup
Jana Holmstrup - CCO - Kings Mortgage Services, Inc. - Visalia, CA

This is great!  I recently had an opportunity to clear up something that has bothered me for 45+ yrs.  A former HS classmate emailed me about something unrelated, and I took the opportunity to bring it up.  Something I said back then seemed to have set him off, his response was angry as he screamed something unrelated and slammed out the door, leaving me with a 'huh'?  We weren't even close, but it had always bothered me whenever I thought of it.

So when this opportunity came up (45 years later) I had to ask him about it.  He knew exactly what I was talking about, how he reacted had bothered him, too. We had a great conversation clearing the air on the situation.  All is well and it feels good!

Some nail holes can be patched 😉

Jan 10, 2022 08:14 PM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Jana Holmstrup, Lucky you were able to clear the air even after forty-five years!  Thanks for sharing.

Jan 10, 2022 10:00 PM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Hi Margaret - this is a good story with a lesson.  Words hurt more than sticks and stones.

Jan 10, 2022 10:06 PM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Paddy Deighan MBA JD PhD And thank you for your comment!

 

Jan 10, 2022 10:07 PM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Grant Schneider As mentioned in another comment. "That old kid's saying "sticks and stones..." was not the truth."

Jan 10, 2022 10:09 PM
Cathy Starkweather
La Rosa Realty, LLC. - Celebration, FL

I remember reading a similar story years ago and sharing it with my children, although the child was a boy. I had completely forgotten about it, which is hard to believe since it's so powerful! Thank you for this, such an amazing analogy. :) 

Jan 11, 2022 04:45 AM
Kat Palmiotti
eXp Commercial, Referral Divison - Kalispell, MT
Helping your Montana dreams take root

What a fantastic story and ensuing lesson. We cannot take back words, but we can decide how we will react when unkind words are directed to us.

Enjoy your Tuesday!

Jan 11, 2022 05:09 AM
Dorie Dillard Austin TX
Coldwell Banker Realty ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
NW Austin ~ Canyon Creek and Spicewood/Balcones

Good morning Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400 ,

Love the story because it illustrates perfectly the need to choose our words wisely. Once they are spoken we can't retrieve them.

Jan 11, 2022 05:12 AM
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Realtor

Loved this story, Margaret. As I've often said... words are like toothpaste... once you squeeze them out, you can't squeeze them back in. Think carefully before opening your mouth.

Jan 11, 2022 06:26 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Cathy Starkweather, I wrote this when I was new to AR (15 years ago). It is still relevant today.

Jan 11, 2022 07:10 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Kat Palmiotti  What a perfect comment:

We cannot take back words, but we can decide how we will react when unkind words are directed to us.''

Jan 11, 2022 07:12 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Dorie Dillard Austin TX, We can apologize and say we are sorry, but...

" Once spoken we can't retrieve them."

Jan 11, 2022 07:13 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Nina Hollander, Broker, Your comment would be an excellent title for this blog. Once you squeeze them out you can't squeeze them back in. 

Jan 11, 2022 07:17 AM
Ed Silva, 203-206-0754
Mapleridge Realty, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

It takes just a fraction of a second to release the words and it's an eternity and they are still not removed.  Just a second or 2 to think about what will be said and how can save all great angst

Jan 11, 2022 09:21 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Ed Silva, I think the second or two  thinking about the words is crucial

Jan 11, 2022 09:51 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

When I was a young gal in the 4th grade, our teacher taught us that when we had an unkind thought, to breath deeply 10 times before opening our mouth.

Jan 11, 2022 10:20 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

CONGRATULATIONS Margaret, on having this blog FEATURED in the Old Farts Club group!  

Jan 11, 2022 10:22 PM
Diana Dahlberg
1 Month Realty - Pleasant Prairie, WI
Real Estate in Kenosha, WI since 1994 262-308-3563

My parents gave us children (6 brothers and sisters) that we were to love one another as we would want to be loved ... and that if we had nothing good "positive" to say, it was best to say nothing at all.  It's hard to take back foul words once they escape out of our mouth and heart.

Jan 12, 2022 11:37 AM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Myrl Jeffcoat That teacher knew her stuff! That is a good exercise to do!

Thanks for the feature!

Jan 12, 2022 05:37 PM
Margaret Rome Baltimore 410-530-2400
HomeRome Realty 410-530-2400 - Pikesville, MD
Sell Your Home With Margaret Rome

Diana Dahlberg What wonderful parents you had!

"It's hard to take back foul words once they escape out of our mouth and heart.''

Jan 12, 2022 05:39 PM
Diana Dahlberg

Yes I did, and oh how I miss them both!

Jan 13, 2022 01:22 PM