Today I had an interesting exchange with a local elected official. I had hoped to meet this person to be able to discuss some concerns as a constituent. I was kind, polite, to the point, and kept the conversation private. My concerns echo many others in our community.
What I have found within our political arena are those who say things behind someone's back and the very few who will look you in the eyes and say the difficult things. I believe in the importance of going directly to a person. It's the right thing to do always.
Sadly, this individual did not hear a thing I was saying because they were too focused on being in defense mode. Instead of listening to what I was saying, the posture of defense drowned out my concerns. It became evident this politician did not desire to discuss anything.
This entire encounter brought me back to real estate. How many times have we valiantly tried to mentor another agent or provided needed feedback to a fellow agent only to be met with the attitude of defense? This exchange falls on deaf ears and ends up being completely non-productive.
So what can we do when this happens? First, we need to assess ourselves and make sure that we are mindful of coming across as defensive in these situations. Secondly, we need to accept that not everyone is ready to hear your concerns. Finally, despite the outcome, don't shy away from difficult face-to-face conversations.
Our clients, colleagues, and even our companions need to be heard. Are you listening or are you too busy defending your stance? Listening well is a learned skill.
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