I always go out with cards in the car. I do like your approach to this all and enjoy reading your blogs . Have listened to you and borino as well . Thanks for all your work

Be worthy of them.  Amen!

If you do a good job and exceed your clients expectations they will refer people to you spontaneously and often. I say treat them like family and stay in touch! Thanks for the post!

Betina

Jennifer, I like you style!  It's a lot like my approach.  Being a little subtle about the whole process works for me.  And being really, really good to your clients is the key.

I have been reading your post for a long time and I am cool with the theory.  I think the asking for referrals works too.  We do need to ask on some level...but perhaps not the person that we are receiving from.

Excellent points!

I always seem to agree with you!  even on my end of the business it is my past clients that feed me the most.  If you treat them right they will come back... I just hung up the phone with the son of an old customer, thats what it is all about, being trusted to work with their family... But you have to build that trust by doing the right thing from the beginning and being the best at what you do.  I still think you need to work your sphere... with the soft approach.  I am a firm believe of keeping in touch but with value added pieces, so they know where to find you... Just no Sappy begging for business pieces.

I couldn't agree more!  I'm working on marketing myself, improving my branding, and getting my name and services out as much as I can.  I realize it takes time.. and I'm working patiently.  I have seen my business increase.. slightly and I am working hard to stay in touch with past clients, my SOI, and try to make new contacts as often as possible.  I give my business cards to anyone who will take one and even distribute sport schedules with my card to open house visitors, neighbors, past and current clients, friends, and relatives.  I don't ask for referrals... but I do get them from people who know me and respect the professional I am.  It's a "growing" business.. not a "going" business!

Jennifer - Awesome post, thanks. Couldn't agree with you more.

Finding your own style of "selling" is the first step in becoming comfortable in your own skin/career.  A forced style is not effective for long.  For instance, I've never memorized a script and never well.  That's just not me.

As usual, I agree with every word.  This approach has worked well for me, allowed me to actually enjoy my career and sleep well at night, without having to worry my SOI is going to run the opposite direction whenever they see me approach!  LOL

Thanks for your take on a different approach.  I think there are times to ask for a referral in the right way because sometimes people just don't realize that you would like for them to refer people to you.

John Thomas - Certified Mortgage Planner - Primary Residential Mortgage

Thanks, Jennifer.  I've been listening to the "build relationships but ask, ask, ask for referrals" for too long.  I never enjoy it.  I always thought that if the people liked me enough and they new someone that needed my services they would refer.  And I certainly don't want to "pop by" unannounced just to say "Hi, how's the kids?"

This is something I just can't get a family member of mine to understand.  This person is always asking me if I've asked everyone I know . . .blah,blah,blah.  I am definitely uncomfortable with that approach, but maybe I will use it on just her since she doesn't seem to have a problem with it.  Do you think I'll get much business from her that way?  At least I know she won't start avoiding me - she's my mother!

Hi Jennifer.  Welcome back.  Thanks for writing again and making me believe I am doing it right!!

Ken

First thanks for the props, you know you've arrived when Jennifer Allan mentions you in her fantastic blog - even if it is to argue a bit :)

Where we should be marketing around our core values and strengths, we tend to prospect around personality.  The two largest polarizers being introvert vs extrovert.  The post that I wrote that was featured was much more extrovert and aggressively oriented.  Not bad in and of itself, just geared to those who are personality predispositioned that way. 

As an introvert personally, I tend much closer to your methods and think your approach is a fantastic one.

Keep up the great work!

Carpe diem,

Jennifer,

     I have always(since I first read it) liked your method of generating referrals.  I have never liked asking for them(and haven't much) and will not anymore.  I have always went out of my way to give the best I have to offer to ALL of my clients.  If that doesn't generate referrals then I guess I don't deserve them.

Hmm. I need to keep that in mind before I post.  Today I took a hardline stance w/other agents. I guess that is ok. I just need to remember to take a softer approach w/my clients.

Thank you so much for sharing - I enjoy your posts the very best!

Hi Jennifer,  Excellent review !  I was surprised that you never ask for referrals !   Good selling to you !

Yowsa!!! How did I miss my Gold Star???? I've been quite remiss in following up on this blog... been catching up from my little R&R...

First, THANK YOU to Chris P. for graciously commenting on my blog that sorta kinda contradicted his... and I agree 100% with Chris's analysis that different approaches work for different people. Many of you know that the whole Introvert versus Extrovert concept is something that fascinates me, so I appreciate his bringing it up. The most important thing to remember is that you don't have to change WHO YOU ARE to prospect effectively; in fact, the less changing-of-the-personality you do, the more effective your prospecting will be.

Bill - it's funny, I've never really asked for referrals, even before I realized I had a choice in the matter. However, every once in a while I did and got abysmal results from it. Then DING DING DING... I figured it out! And it seems so obvious.

Norma - Thanks!!!! I'm glad I'm helpful!

J&K - Good point!!! I'll bet those who claim to be successful asking for referrals would probably get them anyway cause they're good agents. But I'll bet they'd get even more if they'd lay off the asking!

Tracy - tell me more about what you mean by taking a hardline stance with other agents!

Ken T - You are doing it right. Promise.

Stacie - that's funny!!!!! Sure, hit her up on a regular basis and make Mama proud!

Ken M - Ugh... I'm with you; the whole pop-by thing just seems creepy. I certainly don't want anyone popping by on me! I get terribly annoyed with the title reps and mortgage guys who do it. 

Thanks Jennifer for pointing out there are many ways to get the same thing done .  It is so important to develop your own style and feel comfortable with what you are doing... I am not the hardline, aggressive type so I love your alternatives and use many of them already .  Thanks for a great post.

Jennifer, the best one I like on here is be a source for your SOI. Nothing better than people being able to tap into you.

Good advice Jennifer.  I am sorry I missed your webinar today. I'm sure it was very good information that was shared with the listeners.  But I still enjoy reading your blog.

Hello Jennifer! I am new to active rain and have been learning a lot in such a short period of time. I like what you have to say :-) Keep up the good blogging!

Hi Jennifer, I did read the last post about generating referrals and commented on that post as well. I am more comfortable with your school of business. If you are a type of person who does not feel comfortable doing what Chris suggested it will always show no matter how much you have practiced.

Jennifer, I like your approach so much better.  I just don't want to be thought of as "that pushy agent". 

Excellant, very good information. Thanks

Well this a refreshing post. Most everything you mentioned is right in line with what we practice. I don't believe I have ever heard or seen anyone else teach a passive method. I believe yours and Chris' conversation on introvert and extrovert are right on, and there is a way for everyone. Yours just happens to fit us better. Now I need to check out some more of your writings.

Grant

Love your blog.  I read the Pollinger blog on the same topic and it didn't sit very well with me either. I'm one who is always open to suggestions, but when I hear about those kinds of approaches they feel contrived and unnatural to me.  I knew an agent in my town who got listings all the time because he went to garage sales checking out the people having them who were moving.  I thought about it...briefly, and that approach just felt a little insincere to me. Maybe it's not and maybe he was doing them a great service.  Whatever the case, that approach doesn't work for me and I'm glad to see someone else out there who has new suggestions that feel more natural to how I like to work.  Thanks for your thoughts.  I guess I'll have to read your book now because I ended up spending half an hour reading your blogs and web articles. 

You make excellent points, but I just love the thought process behind Chris' Group 100 - people who are willing to refer you and only you...now that is a faithful partner. So far we have Group 2 - he and I would only recommend each other!!! He does IT for business and residential and I'm the resident Realtor(r)!!

Jennifer, this is more in line with how I do business as well and it seems to be working nicely.

Jennifer,

I have never been the hard sell type.  I believe in making and cultivating those relationships.  I don't have to ask for referrals because my clients are more then happy to refer me to anyone out there that they know that needs my services.

Larry - it really is that simple, isn't it?

Kathy - Works for me, too... kind of a no-brainer.

Dawn - Mutual referral relationships are great until one side becomes dissatisfied with the other... but until then... go for it!

Blake - I think a sign of maturity in a real estate career is learning to think for yourself.. if something doesn't sound like YOU, be proud that you have the brains to reject it. My personality made this a non-issue - there was no way I could do the things that made me cringe; it simply wasn't gonna happen.

Grant & Lisa - funny, I'm often "accused" of being too passive in my prospecting efforts... but if it's working, why change it?

Jim - Thanks for stopping by!

Bob - Shudder... me neither!

Mana - I agree. When I try to be someone I'm not, I'm positive my discomfort is obvious to everyone.

Jennifer,

Well thought out post, but I'll take exception to your opinion on Business Networking Groups.  I'll use BNI as an example.  It is not mutually obligatory in nature.  A good Networking group is about building trust and deeper relationships.  At least mine is!

Givng referrals with the impied emphasis that you are only doing this because you expect referrals in return is NOT the way to go!  Refer those you trust because you want your clients to receive exceptional service, dont do it because you want something in return.  You will actually receive less referrals in the long run with this mindset. 

You will find when you refer "from the heart" you will receive!  It's amazing how reciprocity works.  Dont refer others with caveats or strings attached.

Very interesting perspective Jennifer.  I love it when someone in the herd has the guts to go in a different direction!

Hi Jennifer, Loved the post!  So true!  I feel like agents hand out oodles of business card, always expecting something in return.  I love the perspective...I agree!  Keep up the great job.

I agree completely with your approach.  Even as a lender we are pushed to ask for referrals from past customers, spheres of influence, realtors, etc.  I hate to look like I am begging for business and agree wtih your stance--do a good job, be worthy of the referrals people send.  Great post!

A lot of good points and I also argree with being the best you can be and the referrals will follow.

Your approach fits my personality better. I tend to be low key by nature, and I've found many people like me a lot for just that reason. A more out front type person might find the more aggressive approaches work better. But all of your systems seem to fit me better.

I go with gentle reminders... Just keep reminding people that you are a real estate agent and would like to help their friends, family and coworkers with real estate needs.

Jennifer:  I'm with you on this one!  I DON'T asking for referrals, though I hear it being preached at most of my office meetings.  I LIKE your approach and, in fact, follow the same the same "rules" myself.  You derserved a "feature." Congrat's!!

I agree with a lot of what you are saying here.  I would say I am in the middle.  I definitely do not believe in pressure sales at all, but I think you will get more referrals by asking people the right questions.  

As a loan officer I ask Realtors about how I can add value or have a chance to speak with more of their clients.  They are typically very open to this and we can talk strategy.  I don't think you say, "Please send me a referral."  I think you can ask without asking directly and that can open people that like and trust you to the idea of referrals.

Olan Carder
www.charlottemortgageonline.com

Jennifer - Just got in from 2 glorious weeks in Hawaii to my mail and found my autographed copy of your book - can't wait to dig into more meet - Couldn't agree more with you about asking for referrals. Congrats and keep up the great work!     

I was always told to ask for referrals but never do. If my services are good enough, I shouldn't even have to ask. ! :)

I agree, and glad for the reminder not to accost friends, I like for things to just flow and not force anything.

Jennifer-  I love your soft approach.  It is the method I use and it has worked very well for me.

Hi Jennifer,

I'm currently reading your book and love what you write. I highly recommend it.

Sandy