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You're Dead, But We Still Want to Hear from You!

By
Real Estate Agent with Christie's International Real Estate Sereno 01153805

Listening is the most important part of sales, and it's also the most important part of customer service. There's no service, and no sales, without good listening.

Recently, I've been on the receiving end of bad customer service and bad sales. It's so bad that I had to blog about it. Because it's extreme, I think there's a valuable reminder to those of us in sales and it's worth sharing.

Some of the Active Rainers here may know that my father passed away about a month ago. (His online obit is at www.JohnNPopeJr.com.) There's a lot of stuff to do, loose ends to take care of, after a death, on top of all the grief and the other stuff going on. There are subscriptions and accounts to cancel, for instance bills to pay, practical things that need to be taken care of even if you're not in the mood.

For some reason, I've had a really hard time with Time Magazine, which my father subscribed to and loved.

On July 17th, my sister tried to cancel his subscription, but they could not do this without the account number on the label. Since my dad's mail was coming to our home (he was in the ICU about 7 weeks before he died), I had it and phoned them that same day to cancel.

Incredibly, the customer service gal I got on the phone was impervious to what I was telling her. I began by explaining that my father was deceased, so we needed to cancel his subscription to the magazine. It didn't stick, so she asked me twice more WHY we were cancelling the subscription. So I had to tell her three times that he died. I was ready to scream by the end. I'd have fired her if she'd been my employee - I was in no mood to be so badly ignored on such an important point.

Anyway, I slogged through that call and was told that a credit would be issued in a few weeks for the remainder of the subscription. Fine.

But today, in the mail, a postcard arrived to my father, asking if he would not please reconsider!

Please renew!

I was simply dumbfounded when I saw this postcard today. I had told the sales gal or customer service gal THREE TIMES that we had to cancel because he died. Not only did she not listen, but apparently either she did not input the information right, or the process there does not allow for "unable to renew, gone to the next life".

The last line is the worst: "we are looking forward to hearing from you."

(I may collect ghost stories with my HauntedRealEstate.com, but I don't think that's what they are after.)

So yes, it's bad.

What does all of this have to do with us as real estate professionals?

This is an extreme case of a person, and in fact a company, not listening - worse, really, being insensitve.

What about our clients? Are they trying to tell us things that we are not really hearing?

One of the worst habits that salespeople sometimes have is thinking about what WE are going to say next rather than listening to what our clients, prospects, or friends are saying while they're saying it. We get that "tunnel vision" and "need to control".

Personally, I think some of it falls on the bad habit of over-memorizing scripts and dialogues. Yes, I know that it's important to be ready to answer questions that we hear 100 times a year. Yes, it's important to be prepared. Sometimes, though, sales people are so reliant on their canned dialogues that they fail to listen - really listen - when buyers, sellers, and others are telling us what really matters to them.

When we fail to connect as caring human beings, when we stick to our scripts and dialogues or our canned presentations, rather than truly interact with a human being about the important stuff they're sharing with us, we truly miss out.

First, we miss out on the connection that is the basis for doing business. I'm talking about simple rapport.

Secondly, we lose trust. Who can trust us if we don't listen when something significant is shared?

And finally, of course, we lose the business.

In the case of this magazine, I was a fan and an occasional reader. A good friend of mine used to write for them, so that added to the esteem I had for it. But my treatment at this particularly sensitive time has been so poor that it has really fallen in my eyes. Of course, that's just one person, one postcard.  And yes, I will let them know that this was offensive because if I don't, they'll keep doing it to others.

With real estate sales, though, when you don't listen, the prospects don't call back and tell you why. They don't say "I didn't feel like you cared".

So my suggestion is this: don't just focus on your canned presentations, scripts and dialogues. Practice listening. Learn to respond to what you hear rather than trying to control the conversation with a predetermined outcome.

My hunch is that the folks you interact with will deeply appreciate the difference, and you'll win more trust and more clients.

 

Posted by
 
 
 
Mary Pope-Handy
Realtor, CRS, CIPS, ABR, SRES
 
CalBRE # 01153805
 
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Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

Mary, I was and am so sorry to hear of your loss.  I know all the work and unpleasant tasks that go after a death but cancelling a subscription shouldn't be one of them.  It's a very important reminder to not only LISTEN to people well but to HEAR them in any business.

Jul 26, 2008 04:06 PM
Mary Warren
Las Vegas, NV

Mary - I'm so sorry to hear of your father's passing.   The loose ends that have to be tied up after the death of a loved one seem never ending.  When my parents died many years ago that kind of thing went on forever, it seemed.  My cousins bought their house and they still got mail for them 3-4 years later (mostly junk mail, magazines that we continuelly tried to stop and were being delivered now without cost)

Jul 26, 2008 04:17 PM
Mary Pope-Handy
Christie's International Real Estate Sereno - Los Gatos, CA
CRS, CIPS, ABR, SRES, Silicon Valley

Carole - thanks. You aren't someone who needed to hear the message, I am certain!  Thanks for the understanding :)

Mary - thanks. You're right. There's still so much to do. Can't resent that, but it sure is hard when you tell someone "my father died" and they don't seem to care enough to remember such that it has to be repeated over and over. That's amazing that your cousins got mail for your parents SO long. I guess I do recall my dad saying that mail came for my mom long after she died in '96 too. Amazing.

Jul 26, 2008 04:25 PM
Alan 'AJ' Nisen California Contra Costa Mortgage Officer
A Large Bank in America - Lafayette, CA

Mary, first, my condolences at the loss of your Father.  I agree with you.  But sometimes we get caught up in our own world and forget that there are family, friends, biz partners and clients who we need to listen to and acknowledge.  I will have to work on this a little harder. AJ

Jul 26, 2008 05:53 PM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Mary - Im so sorry to hear about your dad's passing.  I can tell you it takes a few months to work your way through business affairs after the death of a parent.  I've gone through it twice.

That being said, your posting provide a good illustration of what is so wrong with customer service these days.  If we are lucky enough to get to a live person, our experience with that live person, is often no better than talking to a phone mill recording device.  Companies seem to train their customer service reps to work within very constrained guidelines, that leave little room for anything other than the way they want things to flow.

When my mother passed, we also had a few subscriptions that were continuing to arrive in her name.  I did manage to just change the address to my own, and since the suscription was already paid for, we used them until expired.

I hope your future cleaning up on estate matters become much simpler.  You don't need any added stress right now.

Jul 29, 2008 09:09 PM
Mary Pope-Handy
Christie's International Real Estate Sereno - Los Gatos, CA
CRS, CIPS, ABR, SRES, Silicon Valley

Alan - thanks Ditto that for me. Slow down and listen...

Myrl - this is my second time through now. Thanks for the nice words on the process and the post. My experience was so bad with this gal (and then the postcard) that I thought it's a real wake up call to all of us in sales. You never know how much it might harm someone if you don't really pay attention (or act as if you care).

Jul 30, 2008 02:17 AM
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Broker
Elizabeth Anne Weintraub, Broker - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Customer service totally whomps because we've got people in those jobs who hate their jobs.

 

Aug 02, 2008 03:00 PM