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Want Change? You First Have to Get Mad as Hell

By
Real Estate Agent with Atlanta Communities Real Estate Brokerage GREC #208281

We've all heard about how to boil a live frog.  You put it in a luke warm pot of water and slowly turn up the heat.  By the time it knows what's going on, it's too late for it to jump out .

I see this happen in many aspects of life.  Little by little, we get used to putting up with a little more heat and discomfort.  Suddenly, we realize how bad things have gotten and then we have a crisis on our hands.  It might be too late to really be able to do anything about it.

I have found that real change usually doesn't happen when you are happy and complacent.  It happens when you finally get sick and tired of compromising here and there and trying to be happy with less and less.  You finally wake up and are ready to take a stand.  It happens when a spark deep down inside of you ignites a fire that spurs you on to take action to make changes in your life. 

You all of a sudden stand up and shout, " I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore."  This is a line from one of my favorite movie scenes.  If you have time, watch this video clip of this scene from the movie "Network".  It always motivates me whenever I begin to have that helpless feeling.

It's all about passion.  It's also about not waiting until it's too late before you become passionate about something.  It saddens me to see so many people willing to give up little pieces of their life, liberty and happiness over time because it just is easier to compromise and submit. 

Have you ever had one of those clients who just keeps demanding more and more of you?  You take it quietly because you fear losing a deal.  Finally, you just can't take it anymore and you let them know just how you feel.  You overcome your fear of losing the deal and say what needs to be said.  It's one of the most invigorating feelings I know.  It's the awesome feeling of freedom. 

 

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About the Author:  Tim Maitski has been a full time Realtor since 1999. He has sold several hundreds of homes in areas around metro Atlanta.  Tim started with RE/MAX Greater Atlanta and is now with Atlanta Communities Real Estate Brokerage.

 

Along with blogging on ActiveRain, he provides one of the best real estate websites in Atlanta at www.HomeAtlanta.com .

 

His proprietary  "Maitski Line Reports" chart out the absorption rates over the past 14 years in 37 different market areas.  Know when it's a good time to buy or a good time to sell.    

 

His online Property Tax Calculator allows you to compare property taxes in many counties and cities around the Atlanta area.  He provides the Atlanta MLS Power Search Tool that allows searches of homes using over 35 specific criteria.

 

Over the years, Tim has optimized his business so that he now can offer a huge 50% commission rebate to his buyers.  The more experience one gets, the easier the job becomes.

 

Tim also has a "Five Days to Sold" System that uses an intensive marketing blitz to create a showing frenzy that creates urgency and offers.

 

Tim is always looking to LinkIn with anyone who is interested in building their social network.

 

View Tim Maitski ●Atlanta Realtor●'s profile on LinkedIn

Betina Foreman
WJK Realty - Austin, TX
Realtor, C.N.E., with WJK REALTY

When you get a client that is an emotional vampire, sometimes you have to fire them. I have only done it once, but if felt GREAT! Hang in there Tim. It will get better!

Betina

Aug 13, 2008 02:28 AM
Jim Crawford
Long & Foster - Fredericksburg, VA
Jim Crawford Broker Associate Fredericksburg VA

Hey Tim.  Good stuff.  A definition of insanity is doing the same thing expecting different results.  Sort of like the movie "Groundhog's Day!"   Breaking out of the rut is key.

Aug 13, 2008 02:29 AM
Ray Nelson
Exit Realty Expertise - Fredericksburg, VA

I know exactly what you mean, Tim.  I find that it helps me avoid that sort of situation if I set boundaries at the beginning of our relationship.  For example, I make a point of telling prospects that I will respect their time, as I know they are busy people. In return, I expect them to respect my time.  If I don't call you back for a few hours, it is because I am in the middle of something that cannot be interrupted, like showing houses or the like.  It seems to work as I don't get many of the high maintenance folks.  Great post.

Aug 13, 2008 02:37 AM
Ken Tracy
Coldwell Banker Residential - Naperville, IL
Helping clients buy and sell since 2005

Hi Tim.  Are you mad as hell?  No taking poop from clients!!!

Ken

Aug 13, 2008 02:38 AM
Corey Chase
Silvercreek Realty Group - Meridian, ID

Tim this is a great blog.  Most do just bite their tongue and deal with it.  I completely agree with standing that ground and pushing ahead.  Some take it to far and really need to be put in their place. If you give an inch most will take a mile.

 

Aug 13, 2008 02:38 AM
Lyvia May
Meybohm Realtors Of Aiken, SC - Aiken, SC
ABR, EPRO, SRES

Well stated! I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!

Aug 13, 2008 02:43 AM
Robert Huntsinger
Empire Realty - Upland, CA
Empire Realty Upland, CA - Full Service at a Discount

Hey Tim,

I agree with taking a stand, but if we took a stand on every little thing before it got to the breaking point we would have time for little else.

Take care!

RJH

Aug 13, 2008 02:44 AM
Rob Arnold
Sand Dollar Realty Group, Inc. - Altamonte Springs, FL
Metro Orlando Full Service - Investor Friendly & F

It is times like these that we all need to seriously consider changing what we are doing.  If it isn't working, figure out a way to do it so it does work.

Aug 13, 2008 02:52 AM
Rebecca Schrader
Competitive Insurance of Dundee - Dundee, FL

I had a VERY demanding client. In fact she was SO demanding she had my receptionist contact me while I was at a business luncheon. Her words, "you work for ME, if i show up at your office and you're not here, then how can you BE WORKING FOR ME?!" I calmly told her, "Mrs. So and So, I'm at a business lunch, but sit tight and I'll be right there..." I politely excused myself and assured my business associates that I would return very shortly.

I arrived at my office, and Mrs. So and So was very agitated. She preceded to follow me to MY office and I calmly told her, "no, just sit tight, I'll be right back." I went to my office, retrieved her file and handed it to her! I calmly informed her that I would no longer be able to work with her. She was too demanding, extremely rude, and very much NOT WORTH MY TROUBLE...GOOD DAY!

I returned to my Lunch date and boy did I feel good about what I had just done. The woman called later that day to apologize for her behavior and tried to explain...but I would have none of it.

Aug 13, 2008 03:09 AM
Annette Brown
Coldwell Banker D'Ann Harper - San Antonio, TX

That was GREAT!!!!   I really needed that motivation this morning.  Being new in the bus. I feel like I am burning out fast.   Thanks again.

Aug 13, 2008 03:28 AM
Paula Hathaway, REALTOR, LBA
Douglas Elliman Real Estate - Southampton, NY
...A Local Expert in all The Hamptons

Great Post Tim!!!

I like to use a very good line of advise when I talk to new agents and agents in training:

One of your most important, and little known options as an agent  when you are working with someone, either a buyer or a seller, is to choose to NOT work with them....letting go of a person who is draining you of your time, your money, and your self esteem is not only advisable, it is down-right necessary to be successful in this business.

If necessary---get angry, get VERY angry!!

Aug 13, 2008 03:57 AM
Renae Bolton
Marketing 4 Realtors - Garfield Heights, OH
I'm your Professional Real Estate Marketing VA!

Tim - This was excellent!  You know, it isn't just people who can drain you - it can be business as well.  So many of my clients contacted me because they were just fed up with all of the marketing and administrative tasks needed to conduct their business because these things kept them from their passion - helping clients buy and sell homes.  In some cases, getting angry and deciding not to take it anymore meant getting a Virtual Assistant to offload some of these tasks so that they could have a life again.

~Renae

Aug 13, 2008 04:21 AM
Andrew Gambini
Atlanta, GA

Tim,

 

I love your content, I agree that for better or worse, emotion is  usually the  first impulse of actually tacking action, for some anger works best.  Sometimes people can really push our emotional limits.   

There is an awesome book on the whole emotion thing called "Emotional Intelligence" I had to read in college and I did enjoy it, but your blog definitely topped D. Goleman on the entertainment meter specially the Video Link. If you do end up or have read that book I definitely want your feed back on it or anyone else here.  I agree that sometimes the anticipation and unknown of a result is worse than the actual outcome of the result.  

keep up the great blogs!!!

Aug 13, 2008 05:44 AM
Jeff Dowler, CRS
eXp Realty of California, Inc. - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

A valuable perspective, Tim, and pretty right on target with regard to many folks and how they respond. The problem occurs for some when they reach that point when they ARE really mad, and then sometimes they overeact, as with a client, friend, business associate, etc. Better to deal with the issue head-on, early on, in many cases. I guess I prefer to know if there is an issue rather than having someone just take it for a while and get fed up, and then let have it.

Jeff

Aug 13, 2008 08:25 AM
Tim Maitski
Atlanta Communities Real Estate Brokerage - Atlanta, GA
Truth, Excellence and a Good Deal

Betina,  thanks for stopping by.  Don't worry.  I'm doing great. 

Jim, I love Groundhog Day, especially since I'm from Pennsylvania.

Ray,  Boundaries are key. 

Ken,  I've learned to not allow things to build up so I don't have to get mad too much.

Cory,  It's about sticking to your core values

Lyvia, I hope you get motivated to make changes

Empire,  It's about sticking to your core values and not letting them get chipped away little by little.

Rob,  Just do it.  Getting mad helps you get over the hump.

Rebecca,  I've been there and know how you feel.  Sometimes people like seeing that you are strong enough to not let them walk all over you.

Annette, Hang in there.

Paula,  Yes, it's what you need to spur you to action. 

Renae,  Whatever it takes.

Andrew, I'll make sure I get that book.  I hadn't heard of it before.

Jeff,  That's exactly the point.  Don't wait until things build up too much.  I not suggesting to blow up on anyone.  It's more of an internal personal thing.  You have to get that fire going inside so you get take the necessary action.

Aug 13, 2008 09:15 AM