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29 Comments on Even If It's Painful, Agents Should Always Tell Buyers the Truth
Love your response. I had this happen to me a day before the closing. I told the buyer walk. You will lose your 1k deposit but if you think the deal is no good then so be it. They bought in the end
Elizabeth: I think you did the right thing. From the sounds of it, he really didn't want to buy. You had answered all of his objections, and he still wasn't comfortable. I had a similar buyer once. She had me looking for a home without a tree in the yard because she was allergic. In Virginia, that is impossible. All townhomes come with some sort of tree or shrub. But I had answered all her objections and this was one that I couldn't. The obvious, "You can remove trees, with the HOAs permission, from any home you purchase." That didn't work so I laid the same truth on her. "Sounds like you may not be ready to buy." She came back to me one year later...unreasonable requests gone.
Hello Randall: Honesty has everything to do with this. It wasn't just the stove and fee. The buyer did not believe the verbiage in the contract and he did not believe what I was explaining to him. It was very clear to me there was a trust issue going on. Furthermore, I'm still not certain he truly wants to buy.
Hi Sheila: It is a tactic to weed out those who are not serious. I'd rather find out now than two weeks down the road after the buyer has spent money on a home inspection, paid for an appraisal, and others have expended effort.
Hi Charlie: I always let buyers know they do not "have" to buy a home. Nobody will ever force them to. Sometimes, just realizing that fact, takes the pressure off them. It's stressful to buy a home.
Hi Chris: I agree with you, when the buyer is ready, they don't make unreasonable or goofy requests that can't materialize.
Well done! You are an excellent realtor, and we can all learn from the way you handled this. It's about a business based on a year to year production, and not a deal to deal reaction. Truth always wins!
So what happened?? Did it end??? Did he go through with it??
One of my unpleasant experiences with a buyer dealt with the fact that she wanted to write her own offer. She'd been on the internet and copied something down that was recommended and insisted that she would do her own. Now knowing that a buyer is making a total fool of themselves and not protecting themselves either, it was a farce. She didn't trust me. I didn't want her to get screwed. She didn't buy the house and ended up disliking me. I know that because she went to another agent and said we didn't get along. BUT, that agent didn't seller her anything either.
Elizabeth - I think you handled it very well. Good for you to be able to see through his objections to the main problem. Let us know how this story ends, okay? :)
I am going through that with a seller right now. A few weeks ago I blogged that I was about to FIRE this seller. Time after time he ignores my advice, questions family members then tells me why I am wrong and what he wants me to do instead. Despite rejecting 2 good offers, 2 viable offers in this environment, I held on to him. We got a 3rd good one and he held out for full price. He got it. Now we're in inspection stage and we're going through the I DON'T TRUST YOU deal again. Buyer's inspection found termite evidence. He told me in no uncertain terms there were no termites there. He called hte original inspector out again to re-inspect, and the man explained patiently why he should remediate. He told the seller the exact same thing I did, twice. I advised to treat because the buyer would have a bank problem if we didn't. He argued that he wouldn't treat if he didn't want to. Anyway, after mr inspector talked to him, he sent me a long email explaining that he WOULD treat, but let me know that if I had told him this beforehand it could have saved us all this time and worry. UM, I DID TELL HIM THAT FROM DAY 1. It's like he's throwing it in my face. I am so ready for this deal to close. If it does, I've earned every penny of this commission based on headaches and angry feelings. If it doesn't, I am going to un-list the property.
Hi Li: Not only does truth win, but who wants to work with a buyer who doesn't trust them? OK, some agents don't mind, but I'm not one of those. Some buyers don't trust any agent for any reason, and that's a shame.
Hi Debi: When things don't make sense, there's generally a reason why things don't make sense.
Hi Barbara: Sometimes buyers sabotage themselves. Just because they're waving a checkbook and stroking the granite counters doesn't mean they are a buyer.
A loyal client referred this buyer to me. He refers a lot of doctors to me, and I did NOT want him to feel offended if I discontinued my association with his friend. He was OK with it. So, when the buyer called to hem and haw again, I referred him to another agent in my office.
Hi Erica: Life is too short for headaches. I would not have gotten as far as you in this transaction. I would have cut the strings much sooner. However, not to defend your seller, but he did get his price. It's always up to the client to decide what they want to do; we can't dictate it to them. But if you're not seeing eye-to-eye, that's the time to move on before it gets worse. It rarely gets any better.
I can honestly say that I don't love every buyer and seller but I do adore all my clients, because I select them. LOL. I wouldn't go through hell in an escrow for all the tea in China.
Elizabeth---Bravo! Excellent post! It should be featured!
Many a times I have lost a sale for my honesty--but I believe it's better to lose an offer than to cancel an escrow, better to lose a buyer than to lose a law suit!
"I pride myself on my communication skills, and integrity is my cornerstone in this business" I agree with you! and I am jealous--I wish I had some of your communications skills---I am working on that, but I too pride myself on my integrity!
Thank you for sharing.
The buyer may have just have a case of "cold feet or buyer's remorse!" That is when they start to look for the exit door.
Hi Aida: My communication skills are based in part on the following: I try to explain complex situations in the most simple terms I can muster. If I sense the client is still confused or I'm not getting the response I expect, then I explain it a different way. I keep coming up different ways to say the same thing hoping one of them will make sense, and eventually it does. Then I repeat it several times. :)
Hi Jim: I sense this particular buyer won't buy a home until he finds a seller who says, "Yes, I would love to sell to you, and I accept your offer in its entirety without negotiation." This buyer doesn't like conflict. It makes him uncomfortable. He's methodical and analytical, but he doesn't want the seller to respond in that manner. He wants to be in control. And he's not in control because he doesn't have any money.
He was near contract with another agent on another home that was in probate, but he didn't like the "attitude" of the sellers so he walked away. He also complained about that agent, but I couldn't find anything that agent did that was wrong.
Elizabeth, I thought you took the right approach with the firmness toward the buyer. Look, make a decision and get off the fence. The buyer sounds very picky and immature to me.
I would think a buyer would appreciate the truth, and know that you are not out to just make a commission at their expense.
Elizabeth, yes the seller did get his price, and still it's not enough to make him pleased.
Hi Gary: I don't think he understands the logistics. I predict he will end up in a lousy neighborhood and purchase from a desperate seller now because time is running out for him. At least I won't have the honor of owning that listing when he decides to sell in six months, if you know what I mean.
Hi Sherry: Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth. And that's just too bad.
Hi Erica: Couldn't you pay somebody in your office to take over this file for you to relieve you of the conflict?
Once again Elizabeth, great post. Good for you for giving the buyer the option to walk. You know if he's going to be this difficult at the beginning of the deal, he'll be difficult right up until closing, if it does in fact close.
I had a seller recently who wanted to change verbiage in the standard NCAR Offer to Purchase because their brother the lawyer recommended it. (I represented the buyer). That was kind of the last nitpicking straw i was going to take from this seller and just told the sellers agent we were going to use the standard contract that the Real Estate lawyers wrote for everyone in NC, and if they wanted to change it, my buyers would have their lawyer review it also. Did they want to get into a spitting match with lawyers? Guess what, they took the contract as it was written.
Have a great week!
Elizabeth, I like the way you handled it. I have gone through this a few times in the past myself. Buyers that want to renegotiate the purchase after they have signed the contract and agreed to disclosures and terms. You went above and beyond in dealing with this situation - Is the buyer going to close?
Hi Linda: I can tell you've been around for a while because you're right. It never gets any better and, in fact, it gets worse. So why even bother going there?
Hi Steve: No, the buyer flaked and I referred him to another agent who doesn't mind the drama.
I never did understand why so many people are willing to hide their true feelings, at the detriment of their own sanity. I admire your handling of the client, and I certainly don't consider you to have "strongarmed" him. Our job requires honesty - if he didn't trust you after those words, he never would. We have the right to choose our clients, and we should choose to work with people who want to trust us - we will sell more, in less time.
Hi Scott: Well, he's not my client anymore. But I do have to tell the truth -- not solely because I am required to, either, but as you say, for my own sanity.
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