Home : Blogs : Missy Caulk-Ann Arbor- Realtor(R)- Ann Arbor Real Estate : Ann Arbor and Saline Michigan Real Estate

"The No Spin Zone"

Man Reading Paper Are you who you say you are? When I first started blogging in 2006, it didn’t take long to figure out a few blogging buzz words. One of those words was transparent, or transparency.

Transparency, as used in the humanities, implies openness, communication, and accountability. It is a metaphorical extension of the meaning used in the physical sciences: a "transparent" object is one that can be seen through.

Can your readers see the real you?

Transparency in real life is about Trust.

Transparency in the blogosphere is also about Trust.

Are you who you say you are in your posts?

Are you who you say you are in real life?

Daren Rowse, at ProBlogger says this about transparency… “At the end of the day, trust is the only real currency in the blogosphere, and people who read blogs have the expectation that they’re getting at the truth — in whatever form the truth is to them.” This is a great article on Transparency by Daren Rowse on being a transparent blogger.

Being transparent in your posts and in real life builds trust with your readers and your friends. Think about your friends, do you really call them a friend if they are not open and transparent? I think not, at most they are acquaintances. An acquaintance is a person you knows “about” you, but doesn’t know the real you and vice versa.

Who are you?

Woman Writing Blog post When people read your blog, they want to know about the author. Who are they? What makes them tick? Now, I’m not advocating posting your dirty little secrets on a post or writing a Tell All Book, but there is a balance.

I have had several people ask me in Ann Arbor how I got such a following on Activerain. The answer was I just try to be myself, write from my heart and spend time commenting and getting to know people. The ones that have asked usually only throw up a few posts on non-disclosing subjects, listings, market reports, very safe subjects: yet you don’t learn a thing about them.

N.C. meet up

When I had the opportunity to go to N. Carolina this year with some ladies I met on Activerain, I was not disappointed. Everyone was the same as I expected them to be and we felt like we had known each other for years.

As we walk through shops and restaurants around Ashville, we shared with people that we had met through blogging.

“We’ve never met before”, we said.

Without exception they were stunned.

Agents and friends in my office were amazed.

Who does this?

Hops on a plane to meet people from N.J., Penn, North Carolina, Virginia, W.Virginia that you have never met. What if they had been different? What if they were not who I thought they were? They were not!

Credit for this quote goes to Brian Berlinger as it is one of the best definitions on transparency I have encountered,

“Being truly transparent means that you don’t have to "spin" or pretend to be someone that you aren’t. “It means that people see all sides of you - the good, bad, stupid, and the ugly.”

Transparency is about The good,

The bad, The ugly

At some point in your life, you get to the place where you can confidentially say, “What you see is what you get?” Then you are secure and comfortable enough in your own skin, to be who you are.

Are you what you write?

The more transparent you are in your posts the more people will begin to trust you and start to build relationships with you, the more subscribers you will have, the more business you will have.

School has started across the nation. Soon the kids will be coming home with report cards. What would be on your report card if character was graded? I remember when I was in elementary school at a Catholic Elementary school (Saint Thomas Moore) in Paducah, Ky. We would both the have the academic grades and the character grades?

Transparent………………………….. A B C D F

Truthful and Honest……………. A B C D F

Wouldn’t it be nice if from elementary school on we could still be graded on our character? Perhaps by the time we were adults we would have gotten the message, from the others who know us well.

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.

Watch your words, for they become actions.

Watch your actions, for they become habits.

Watch your habits, for they become character.

Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

Be transparent, Be truthful, Be real…………….

In the end that is all we have is our reputations and the legacy we leave behind both on-line and in real life.

In your blogging, let us see the real amazing YOU, then when we meet face to face there will be no surprises, only friendships that last forever.

Posted by Missy Caulk-Ann Arbor- Realtor(R)- Ann Arbor Real Estate on 09/24/2008 05:31 AM

Comments (111)

The No Spin Zone in the ActiveRain Channel

activerain, blogging, transparency

Post is included in group: Blogging Etiquette 101
Post is included in group: Dedicated Bloggers
Post is included in group: Diary of a Realtor
Post is included in group: POSITIVE ATTITUDE for the Weary Soul
Post is included in group: The Ninety-ninth Percentile

111 Comments on "The No Spin Zone"

SEP

2008

Missy, My Blog is a part of me. My blog is who I am. I have to be transparent in order to continue writing posts after posts on my blog.

No one but me on my blogs... I know what you mean about meeting people you've never met---except through their blogs. I had the most amazing experience of that at INMAN in July. I recognized & hugged so many people that were suddenly so familiar because of AR. It's truly a phenomenon for our times. We are a window to the world that reflects our true character. Thanks for your wonderful post.

Missy...

Very well said! Our Texas group is a shinning example, and what you see on line is what you get in person...except better.

jason

Jason is a a kid at heart and as kind as he seems on line. This is from my slide show that I can't seem to figure out how to get the HTML code to post.....Still working on it, was done is flash slide show & sky album, which I've used before with no problems????

Did you get the message about the Ann Arbor article I told you about? Did you do a post on it, I missed it if you did?

Stay healthy & happy, L

Missy, your advice to "be yourself" is one of the best pieces of advice you can give to any blogger. The veterans here know that already.

Missy... I couldn't agree more. Show people the real you, and that is even when you make mistakes. I love using the phrase, "I am not god, nor am I perfect, but I am damn good... yet, I am human and make mistakes also".... this was a good post. I did something on transparency a few months ago and I think it is an abused word, that is misleading, trying to make that person look good, when they aren't. Just my .02. It's just like the person that uses the terms, "trust me", "I am honest", or "I guarantee"...... good job here, ... I would assume that this could be a featured post... time will tell.

jeff belonger

Missy - this is one of your best articles, IMO. I have no doubt that you are you who say you are in your blogging...I felt that way when we met briefly in SFO at Bloggers Connect. I have found that to be true with everyone that I have met and then met in person (I am almost up to 100 folks now). I love the feedback I get from prosecpts who call me and upon meeting let me know that I am how they expected, and wanted, me to be.

Jeff

Missy, I agree with Jeff above. I think this is one of your most personable and "honest" posts I have ever read. Wow, this lets me in on a side of you I didn't know. It make me like you even more! I guess that's what they mean by "transparency"....right?

Thank you for this post. It's your best! Later in the rain~Deb

Was it Popeye who said, "I yam what I yam and that's all that I yam."

If people write their own blogs, eventually their true personality can't help but show through. I think the only thing that is hidden is their success or level of business. When someone projects themselves to be the 'expert' or "all knowing person", I sometimes look for posts or signs as to whether they have any business. I personally don't want to put much faith into taking advice from someone who doesn't have any real estate business.

Missy, I was having this 'conversation' with a fellow AR blogger yesterday. Our blog has to resonate truth, because if it doesn't then it's just another slick ad that no one will pay attention to. I can't be all things to all people, nor do I have any interest in trying to be. The only difference between my online persona and my real one... I'm much thinner and better looking in person. haha Ok, so I can't even type that with a straight face. LOL This is definitely a feature worthy post if ever I've read one.

SEP

2008

hi Missy, I think it would be tough for anyone to try and "fake it" online for very long and not be found out. We're all too interconnected and someone is bound to destroy the illusion some people try to create for themselves.

Being ourselves is the smart, easy way to go and as you said, it really show up in our blogs & writing. Truly excellent post my friend!

Missy - I can't agree with you more about your message about being transparent (with limits) on your

professional blog. I have adopted a few quotes, one being the one you share in your post.

“What you see is what you get?” another is one I like to share is my own that I like and try to live by,

"So Real, So Right" If you can be real, honest and be consistent in life and your blog writing, life is simple,

don't you agree? I sure missed a great opportunity in NC!

I love transparency and love your post about it. The best part of being myself and transparent (bare naked!) on my own site is when people call or email and say "I love your site and want you to list my house."

Without fail everyone that I have met in real life that I came to know via blogging has been the real deal. When I met you a couple of months ago it felt as if I was talking to an old friend. How rare is that? It shouldn't be rare. It should be the norm if we all are transparent.

Sometimes I get nekkid here on AR (so to speak) That's ok. I'm comfy with who I am and what I am.

Loved this post Missy.

Missy this is a wonderful post, very well stated, and oh so true!

Great post Missy-I tend to agree with you! I have found that I am talking to more and more bloggers on the phone...email and face to face...and fortunately I have been thrilled many are who they portray on line

Well said!!! For the most part I've been thrilled - people I knew through online social media have been what I thought. And that is so the way to be! (Even the ugly parts, lol)

Way to say it, Missy! And I do hope that the run in with non-transparent people - aka liars will be very few and far in between if we have to encounter them at all !!!! ( I<3C )

I agree Missy - good post. It's best to just be yourself and genuine about who you are both online and offline. Readers, buyers and sellers have pretty good radar about that.

Missy - This is a fantastic post! Let YOU come through when you write - it is what pulls the reader in and let's them know you. I have met a few people from AR in person and yes, it was if we already knew each other - no surprises.

Hey Missy,

I love that you did the NC trip ! That is terrific and sounds like an amazing time. I really like what you had to say in the post and I think from some of my comments I am getting the real me across. I love it when someone says I could really hear you or even see you saying that... people that know me say that so I figure those that don't are getting to know me! Anyway have a great day and thanks for encouraging everyone to just be themselves - authentic!

Being transparent is very important and as a relative newcomer to AR, I"m just starting to get comfortable with sharing "who I am" with the AR world. It's daunting to put posts out there and hope that someone will notice them and find them interesting and/or useful. I am starting to understand why people are addicted to AR. If I let a few days go by without posting, I miss the personalities that post here.

It's true that transparency is one of the things that contributes to the relationships many of us have on Activerain. Some people are so good at it - you really get a sense of who they are through their comments, if not their posts.

Missy, integrity and honesty are truly characters which will carry you thru life. I have met that agentfrom AR in person. What a disappointment, I have written on ghost writers in the past. When we met some day we can talk about anything I have posted. It was I, no matter how badly written or short, it was me. What you see is what you get.

A thought provoking post----Gosh, I didn't realize that people have ghost writers producing blogs.

Hi Missy, I try to put at least a little bit of me in all my blogs. When its just statistical information its a bit harder. I totally agree that its important to do this so that people start to feel comfortable with you...know you, like you and thus want to work with you. Thanks for the reminder on this aspect.

Who am I? I am who I am and if they don't like me then they can look for someone else:)

Missy, you've nailed this one and I loved you're story. But I find that the locals or competition as they call themselves don'twant to meet they always say their too busy or what's the point. I have met several while doing seminars around the south and we have had a great time because they don't feel threatened I guess. There are a bunch of us getting together at the NAR convention as well.

Missy,

Your post is a valuable reminder - that's for sure. But, in my case, I don't know how to be anything or anybody other than who I am.

I've always been a "take it or leave it" kind of person -- without being rude about it --- and that seems to have worked for me.

What you see is what you get. It's the only way to be.

Missy, I agree with you that transparency is important and nobody should mask their true selves on the internet. I've yet to be disappointed meeting somebody offline whom I've interacted with online. Most people are true to themselves here in their blogs, though I imagine not everyone.

Missy a very nice explanation of transparency online. It is pretty amazing when you think about the fact that you meet many people from AR and it feels like you have known them for years. One of these days I am going to make one of the connect meetings.

Missy I love this post! I have to say, I haven't met some of my AR friends in person, but I feel as though I know them. I smile when I see their names on comments or in my inbox. I can't wait to hear how they are doing and truly get excited when they succeed.Although it is possible not everyone is "transparent' but those are the people I don't have much of a connection with in the real world either.

I am new to blogging but can see where it could help tell about your personality. Thanks for sharing!

Hi Missy,

This is totally off your subject but one of my business partner here in Green Bay is from Paducah, Kentucky. Once a year or so, Ill go down there with her for a little vacation and to visit. I love that part of the country. When I do, I go to church at St. Thomas Moore. It's a small world, heh!

Take care and have a great Wednesday.

Cindy

Missy you are exactly right! Ans transparant too! In this case it's a good thing. I'm going to meet with an AR friend this weekend. We have hung out twice already. She was exactly like I imagined her to be. This is a great place to make lifelong friends. Hey....you and I need to get together sometime too!

Spot on Missy. Folks can tell a fake from a mile away. It doesn't matter how good of a writer you are if you are not being yourself. Plus it helps to be likeable.

I yam who I yam!!!

I had another agent ask me the other day if he could have someone blog for him? My answer was really a definitive NO!

Missy,

So well written!!!! I connect with like minde folks online who have the character traits I can appreciate way more than any other factor. Some are still good writers, but as far as the real on the blog as if in real life- many times I wonder.- not with you though:-)- I am sure you are the same.

Missy - I am far away from being a good writer, however, what matters most to me online and offline is being "The Woman in Me". I love this blog and a desserving Gold Star.

Missy--I too have met a few AR people and everyone was exactly as expected. I follow their blogs because of the connection and I hope that clients find me for the same reason. You have to be who you are and that has to come through in your posts or blogging doesn't work.

Missy that is some excellent advice...one of the things I share with others when they start blogging is that they need to allow people to get to know them...that is what starts the relationship!

Missy - I agree 100%. I don't know how meny realtors I've met who show their true colors in person, but you would never guess talking on the phone, or ready their e-mails. I hopefully don't have any of those type of problems.

Thanks for this topic. I am still watchful of the line between what I consider to be professional and what is un-professional in my words and actions. The more I am around a client, the more I can be myself, but I always worry about going too far. I can be really obnoxious and many people like that about me. However, I am not sure where the line is sometimes with clients. Many of my clients enjoy my sense of humor, but they still expect results. My blog also lets me express myself, i.e. transparent. Good discussion, thanks for bringing it up.

Missy, Very well done and well writtten! Of course, meeting you in NC was such fun...you are just as energetic, dynamic and fun with a good twist of a serious love of real estate that makes you so special. I always tell anyone who asks me about how to blog that first and foremost the must be themselves.

Hi Missy. I think I am myself?? Probably too transparent but I just love it.

Thanks again for writing,

Ken

Missy - this post made me smile. I am enjoying being a part of this community more everyday. Thanks for the great advice and for caring so much.

Missy - I don't see how else you can blog but by being transparent.

Missy, that was the best translation of transparency I've read. And how true that is. It also is an excellent demonstration of the feeling we get when we finally get to meet each other face to face.

As usual, a great post Missy! I am getting to a point in my own blogging where the norm just isn't cutting it anymore. I want to take my writing to a new level. I think your post is going to help me. Perhaps I need to be a little more transparent... Thanks!

Missy, this is just one of the best ever...you raised the bar on this one. I'm like all pumped for the day. This is so inspiring and while I struggle to have people understand what blogging is all about...I am now going to email this post to them to help them.....WOW! Thanks for the great work. We're all inspired!

Thank you for a great post - and for clearing up the "transparent" phrase for me. On my first blog - one of the comments said that I definately was Transparent - and at first I was a little offended. Thinking it meant that I had an obvious angle and was being fake. But now I see it is one of the best compliments I could have recieved :) Thanks again!

Missy - I really enjoyed this post. I was surprised to see Liz's picture of me above. I knew I shouldn't have worn those glasses during our gathering. But seriously, everyone that I have had the pleasure of meeting from AR in person is exactly as I expected, and I hope they feel the same way about me. As you know, I am very open about my life and my experiences. I guess the next frontier for me is video!

Missy - this is great advice, and a good reminder when writing - to let your own self shine through so tht people get to know you.

I don't even know how to be anyone but myself!

Missy,

It's easy to see why this is a feature. I think there is a natural procession in blogging, from finding your voice to being able to be true to yourself in the day to day and on the web. So it's good to remember that your words will define you whether you intended them to or not.

Missy - Just because I wholeheartedly agree, doesn't make this post anything less than an amazing example of how to succeed in the blogosphere. Be yourself. If transparency is about the good, bad, & the ugly... I think I've shown all sides;-) Very well put, Missy.

Missy! I completely love this post and appreciate you opening the subject up to discussion. I am pretty much exactly who I am and (sometimes there is less than meets the eye) Something that is funny to me is that many people often tell me that I actually look like my picture too (though usually less formal). The most important aspect though is that a person needs to demonstrate by actions the words they speak AND post!

Good reminder, people will expect you are who you say you are when they meet you anyway!

great points, thank you

Missy,

Being who you really are ALL the time is the only way to live.

"......Then you are secure and comfortable enough in your own skin, to be who you are."

That's a tough one for a lot of people. I know I struggle with it sometimes. Thanks for the reminder Missy.....sometimes I feel like your blogs really talk to me (and that's the truth) ;-)

Thanks for taking the time to put together such a well thought-out post, Missy! I wish every REALTOR in North America could read and adopt these principles as their own. Actually, I think most of us do try to adhere to them overall, but there's always room for improvement.

Missy, you said so much in this post and it is all true. In fact, blogging is an opportunity to express our true selves and that is a priveledge that cannot be wasted in being someone that we are not on the heart level. Thanks for putting it into words.

I've always been me, but it took years and a progression of baby steps before being comfortable sharing me, but I am HERE. This is ME. Take it or leave it -- whatever!

Thank you, Missy for expressing this vital concept so well.

Missy, this is a great post - and certainly worthy of a feature. :)Sometimes on the 'net it's easy for people to try and be something they are not.

There are AR members who say that real estate professionals waste their time talking in the I sense when they should be focusing their blogs on business and real estate trends, the marketplace, etc. Althought I somehow agree, blogging is what makes the individual and should include all types of topics and subjects so that the real personality comes out.

I use a combination of everything, from local news, images, information, to humor and the I sense, after all, our personalities shine in our blogs and should be used for us and not against us. So, go ahead and blog and let your personalities sparkle.

We are living in the communications era and real estate consumers are using the internet to shop for homes more than ever. Our blogs help us to transpire the uniqueness of our blogs, personalities, websites and marketing strategies. There have been many success stories with AR bloggers and how a real estate consumer found them. No need to be fake or transparent - just be yourself!

I think being transparent is a good thing, but there are those who wish to cloud any transparency with talk or gossip non-sense under the radar in an effort to discredit individuals, or their ideas.

That's a shame, because then these "high and mighties" are really the one's who are not showing their true colors.

I know who I am, and I am pretty much comfortable in my own skin. I believe in Capitalism with a Conscience. I do business with everyone the way I want to be treated. That includes co-operating brokers.

Being yourself is great. Being respectful no matter what you know or think you know about another person is better.

Well, my friend, 'real' is all I have. I don't own any masks...don't want to own any. I suppose that I am very fortunate that my mother taught me these lessons a long time ago. What we learn as a child often becomes the foundational 2x4s of our lives. YOU are one of the most real and transparent people I know...online or otherwise. GBU, Missy!

Mana,I know you are that's why I follow you, you rock !

Mara, I am so disappointed we didn't get to meet at Inman, are you going in January?

Liz, I did get your email and I had already found it on the internet before the article was published and posted on it. Chris Griffith in Bonita Springs had sent it to be via Twitter.

Gary, you are right about the Veterans here..LOL

Jeff B, it was !!

Jeff D. that's why they trust you, they already know you. The 2 go hand in hand,

Deb, why thank you mame!

Elaine, that is an excellent point, I was going to give a referral out for someone in one of the states and that person said no, they had already checked and the person, although blogged alot didn't do that much RE.

Jessee, you crack me up. It is good to laugh at ourself, isn't it.

marti, thanks my friend back at ya.

Candace, we missed you, next time, OK

Susie, I love those phone calls !

Kris, I know I felt the same way, didn't want to spend time yaking with new folks just YOU, who I was so already connected too.

Gail,thanks.

Midori and you even call us from jail. MDA Jail.

Kim, what's the acromonym mean, I'm tired can't figure it out.

Judy, we all have the radar, some use it better than others.

Leesa, love your new photo, thanks for stopping by.

Shannon, authenticity and transparancy go hand in hand.

Colleen, just keep it up, being yourself is how you will get folks to follow you.

Margaret, we all grow in our writing ability, the more we do it, the more honest we can become.

Frank, hey you love football like I do, that's enough for me. Sorry you had a disappointing experience.

Diane, some folks do if they are too busy to post, but it is a small, small minority.

MidTown Direct Realtor, well it is harder on market reports but I only do mine once a month so no bigging, they are for the consumer anyway.

Neal, you ARE THE REAL DEAL, and we all know it.

Charles, I think some agents are just too competitive in their local area. See you at NAR at the AR party.

Carol, I love that quote, "what you see is what you get". I learned a long time ago that some folks like me and others don't. I've told my kids that all their lives. As they grow older they understand, but it takes time, especially with girls.

Brian, me either especially when they do video's like George Washington.

Bill, take a break from all your social networking and listings and come. Well worth it.

Cherimie, ha, I smile too !

Norma, good glad I could help. Remember people here and consumers want to know you, then you will connect and all is good.

Cindy, oh my I love reading your comment, wow it is a small world. I have to say I have not been back since my mom died. But soon I've been craving bar b que and there is none better than Starnes. Make sure you go.

Liz, I so want to meet you too. We will I know.

Bryant, been thinking of you and TLW. Now how did you do that graph, too cute. Of course you are who you are and that is why are you are so loved and followed. The one and only you.

Garren, good I would have answered the same, but if they do use a ghost writer they still need to add a paragraph or two and let us see them.

Rebecca, I'm laughing, it is not hard to find a fake is it.

Petra, thanks no worries you are real and I hope to meet someday.

Teri, exactly I do the same thing,

Jeremy, ditto

Larry, this was my point, be real, be who you are. Maybe it is a Southern thing?

Brien, we all feel each other out, we know when we can let loose and show our personalities. Some clients are just into finding the house, very serious and we relate to them as professionals. Others we connect with instantly and they become our clients for life.

Diane, that was the best trip I had all year. It was fun, and we learned so much about each other were able to joke and carry on. I want a trip #2 to Mexico. LOL

Ken, I appreciate your honesty. You are very transparent, the good the bad the ugly you are not afraid to show yourself and that is good.

Ann, well gee thanks, glad it helped, Activerain is extremely addicting.

Sandra, not sure how to answer, I do see folks here who write a ton, but I have no clue who they really are.

Gena, the good definations were from ProBlogger and Brian Berlinger. They said it better than I ever could.

Emily, hey girl that's exciting. Time to go to the next level, I'll be watching.

Jeanean, thanks makes me :), I shared at a KW event yesterday in Ohio. It pumped me up for blogging, I hadn't done a post on it for a long time. Glad it helped, yee haw...

Shaun, that's funny, I made mistakes too. But, now you can feel better, it WAS a great compliment,

Jason, honestly you are the most transparent on here, and that's why I love and follow you. Heck I'll probably dance at your kids wedding, if I'm not in a walker. LOL

Cat, it is our online legacy, so yes they will define us. Not only blogging but in real life. I wish this was invented earlier so it could be a real life story in print for my kids and grandkids.

Kelly, of course you are as I hope to meet one day.

Jason, you have and that's why we love Ya !

Bob, thanks for stopping by, always makes me smile when a AR dude comments on my posts. Notice I call ya'll dudes and not gods?

Dave, you're very welcome.

Russell, The most important aspect though is that a person needs to demonstrate by actions the words they speak AND post! I agree.

kathi, nice to hear from you, how is our book coming along ? Need an update.

Elaine, baby steps is how we all learn to blog. yep you're always real.

Missy, I was smiling as I was reading this....I loved it! I have definitely shown ALL sides of myself :) Some people say that's not such a good idea but it's the very thing that makes client's connect with you. Wonderful post and well deserved feature!

Kristina, exactly my point.

Diana, most of the news journalist now have blogs and twitter. I love following them and having an honest communication.

Ruthman, very true, respect is a by product of being honest and disagreeing with a loving heart.

Elizabeth and I say all that right back to you.

Carole, my friend you do it all right and no doubt when we meet you will be the person I have known through activerain.

Hi Missy, Although I've logged off, I wanted to stop by to say how much I appreciated this post when I read it earlier in the day. Everytime that I've met individuals from Active Rain, it's been a delight. I'm glad that I got to meet you in GR. You're even more fun than I imagined. :)

Missy - What a wonderful Post. I too, am what I portray on my Blog. It's the real me. Like it or leave it.

Missy, I have been able to meet quite a few of my fellow rainers and you are right it was like we already knew each other.

Missy - I definitely allow who I am to shine. People get to see all of me - the good, the bad, the ugly, the stupid (although I prefer not to use any of that because they are all merely judgments and assessments of actions and do not define "me") That's another topic.

Missy - that's what I have loved about being here. The people I'm drawn to write in such a conversational way that I quickly feel like a real friend to them, like I know them! It's the wierdest thing but I could totally see me meeting some AR friends I've never met before and when we met it would be like we were old friends :)

Or maybe it's just that all us bloggers have the same personality...........

So, Missy... you've met me. Most of the time people think I'm nicer in person... What does that say?

Like most things in life we can't hide the truth. Do what comes naturally.

Missy: Wonderful post and well deserved Feature!

I think it's great that you've had opportunities to meet others in the AR community and that you had such great connections you were ready made friends!

Sharing of yourself and being real is what will build life long relationship with others. :-)

All the Best!

SEP

2008

Missy - It is key to being successful, you certainly don't want the consumer to be in shock when they meet you in person.

Missy- beautifully written. If we are able to transcend our words and be real people as you said, we are able to touch the lives of others in some special way. Your post was eloquent, precise and precious.

Missy: Great post. I have watched a few local agents reinvent themselves on their blog, and be something they are certainly not perceived as locally or in their own office. It's been completely fascinating to watch one local, very unpopular agent become the queen of the ball in AR. I've been amazed.

Mike, that's why I check out the other places on the web where people are before I refer based on their amounts of postings, top positions here.

Allison, thanks glad you stopped by.

Jennifer, shock ? That's funny, that's why I changed my photo. LOL

therese, that's one reason I love meeting you and Lola in GR.

Lane? you write with authority? yea, your pretty darn nice in person.

Lola, OK it has been over a year, so time to get together again. Actually a AR meet up or a Twitter one would be good.

Missy - Transparency is a bit like truth in advertisement ... and many of us have updated our mug shots here on active/rain to reflect the real us

Great post! I completely agree that this is something we all need to strive for. Thanks for reminding me to show that I am a "real person"!

Great Photo. I try hard to be who I am everyday but I need to work on the days I'm not sure who I am.

Hi Missy,

Late as usual...the buzz here at AR is loud! I guess you hit a nerve being transparent. Good for you and such a true and open post!

Dick Beals

It's obvious that you are doing a lot of things right, Missy! Thanks for sharing your 'secret' with us!

SEP

2008

I'm not following you on this one. I don't want to be transparent. I hear kids all the time say, "He's sooooooooooooooooo transparent." I also remember when I was very young and had been bad, and was lieing about being bad, my mom would say, "I can see right through you."

I don't want to be transparent. I want people to see the full me, even if they think I'm rull of *#^$#& because they don't like my politics, or religion, or sexual orientation. At least they always know where I stand. That's not transparent or transparency as I see it.

Jim, did you really read her post? I hate when people just slap up comments to get points. That's really transparent.

Oh, contraire, bison breath (with apologies to Johnny Carson). I not only read the whole post, and disagree with it, I even subscribed to notifications.

Here's the part that I just really am having trouble with:

Being transparent in your posts and in real life builds trust with your readers and your friends. Think about your friends, do you really call them a friend if they are not open and transparent?

I just disagree, but we can agree to disagree.

I think there is a significant difference between "seeing the real you" and "seeing right through you."

Even around the coffee table, donuts table, and water jug at work, agents are always saying, "She's sooooooooo transparent. I can see right through her and what she's trying to do." That's not me; no transparency here.

I hate it when people make presumptions about other people. Now THAT'S transparent! Instead of making such a derogatory comment, you should engage the other person, even perhaps by private email, and find out about them. Then, after you're determined whether they truly are transparent or open, you can make derogatory comments. For example, I think John McCain and Sarah Palin are transparent. LOL

Mike thanks for the defense.I don't think he understood the post or the word in the way it was defined.

Jim, in this post transparency is a good thing, being open, honest, trustworthy. Presumptions about a person is not being transparent it is a presumption. My point is that through blogging we can get to know someone if they share a little of who they are, then friendships are made. Blogging gives us a platform to show who we are to future clients. So when we meet them in real life they are who they said they were.

Yes I'm real, the comedy seeking smart ass that I am. I had one client tell me that I practice the "Maxine" or "Emma Bombeck" version of real estate. She like it.

Hey, Missy.

I know how you meant it to be, and although I appreciate you trying to redefine a word that has a historically different meaning—and good luck with that—I can't buy into it.

My Partner and I often get accused of being transparent because we both love sharing stories about ourselves, and we have lots of stories about lots of things because we both have an intense interest in life and all that it provides to us. Usually people only have stories about a couple of things—their family, their business, their dogs and cats, etc. I like real estate because it actually gives me the opportunity to use my varied interests to break the ice with people. As my Partner and I often tell our Clients, "I know something about everything and everything about nothing, so if you need an expert in any area, that's not me."

So while I appreciate your post, I just can't agree with the definitions or some of the wording you used. That's why I subscribed to comment notifcation, though. I want to hear what others have to say.

Lyn, I love her Erma and Maxxine, so you must be a fun in person if you are like her.

SEP

2008

Missy, Thank you for your thoughtful commentary. I've always associated "being transparent" as a negative quality, but you have defined it in a totally different light.

These were my favorite words from your post. Are they from a quote?

Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

Thanks again, Holly

Hi Missy - I am who I am, in my blogs and in person! I've had the great opportunity, several times, to have met some great AR folks, and most were exactly who they are here. When consumers and other members meet us, they know right away whether we're real or not.

I can't remember the exact words, but there's a saying that many should pay heed to - be careful of the words you use, you never know which ones you'll have to eat.

Ann

SEP

2008

Like my friend Cyndee Haydon says, this is your on-line resume.

My personal beliefs are that people are looking for the "you' behind the words that you are typing.

I just wish more people would figure this out. And too many people waste too much time worrying about what people think of them. Just be who you are!

Hi Missy-

Thanks for shaing. Your content is alway on point and timely. Blogging is no different than working with a client. If you're sincere it will show up as caring & professional...and if not, you'll be exposed. Greetings from Paradise.

Missy that was the best advice I received when I first started blogging and it's so true. Great blog!

How can we not be who we are? If we aren't then we won't have a voice. We have to be ourselves! It's taken me a while to find my voice - I came from corp am but a real estate background and I know how to market - just finding "my own voice" has been my biggest challenge.

Excellent post. We must be genuine if we expect to have longterm impact.

SEP

2008

I can definitely see that those who have a huge following on ActiveRain are those we trust, are genuine and a generous contribution to this community and I am sure all they belong to. For some reason, I still try too hard to have the right post, to be the contribution that so many people are and don't write from my heart. Maybe this is part of the journey of becoming a blogger. But then I am very results oriented in my day to day life but know I care deeply about my friends, family and my clients--and those like you Missy who take the time to read my posts.

OCT

2008

There have been times that I have thought I was too transparent. When a client that I have never met, knows my kids names, my wife's name and what we did on vacation.

But, then when they say they hired me because we had something in common, I think, that is why I am transparent!

OCT

2008

Missy, How in the world did I miss this post? This is a fantastic topic, and about something that I am seeing more and more of lately ~ namely, ghost writing. To each his own, but I am drawn to member's topics and posts that are personal and not just words on a page. I can't believe it's taken me this long to subscribe to you. Where have I been all this time?

Leave a response…

Name:

Email:
(optional)

Comment:

What does the graphic say?