
Some years ago, I was working with a buyer who wanted an older, brick home...something that was structurally sound but cosmetically challenged. I had no trouble finding 10 or 12 options in his designated area and price range.
Determined to see ALL of the homes in one day, we began our journey with a certain vigor. The first two homes were okay...but my buyer wanted a big backyard...which neither had. The third home was tenant-occupied and appeared to have severe water damage to the foundation sill. Moving on to the fourth home, my client was really excited.
From the MLS pictures and description, home #4 seemed to be the perfect home for my client. It was a 1960's brick Ranch, with three bedrooms and two baths. It had hardwood floors throughout and a large, eat-in kitchen. Best of all, the home was situated on an almost .75 acre wooded lot...just a few miles from downtown Raleigh. My buyer was convinced that...after seeing home #4...his search would be over. I was equally hopeful.
Pulling into home #4's long driveway, I immediately sensed that something was not quite right. I grabbed the MLS sheet...to verify that I was at the right house. YES...it was the correct address...but it was definitely NOT the same home...or was it?
The MLS sheet showed a well-maintained brick home with a nicely manicured lot. With overgrown bushes and tall weeds for a lawn...this home appeared to have been abandoned for years. There was something else missing...or added. In the MLS photo, you could clearly see the whole front of the home...with only one small tree in front of the bedroom window. That ‘small tree' had grown a little since the MLS photo had been taken...about 35 or 40 feet to be more specific. It was so large, in fact, that the whole side of the house was hidden.
Somewhat speechless, we made our way up the front steps and into the front door. Pausing in the doorway, I could hardly believe my eyes. The gorgeous hardwood floors (from the photos) were partially torn up...leaving exposed beams and holes to the basement below. There was garbage and debris scattered from one end of the home to the other...with at least 10 bags of garbage stacked in the kitchen area. Most of the windows in the home were cracked or completely missing, and the ceiling was falling down throughout the home. The dated appliances were nowhere to be found, and the bathrooms had NO TOILETS. There was nothing (ABSOLUTELY NOTHING) about the house that even remotely matched the pictures in the MLS. As you can imagine, home #4 was a huge disappointment and a complete waste of our time.
Driving to the next listing, I gave Mr. Listing Agent a call about home #4...but he must have been too busy falsifying information in the MLS to take my call. I did leave him a ‘sweet' message...asking for a return call at his earliest convenience. Two days later, he had still not found a convenient time to call me back...so I called him again...leaving another ‘sweet' message...

"Hi Mr. Listing Agent, this is Elizabeth Nieves AGAIN. I showed your listing on Liars Lane the other day, and I am calling to report that someone has broken in and vandalized your listing. You need to get over there right away, because the damage is extensive. They have torn up the beautiful, hardwood floors. The appliances are missing. There is garbage everywhere, and they EVEN stole the toilets! OH...they did leave one clue behind. I think the vandals are landscapers, because...after they totally trashed the house...they planted a 40 foot tree in the front yard. Have a wonderful day!"

The Moral of the story:
'FLUFF' is the 'STUFF' in the middle of an oreo cookie.
THIS IS MISREPRESENTATION!
Rule #1 (of Elizabeth's R.E. Rule Book) ***NO NAKED PEOPLE ALLOWED TO 'POP OUT' DURING SHOWING***
Rule #2 (of Elizabeth's R.E. Rule Book) ***NO! YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE A R.E. LICENSE IF YOU CAN'T COUNT!***
Rule #3 (of Elizabeth's R.E. Rule Book) ***IF YOU WANT ME TO SELL YOUR LISTING...I HAVE TO BE ABLE TO SHOW IT!***
Rule #4 (of Elizabeth's R.E. Rule Book) ***TO ALL LISTING AGENTS: PLEASE GIVE ME SOME WARNING THAT YOUR SELLER IS INSANE***
Rule #5 (of Elizabeth's R.E. Rule Book) *** F.S.B.O. does NOT stand for material (F)ACTS (S)HOULD (B)E (O)PTIONAL! ***

Written and Posted by:
Elizabeth Nieves - Broker, REALTOR®
The Elizabeth Nieves Realty Group @ Keller Williams (A Bilingual Real Estate Team serving Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill NC and surrounding areas.)
Search Raleigh, Durham, Chapel Hill and ALL Triangle Homes for Sale
Hi Elizabeth ... LOVE the new picture. Good choice. I'm sorry, but I'm laughing here, at this story. I know it wasn't funny for you at the time, but what else can you do with listing agents like this? You did good girl!