Was speaking to a Women's Real Estate Organization recently where I told the story of the agent who approached me at a networking event, poked his card out at me, and asked me if I knew anyone who wanted to buy a house.  It was so rude and so wrong, that I used it as a springboard to explain how hard selling is perceived by a potentially excellent referral source.  

But let's get beyond the desperate agent's wrong stuff and talk about what he should have done right.

He should have:

a)  Gotten to know me a little better.   A referral (especially one with such a big pricetag) is a gift.  I don't give a gift that big without feeling some kind of connection with someone. 

b)  Let me know something more about himself than his occupation.  Who is he really and what makes him interesting (if he is at all).

c) Waited to ask for a referral.  By shooting the request right away, he proved that his only interest in ne is what I could do for him.

d)  Should have looked for the gap --where he could help me first.  By finding out what's going on with me where he might help, he makes a "deposit" in the bank, so to speak.  That gap could be helping with a job lead, an introduction, a piece of useful information about an event, hobby club, etc.

e)  Followed up.  Should have e-mailed me a few days later with a "nice to have met you" or "let's do coffee sometime -- I'd like to hear more about what you do."  Would have gotten my attention.

And, here's the biggie!  He should know who his ideal client type is and be able to articulate that when the time comes.  Rare is the occasion that we run across someone who "wants or needs to buy a house."  But, I would likely know people who would qualify as his ideal client type.  For instance, if he were interested in young, active families who are neighborhood types with two ore more kids advancing into middle school over the next couple of years, then I might be able to help.  It's all about relationship building in advance of need. 

So, get out there and find the gap....and please don't make this guy's mistake.  I gave out 3 referrals to agents that week.  He lost me by simply showing lack of care.