Acorns Across America -- Whatcom County Votes 2008

I had been putting off voting so got the ballot out this morning. I marked it and hopped in the truck to take it to the courthouse. Boy, there were people with signs there telling me to simply drop it off from my open window. Simply take a left turn on a street that is normally blocked off and drop off your ballot. The photo below shows the first such sign, indicating a turn is in order.  

Once you make the turn, you see the sight below. This is, at least I hope, election workers who take your ballot.  If not, then I guess I did not vote!

So I am going through, dropping off my ballot, with these mysterious people whom I assume to be election workers. As you would expect, my home inspector assistant Nutsy is perched on the back of the seat. When I gave my ballot to the guy collecting them, another person, a woman, at the other side says: "Hey, how come there are two guys in the truck but only one of you is voting?"

I told the lady that even though Nutsy is high-functioning, he is still a squirrel and he probably is not eligible to vote. The lady then flashed an ID card, showing she was from an organization called "Acorn" and he was just EXACTLY the kind of disenfranchised voter that she and Acorn were looking for. She had a few questions to see if he met the criteria of being a voter. For example, was he born in the USA? That was simple, he was born in a maple tree on Maple Street. So that answer was "yes." And she asked when he was born and she converted his squirrel years into people years and confirmed that he is of voting age and qualified to vote in this election.

The next part was a little harder for Nutsy to figure. This Acorn lady wanted to see a photo ID. We had two choices. We could have shown her the one below, but decided it might give someone the idea he had suspicious middle eastern ties. In fact, this is his anti-terrorist French Foreign Legion officer's outfit but most people do not know that.

Rejecting that one, without showing it, we then pulled out the next photo.  This one, taken recently, shows Nutsy as a regular working guy -- certifried home inspector assistant. The lady said that this photo was perfect and that he is, for certain, exactly the kind of voter she was looking for. I think it possible that Nutsy might become the poster boy for Acorn.

So, to make a long story short, thanks to this group called Acorn, Nutsy voted too. I saw him mark his ballot and I think that, had they known, they might not have wanted him voting at all. With his military background, he is much more conservative than one might expect. In instances where he could, he voted straight libertarian. That Nutsy is a squirrel who is not easily stereotyped.

Steven L. Smith

Bellingham WA Home Inspections