'Time outs' for me these days involve  sitting amongst packed boxes andSwans in Port Credit Harbour, Ontario piles of 'giveaways', 'for sales', 'recyclables', 'for the shredder' and 'for the curb' items.

I never realized that preparation for moving can be so emotionally taxing.
I'll now have much greater empathy for my clients as they prepare for their moves and sort through the years of their lives deciding what to keep and what should be let go of.

Our lives are like shooting stars. They go by so fast.
It's strange how the static objects in our lives, those things that don't change, serve as guideposts to where we've been and what's been lost along the way.

They say you can never go back and I'm beginning to understand that more and more as I prepare to leave the life I have here behind and begin anew elsewhere.

Daily I am approached by people who come up to me with sorrowful faces who say things like:

"I hear you're leaving us."

"Yes, at the end of the month."

"Well that's great for you but not so great for us. We're going to miss you."

and

"So you're moving away! I'm devastated to hear this. I've had my two hour cry and consulted my therapist over the fact that you're moving."

"I'm really feeling sad over the fact that you're moving away. In fact, I'm feeling sadder every day about this."

"You're what!?! You're moving away? WoW! I'm going to miss you terribly."

"I'm very disappointed to hear that you're moving. We're going to miss you."

and so on.

At these tiPresqu'ile Boardwalk~ Brighton Ontariomes, I begin to realize that the old 'cup in a bucket of water analogy' is really false afterall.
We all DO matter and we all do make a difference in the lives of others. And no, we are not replaceable.

We are each unique and fill a place in the lives of others that only we can fill.
Once the cup of our lives is taken out of their bucket, that bucket will never be the same again.

There's one problem though.
It slowly becomes very apparent to me that the bucket of my life is being severely depleted as I am losing the cups that represent so many people all at once, and this can become very overwhelming as it rips an ever deepening tear in the very heart of my being.

If you're not careful to say goodbye slowly and adjust to the loss of each person from your life, all of these goodbyes can become immobilizing.
Sure, you'll stay in touch. You'll visit, you'll email and you'll sometimes call; however no matter what, you know in your heart that things will never be the same.

Somewhere, in and around the Burlington, Ontario area, there are many people who will soon be adding a unique and beautiful cup 'of their life' to the new bucket of my life that I'll soon be filling.
Even this knowledge though, does not compensate for those I'm leaving behind.

As I experience this slow disentangling from my life here, an old post I wrote c Sherkston Shores~Lake Erie, Ontario, Canadaomes to mind and these words I wrote ring loud and clear deep within the raw and saddened places of my being:

"Your soul is a child. It is the first to wander off and trust. The first to fall in love with an idea, a view or a person. The last to forget. It is the part of you that tags behind and pulls with a steadiness as it cries to you ‘no, wait, wait, I am not ready to say goodbye . Can’t we just stay a bit longer?’

Your soul is innocent. It lives in a different world than you. A different dimension. It will never understand the harsh events of your life nor the negative character traits of the people you come across. This is not a part of your soul’s vocabulary.

Your soul is blind
. Your soul is only love. It is the dancing child within you. The one who calls to you to look up and see that last mauve cloud move briskly across the clearing sky after a downpour.

It is the one who understands what an old dog is saying as his eyes gently and humbly meet yours and something within you softly moves.

Your soul will feed itself. It only asks that you prepare a small corner table in a quiet courtyard where flower petals fall softly to the stones below and your face can be caressed by the shifting whimsy of a gentle breeze.

Then it asks that you take a seat in the remaining old wrought iron chair and listen to what it has to say."

Lately I've been drinking a lot of that old, mellowed brew that my soul serves up each time I sit down to lend an ear to what it wants to tell me.

The stories it tells me these days are often sad ones for you see, it longs to linger behind with those people and days it's grown attached to, while the rest of me moves on.

Well, I guess I better finish this last drop of tea my soul served up this morning and get back to sorting through those tangible pieces of my life.
The intangibles my soul yearns to deal with will have to wait for another day.

Perhaps tomorrow.

 

©2008JoSmith


 

Jo-Anne Smith, the author of this article, is a REALTOR® with Summit Group-Quantum Realty Inc, Brokerage, in Oakville, Ontario and welcomes your real estate inquiries. To contact her, visit www.Oakville-BurlingtonHomes.com

Jo-Anne Smith, the author of this article, is a REALTOR® with Your Choice Realty , Burlington, Oakville and  Mississauga, Ontario and welcomes your real estate inquiries. To contact her by email: Email Jo-Anne Smith

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52 Comments on The Reluctant Vagabonds We Harbour Within.

20 Most Recent Comments Displayed Show All

NOV
21
2008
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

hi Trace!

Thank you for your insight and support, as always. Everything does change, and I guess when we're not there to change alongside of it, we grow apart from people and places. I believe though, with effort, we can maintain a certain semblance of closeness and attachment if we really care and desire to.

I tend to hang on to 'things' if they have some sentimental value to me....and therefore I have a lot of STUFF! Seems I can attach sentimental value to almost anything....    (((-:

Actually, I'm not too bad....although I do still have a lot of my son's schoolwork from when they were little. Heck, I even have a few notebooks of my Dad's from when he was a little gaffer attending grade school!

Life....

((-:

Jo

4:38am • #33
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Gary,

Thank you kindly...the feeling is mutual. ((-:

I'm moving because my sons are grown and gone now, and it's time to move back to a larger centre (the area I'm moving to is the fastest growing area in Ontario)....also, many of the people I'm closest to, family and friends, live there. I'll be staying in the real estate field though...that's not going to change.

((-:

Jo

10:08am • #35
NOV
22
2008
878,908 Points 10 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Jo -  As one door closes another will open ... as we pass through the portals of life our soul sometimes drags its heals ... it is buried in the comforts and familiarity of the past. Once it steps through into the light it warms to the new existence and retains the memories of the past as a place of solace and comfort whenever we need it.

2:00pm • #36
1,326,575 Points 187 Featured Posts Outside Blog Attended Rain Camp Called Shot Master

Very cool Jo. It sounds like the new change will allow business to grow faster and on the personal side you'll be more in the center of friends and family. I wish you well. Sometimes change is just so invigorating for us even though as we get older it seems we resist it a bit too much. I think the key to a youthful mind is always to have an open mind.

3:22pm • #37
NOV
24
2008

Hi Jo,

I am the same way, when it is time to let something go.... I can't friendship or stuff. So I have a few large plastic bins that I but stuff in, treasures from when my kids were little, from when I was little and store it....for what I don't know. I have my barbies and all their clothes from when I was little, I have my girls barbies!! I still have a bunch of my kids baby clothes!! But it is all tucked away in my memory bins. Notice how I said bins....that's right there is a few of them in the storage room. One day my kids will have to go through it and then they will either start their own memory bin or through it away, that way I don't have to.....smart plan?!! I know that when I moved it goes by weight so I did get rid of a lot of things that I wish I didn't.

2:53pm • #38

Beautifully written and inspirational - just what I needed today.

8:35pm • #39
NOV
29
2008
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Kathy,

Sorry to be replying to you so late...I've been in the midst of my move all this past week (final trip (with regards to the move) to Belleville today to tie up some loose ends...

How far are you from Burlington? I'd love to get together with you sometime before Christmas...or in the near New Year.

It is strange how our souls drag their heels, isn't it? Sometimes mine just digs in to the ground below and refuses to budge, like a child throwing a pouting session.

((-:
Jo

6:22am • #40
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Gary,

Yes, I agree with you about having an open mind...also, I believe that once you've made a decision, you should not look back. Just focus on the future and enjoy the adjustment.

Thanks for visiting!

Jo

6:24am • #41
116,681 Points

Jo - Kathy and I are about 1-1/2 to 1-3/4 from Burlington, touch base with her by email to set something up.

2:52pm • #42
NOV
30
2008
310,127 Points 19 Featured Posts Outside Blog Called Shot Master

Jo, Once again I decided to look for you and find you are now moving! I suspect I have missed way too much and I am sorry about that.  I know exactly how you feel about leaving and attaching sentiment to things. I am a New Englander and you may have heard that we all do that here. 

Selfishly, it's nice to know you won't be leaving "us"!!!   Also, as I know you are already aware, there is more than one reason for your move, so look forward to the new and meaningful relationships you are about to encounter. Don't be sad, although I have to say, sadness in you tends to make your writing even more eloquent than it was..If that is possible. 

I wish, right now, that I had your gift of writing so I could make you feel better. But, I do not, so all I can say is my thoughts are with you. I expect to be reading happy posts from you shortly. Take care, friend.

6:26pm • #43
DEC
02
2008
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Trace,

Please forgive me for taking so long to reply to your comment. I've been in the midst of the final leg of my move and also choosing a new office to work for, etc.

I love your idea of 'memory' bins. Are they those big plastic bins? I think I should go through all of the many boxes I have of my son's stuff and make up a bin for each of them...then some day when they are settled down in one spot for good, they can pick up their bin, and like you said, go through it and see what they want to save.

I believe you're sentimental like myself....I tend to hang on to everything that holds a special memory. This makes a LOT of stuff to move when re-locating.

How's the snow situation where you are?

Jo

6:54pm • #44
DEC
03
2008
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

hi Karen,

It's wonderful to hear from you and thank you so much for your beautiful comment....

I can imagine New Englanders being very sentimental, much like the maritime provinces of Canada. It might be due to the abundance of Irish blood in those regions...we Irish are a very sentimental bunch. Remember that old saying 'tortured Irish soul'? I think that has to do with the ache we feel about so many things in life....like moving away from an area we've lived in many years.

I hope things are going well in your corner of the world....

((-:

Jo

6:40pm • #46
DEC
09
2008

Hi Jo,

Oh don't worry about being late getting back to comment I totally understand that you are busy. I haven't been on here that much lately, I am trying to get ready for Merry HO HO!!

Yes, they are the big plastic bins I buy them at Walmart they stack well! Yes, it does add up when one is moving.

We have some snow the ground is covered and staying I am afraid. Actually I like the snow when it is falling in large flakes. It is just the bitter cold that I can't take and here in Winterpeg it seems to get that way. How about you? Does the snow stay there? Take care Jo.

11:29am • #47
JAN
08
2009
1 Featured Post

Jo:

I have just been catching up on some of my Active Rain reading.  What a beautiful blog you've written.  It reminded me of when I moved from Cobourg (just a hop, skip and a jump from Belleville) to where I currently live in Georgetown.  Although I will always think of Cobourg as home, I have grown to love my new area, and wish you the same!

All the best in your new ventures...Nicole

1:18pm • #48
JAN
13
2009
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Trace,

Wow, I don't know how I missed this message of yours. Here I am replying a month late.

We're in for a real bitter cold spell here in southern Ontario this week....how is it out there?

Jo

4:14pm • #49
1 Featured Post

Jo - Best of luck in your new surroundings.  I hope you're already building new memories to help fill in where the others left off.  Stay warm!

5:35pm • #50
JAN
17
2009
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Nicole,

Thanks for stopping by! It's nice to see a comment from someone not too far away from me....perhaps one day we'll meet. ((-:

Thank you so much for your kind words and sentiments...they mean more to me than you might ever realize.

I know Cobourg fairly well, however am not that familiar with Georgetown. I'm glad to hear you're enjoying living there....

Jo

7:16pm • #51
402,651 Points 29 Featured Posts Outside Blog

Hi Lynn,

Thank you! I'm enjoying getting to know the people and surroundings here in Burlington-Oakville area. The people are extremely caring and friendly and the area, although very cold right now, is very beautiful.

You stay warm too!!

((-:

Jo

7:18pm • #52

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Jo-Anne Smith- Oakville, Burlington and Mississauga Region Real Estate, Ont

Oakville, ON

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