Home : Blogs : Randy L. Prothero - Hawaii REALTOR® : Hawaii Randy's Blog

Keeping Your Cool When Others Are Freaking Out

One thing that stands out about a real estate professional is their ability to keep their cool under pressure. The process of buying or selling real estate can be a very stressful process. Buyers are sellers in many cases are dealing with the most expensive thing in their life. Rarely does a real estate transaction happen with a curve ball or two. When this happens we separate the professionals from the amateurs.

The professionals are those who see these are challenges or just part of the process. The amateurs are stressed out, acting badly or just shutting down. As the real estate markets cooled down the chances of a transaction having complications has increased tremendously.

The lenders have tightened their requirements. Buyers are looking for bigger and better deals and everyone is scrutinizing every document more carefully than ever before. In many areas new lending and consumer protection laws have been added to further complicate the process. To throw added stress into the mix there are real estate agents and loan officers who have seen a drop in business, many have taken on other jobs and are doing this part time; many are pushing much too hard to try and get that next commission.

In the last year I have seen:

Real estate agents selling their own properties and breaking rule after rule.
Sellers hiding defects in their properties.
Buyer's agents pushing clients into bad situations, just to close the deal.
Buyers trying to renegotiate the contract after already in escrow.
Lenders changing the requirements in the middle of the transaction.
Tempers flying from all sides when a transaction hits a speed bump.
Loan officers giving bogus loan approval letters to get it in escrow, and then trying to move the buyer to another type of loan or try to get the seller to give additional concessions.

While others are freaking out, you will be able to spot the true professionals. They will be keeping their cool, playing by the rules and getting the job done.

Posted by Randy L. Prothero - Hawaii REALTOR® on 12/02/2008 03:15 PM

Comments (74)

Customer Service in the Home Buying Channel

realtors, real estate agents, loan officers

Originally posted at: Hawaii Randy's Real Estate Opinions: Keeping Your Cool When Others Are Freaking Out

This post has been included in Hawaii Information Honolulu County, HI Information
Post is included in group: Almost Anything Goes
Post is included in group: Hawaii Real Estate Professionals
Post is included in group: Inspiration !!
Post is included in group: POSITIVE ATTITUDE for the Weary Soul
Post is included in group: Realtors®

74 Comments on Keeping Your Cool When Others Are Freaking Out

DEC

I so appreciate this as I did find my cool slipping yesterday in negotiations on a sale. Back to the yoga mat!

Janice - I had mine tested real hard this last week. Fortunately I kept my cool and we will be closing a real difficult transaction.

Right on Brother Randy!! Remaining cool calm and collected is what gets transactions closed. I'm an expert at it.

I hope all is well with you.

B.B. - All is well. It was great meeting you and TLW in person.

Shucks. Might as well keep your cool. Your # 1 through # 7 are not new.

I've witnessed all of them for many, many years.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

All of these things have been going on for the last few years. Keeping a cool head that solves problems is much better than blowing it!

Randy -

You hit the nail on the head, man!

Every point you make rings true, and I have seen many desparation agents in the past year attempt to do anything to hold things together - or agents, in resignation, that give up too easily.

Let's help for a less stressful 2009. Cooler heads will ALWAYS prevail.

BTW . . . it's just like HI here in Chicago today, except about 60 degrees cooler. And lightly snowing! You?

DEAN & DEAN'S TEAM CHICAGO

Always great advice to try to remain calm, regardless of the situation. I find keeping my mouth shut until I can get alone then letting go if needed in my own space, cures my need for any outbursts, many a client thinks Im one cool headed person, I just smile. Every deal has its drama and you can prevail, just sit there with a smile until the first wave of emotion passes. Or at least that works for me.

Randy, geeze! People did that kind of stuff in these parts when the market was white hot and every buyer thought (correctly) they were paying way too much! Love your graphic! That guy looks really, really pissed!

Hey Randy,

I've seen the same thing here...probably worse in FL...more people who think they are no it alls when they capitalize on that stuff...now they are crying and flipping hamburgers for a living...nothing wrong with flipping hamburgers but that wasn't their intentions.

Randy yes this year has brought out the good bad an ugly. As professional Realtors we recognize the stress each player is facing yet remain cool thus helping others to do the same.

Randy, Currently experiencing 4, 5, and 6--I love the timeliness of your article. My saving Grace is going back to childhood training regarding "Guarding" the tongue. (from the inside out)

Lenn - True, not knew for those of us who have been around. For many, you would think they never faced a challenge before.

Laura - It has always gone on. I think since the market cooled some, the less than professional folks have gotten worse.

Dean - I grew up in Chicago (Lane Tech High School). I am so glad I traded in the snow for the sun and surf years ago.

Great post, Randy. I have seen so many half-baked schemes it's not even funny. The hurdles buyers and sellers face today are not roadblocks, but simply obstacles to navigate around. This IS what we're paid to do although sadly many still just don't get it.

Gail - Good point, it is good to hear them out before saying anything.

Patricia - In this market they have a lot less forgiveness in their hearts.

Neal - Here we have both types of flippers (hotel beds and burgers) getting into real estate and now jumping out.

Jennifer - Cooler heads almost always prevail.

Suzi - I have had to bite my tongue so many times that I draw blood. LOL

Jesse - You are right, that is where we earn our money.

Palying by the rules makes it easier to stay cool...no need to backtract!

Randy - #7 happened to me personally while buying a home (before I was licensed). I was so frustrated as I had moved here (San Antonio, TX) from Philadelphia, PA to buy a house and relocate, when the loan turned into something I didn't expect. Needless to say we closed 2 months after our closing date and my agent never batted an eyelash. He was cool and calm the entire time. I credit him for re-sparking my interest in real estate and that whole time is part of the reason why I decided to make the decision. Seeing that it can be done without being a wreck or even worse, a commission chaser, made me know that there are good honest agents out there and gave me a path to follow.

I had 2 transaction wobbling and falling apart since August...I felt like I was on the edge most of the time, but tried to just HOLD it in the fragile balance...miraculously, they both closed last week on the same day!

Hi Randy!

you are soooo right, people seem to be eager to drop ethical standards just to make the deal. Not good at all!

Keeping your cool just makes you look and feel more professional. Cool heads ALWAYS prevail.

Randy,

Great post. The market is different and you need to educate everyone along the way. I subscribe to mortgage fraud blog and their are many industry professionals going to jail because they are trying to get around the system in a fraudulent way. It is definitely weeding out a lot of people.

Thank you again!

Hi Randy, Excellent observations on the mental effects heightened by the current market.

What a great post Randy! This is so true, a real professional DOES NOT lose their cool but rather that is the situation when one must exercise customer service, it is the time when one knows how successful they will be with the sale on a good note when they exercise good ethics.

This market is definitely going to separate the boys from the men. The professionals will be here after the first of the year, plugging along, doing all the right things to earn more business. The others, the "amatures" as you call them, will be working other jobs. A cleansing will take place. I plan to be one of the MEN left standing when this all shakes out.

Each and every transaction lately has had its share of issues to be ironed out and addressed. I consider each onea learning experience and know that I am become a more competent professional with each success and failure.

Randy,

My most recent one is #2 Sellers hiding defects in their properties.

Some how they accidentally forget to disclose the A/C stopped working on the PCR. The Buyer wanted to stop by and measure a room two days before the Home Inspection. We noticed the electricity was turned off. I called the listing agent to have it turned back on and got the darn we forgot to tell you about the A/C.

good reminders. I have also seen at least 4 things on that list this year. The more I accept that the transactions are challenging, and part of the job, the better I can sleep at night

Randy - Great suggestions. But I think keeping your cool, would be a little easier for you there in Hawaii, than it would some of us in other parts of the country :-)

While I agree with everything you said, there are times when even the most professional among us sometimes lose it.

Randy this is not the business for the weak of heart. We have to always stay focused on getting the deal closed first, plenty of time to yell and scream later.

Randy - if it were easy, buyers and sellers wouldn't need us! We're here to orchestrate everything, and keep the participants calm (by being calm ourselves). I tell my clients, don't worry until I tell you to worry.

Hi Randy,

The thing is; YES we as Realtors always pray that everything goes smoothly and that the closing is sooner rather than later without any glitches. What I've come to find is that once I take a step back and set the tone of all involved in the transaction it normally works out. The key is not to procrastinate so that everything is done in a timely manner. Then if there are any discrepencies there is still time to work them out or move on to the next property if there is a lack of co-operation and willingness to move forward for the good of everyone involved.

super poast gee think of the fact if the banks were in real estate sales.

Randy - Succinct and well put. For the most part, I've kept my cool in the most dismal of situations. This year has proved to be not only challenging, but telling in many aspects. Keeping cool, while sometimes difficult, is absolutely necessary... especially right now.

Randy, as time goes on the true professionals will rise to the top and slowly but surely others will be gone.

Randy - so true. Bad behavior and flaring tempers has definitely been on the rise this last year or two. Lots of frustrations for both buyers and sellers around mortgage problems, low appraisals, hidden defects, difficulty showing property and more. There are times when it is tough for the most level-headed, calm professional to keep calm.

Jeff

I know what you mean Randy. We are seeing all kinds in this market and the worst are the LO's giving approval letters or promising the world and what they can tell us to write in a contract....when it's simply not the case.

Randy- #7 just happened to us again today. Our seller is facing foreclosure and the lender for the buyers is playing games with us and I am biting my tongue so I don't lose it!

Randy.. You are so correct here... If the Realtor can't stay calm, cool and collective... How can we expect our client to do the same.. It is our job to keep them calm to work thew the hickups.

Randy - Wonderful post! Yes, I have seen people becomming ruthless this year. You've given many good examples.

Sounds like fun and I am anxious to jump in - cool is my game (comes easy in MN winters)

Breathe deeply, relax and go for it.

I have seen so many outrageous acts of all varieties in the past year from agents. Strange times bring out strange behaviors, for sure!

Randy - reading this made me laugh. So many crazy things have happened this year that haven't seen before from fellow agents. Freaking out for sure! ~Rita

DEC

Congratulations on the star Randy! It is almost embarrassing to be a realtor at times... but the good ones definitely stand out and hopefully, survive.

Yes, Randy! Grace under pressure... it's all about our character! Great post.

I could add to this that market conditions do not mean that ethics go out the window. I just had a realtor lie to me and it hurt my clients which mean I have to do sonthing about it. I just hate that.

Randy,
You covered the subject very well. Professionalism gets the job done.

Randy,Excellent reminder. After 22 years in the business, I think everything you mentioned has happened to me. But keeping your cool is the only way to handle these situations.

William F. - Playing by the rules does help keep us focused.

Matt S. - We had a similar experience when my wife and I bought our home. It made me decide to get back in the industry. I knew that I could do it better and my clients would never be treated the way we were.

Mara H. - If you keep moving forward in a positive way, you will usually work out the roguh edges. Congratulations!

Keeping your cool is defintiely important and wise. Cooler heads prevail, right?

Regarding rules-It's funny, around here rules went out the window several years back in the irrational market. It's amazing how many times I saw incomplete offers, lazy work, or just old fashioned ignorance at hand. We all make mistakes or miss a blank once in a while, but some of it is inexcusible and broker's should be more responsible about looking at offers before they go out the door. These days we see it with short sale properites especially. Thanks for the good blog.

It is a lot easier to find a solution to a problem that arises if you do remain calm and are able to think rationally instead of freaking out. I remember representing a buyer on a transaction that had quite a few bumps. The listing agent would call me screaming and I remember thinking "How is this going to solve anything?". I was really disappointed in the reactions of the other agent. It all worked out and we closed on time. I wonder if she had to 'put on a show' for her clients?

I think staying calm is an art that you have to get good at with years of experience. Great post, I enjoyed the read!

Yes, sometimes it would be easy to LOSE your COOL but in the end it all works out better when you keep it. That is when it is nice to have someone OUTSIDE the transaction that you can vent on and get those uncool things off your chest

You are so COOL!

Debbie

We laugh at stress their is nothing worse than letting it get the best of you.

DEC

Mihaela - You are right, not good at all.

Jason D. - I agree.

Tony T. - I am glad they are finally cracking down on some of the mortgage fraud. That was a contributor to many of the market problems.

Bill G. - Thank you

Diana P. - Thank you

Marjorie - I have already renewed my license and expect a good 2009. Good luck to you, I hope you have a prosperous 2009.

Lori G. - Good point, we learn something from every transaction.

Denise G. - Amazing how they forgot to mention that.

Team Carroll - Unfortunately I have seen everything on that list this year.

Myrl j. - I do not known that it is easier in Hawaii, but when a hard day is over it is easier to unwind.

Margaret W. - Even the best of us can have their buttons pushed.

George S. - Staying focused is the key.

Sharon S. - I tell my clients to expect a couple of last minute surprises, it is not unusual. If something pops up they are prepared.

Anonymous -That is so true. Problems are not fine wine, they do not get better by letting them age.

Donald U. - The banks are in real estate sales with all the short sales, pre-foreclosures and REOs. They are unable to handle them.

Jason S. - I have saved a few really difficult sales just by keeping my cool and working through the emotions that were flying around.

Charles S. - I agree.

Jeff D. - Like they say, that is why we get the big bucks. :)

Sally C. - I do have the hardest time keeping calm when a vendor is lying or cheating.

Katerina - I rarely have that happen, when I represent the buyers. Most of my clients choose to work with one of my recommended loan officers.

Carol C. - Thank you

Kathleen L. - It is easier to move forward when you keep your cool.

Janna R. - The bad ones get worse in tougher times.

Kenna & Co, - I am seeing more bad behavior.

Randy, I also think that these are moments when we need to put our ethical professionalism into practice, a time to 'experience' the realities of real estate and what comes with it. It can be very frustrating to deal with today's real estate market woes but if we are not people oriented, we might as well work somewhere else. Real estate is serious business and patience is a virtue!

Susie B. - I am never embarrassed to be a REALTOR®, but I get annoyed with those who are unprofessional.

JB - Thank you

Teresa B. - I have had a few of those. Agents who do that, need to find another line of work.

Cynthia T. - Thank you

Barb S. - I am sure those 22 years in the business has helped you to cope under fire.

Meyer L. - Many of the badly written contracts I see are also missing broker signatures.

Pam S. - I am sure that screaming did not impress her clients either.

Jason F. - I know that age and maturity has helped me. When I was younger I would have lost my temper in many of the situations I deal with calmly today.

Debbie H. - It is good to have someone to bounce it off at times.

Thank you.

Unusual - They say laughter is the best medicine.

Diana - You are right it is a required skill in this business.

DEC

Randy- We don't work with buyers. So the buyers' agents are the ones that are either going along with the buyers' choice or the buyer is using that agent's preferred lenders. You should see some of those shady charectors south of our county. We just cringe when we see their area code calling us.

Nester & Katrina - There are a few agents and vendors in my area that make me cringe when I see their name involved with a transaction.

DEC

That can apply to home inspectors, too, especially when an unhappy amateur or Seller decides to give us a call and disparage not only us, but our brothers, sisters, parents, grandparents, and great grandparents, not to mention calling us every name in the book, some of which our virgin ears had never heard before -- LOL.

DEC

Russel - It can apply to home inspectors. Fortunately none of my clients have ever gotten mad at the home inspector.

DEC

Randy,

Unfortunately, this is all too true. There is a lot of stress and potential pitfalls in a real estate transaction. It's part of our job to try and keep everybody calm and proceeding through transaction as easily as possible.

Christine - I agree

Leave a response…

Name:

Email:
(optional)

Comment:

What does the graphic say?