Many years ago my uncle, Benjamin "Ben" Wilkes Hale, asked, "Son, let me ask you something. What would you do today if you had nothing to fear?" I gave him my answer and he replied ...
GO DO IT. THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR.
Well, I did. I'm not sure he was right about there being nothing to fear but that is not the point. The point is I did it and have been more successful than most of my competitors. Today there seems to be plenty to fear: the economy, the uncertainty of a new set of politicians, the price of oil and gas, the availability of employment. So instead of listing fears just answer the question for yourself (and for us in a comment):
What would you do today if you had nothing to fear?
I ask this question regularly both online and in person. I often ask it in my seminars and public speaking opportunities. Do you know that every time I ask it in person, face to face, I get one of three responses: Immediate introspection, instantaneous laughter or mental stuttering. Why? Because we rarely think of ourselves as fearful? No. Because we normally do not even consider facing the question! We normally do not attempt to push through the fear and seek the results we desire to obtain.
Winners are not afraid to fail and losers are afraid to attempt. I have failed at things in my life. The only living, bodily present person I know who claims to have never failed isn't even worth mentioning. Everyone knows we never plan to fail but we often fail to plan. Whatever it is you would do today if you had nothing to fear starts right now, this very second, with the simple thought of the thing to do. From there it must move to a plan.
Winning means attempting and overcoming failure. What does that mean, Ken? It means without attempting you have already failed. You will continue to fail as long as you fail to attempt. Make your plan, set a date and time, involve the necessary components and act - attempt. You must overcome the failure to attempt.
Failure hurts. The saying "once bitten twice shy" is perfectly applicable to failure. The first attempt simply means overcoming fear. The subsequent attempts mean overcoming the pain of the previous failure, the original fear of failure and the embarrassment of trying again. So now you have three things to overcome on subsequent attempts but they are all still based on FEAR. Fear is not always, as some people like to say, false evidence appearing real. In fact sometimes fear is very real evidence and very dangerous. Most people do not sky dive because of real evidence of previous events. However, stay with me now, that is evidence of other attempts and not the current attempt!
Get over the pain, push through the fear. Knowledge is power and the reason knowledge is power is because you are learning what is "on the other side". Mentors and teachers are the best friends of success. Find some and use them to see into the future. Here is the truth: You can do anything you set your mind to that doesn't break a law of nature (but don't be afraid to explore even that!)
So what is it you are going to do today in spite of your fears?
THE OPINIONS IN THIS COMMENTARY ARE STRICTLY KEN COOK's PERSONAL OPINION AND NOT REFLECTIVE ON ACTIVE RAIN, NOVATION MORTGAGE, or ANY SPONSOR OF THIS WEBSITE.
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NOTICE: I have been writing in this blog since July 2006. Some of the older articles may contain information that has changed. Please check the date and phone me if you have any questions.
What an awesome, uplifting post. Thanks for sharing. That's just what I needed as I prepare to fly back from vacation and pound the pavements for listings.
I'm going to start a car company. Heck, with half of the money GN wants for their "loans" I could employ a pant load of people and make something truly awesome.
Virginia Satir, a pioneer in the field of family therapy, writes, "Most people prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty."
When I worked in the field of addiction I heard "it's not that bad" from family members on a daily basis. Invariably a story of broken promises, disappointments, chaos and upheaval would be summarily dismissed with the refrain, "But, it's not that bad."
People! How bad does it have to get before we push through the fear of change? Before we share our stories openly with one another? Before we admit our foundations have shifted? Before we let go of the illusions of certainity?
I've found being honest about my fears - sharing my fears openly with others - enables me to move forward. With support, I can say more easily, "This is as bad as it's gonna get."
Hi Ken, I loved your uplifting and meaningfull post,I am still thinking of the answer. Inspite of my slowness I hear the gears changing inside of me:)))
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GO DO IT. THERE IS NOTHING TO FEAR.
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What an awesome, uplifting post. Thanks for sharing. That's just what I needed as I prepare to fly back from vacation and pound the pavements for listings.