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Tips for Reluctant Prospectors - Stay IN Your Comfort Zone!

The sales gurus tell you to step outside your comfort zone. Take that first painful step. Push yourself to do the things you'd rather not.

Makes sense, I s'pose.

But is it really necessary? Maybe not.

Frankly, I think I'm pretty darn cool just the way I am, without stepping out of my zone. I think that I can be me, and succeed just fine.

Don't wanna cold call? So don't. If you don't wanna, you'll probably suck at it anyway. Call your mother instead.

Don't wanna hunt for FSBO's? Join the club. Meet three friends for brunch or bang out a few personal emails.

Don't wanna spend the weekend handing out cards from your company's Peanut Festival booth? Me neither. But I might stop by and say hi!

So what DO you wanna do?

Make a list of the things you're good at, the things you enjoy, that don't give you the jitters. Chances are, hidden in that list are plenty of ideas to generate business for yourself. I'll bet you're creative enough to come up with some great ones (and please share!)

You got this far in life being YOU. Just ‘cause you're in real estate doesn't mean you have to change. You're already terrific!

Stay tuned - more tips coming soon.

www.sellwithsoul.com

Posted by Jennifer Allan-Hagedorn, Author of Sell with Soul on 04/25/2007 11:32 AM

Comments (37)

Sell With Soul Strategies for Introverts in the Sales Strategies / Tactics Channel

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Originally posted at: Selling Soulfully with Jennifer Allan: Tips for Reluctant Prospectors - Stay IN Your Comfort Zone!

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37 Comments on Tips for Reluctant Prospectors - Stay IN Your Comfort Zone!

APR

2007

Jennifer,

That's one of the reasons we moved on this week to a new company! They believe in letting you be who you are! There is a delicate balance between facing fears and challenges to stretch us, and maintaining our uniqueness. I think we need to try things we don't like to do, we may learn to like it... Take exercise for an example. LOL!

I remember hearing that Johnny Carson used to be a nervous wreck and felt nauseous every night before he cam out from behind the curtain. Can you imagine of he let that stop him?

For us personally, if doing a particular activity causes total stress and physically effects, and gets in the way of effectively doing other things, then it's time to check that one off the list and move on.

I am of the belief that to really excel, you have to go into uncharted waters at some time. This way you expand your comfort zone and can become more successful. I do believe that you have to be given the tools and coaching to do this and not be just thrown out to the wolves. Have you ever thought how primitive we would be if people never took a chance because they wanted to stay with what they already knew in their comfort zone?

I'll agree that taking risks and trying new things may result in something wonderful. No argument there!

However, most real estate sales training is geared toward a certain personality type and style, and doesn't necessarily fit the more "reluctant" among us. We feel bad when we "fail" at our efforts to be someone we're not and become discouraged that maybe, just maybe, a career in real estate was a bad idea.

I want to encourage agents to think beyond the traditional methods of building a business and to truly make their business their own...

Frankly, I rarely step outside my comfort zone - I'm stubborn that way. Even in grade school, my teachers noted that I was exceptionally good at what I was naturally good at... but I wouldn't even bother doing things that didn't come naturally to me.

And I've succeeded in everything I've done. MY way!

If you are uncomfortable cold calling or going after FSBO's then that shows to the customer. Why do something you think is miserable? It becomes a self fulfilling prophesy. Might as well do what you enjoy because you will be happy and that will be projected to the world and people will want to do business with you.

Jennifer - awesome blog. thank you for the tips.! ron

You may have something here.

Jennifer,

Thank you for the thought-provoking post.

I was thinking to myself -- Self, "how do you really know whether you like or dislike something until you try it?" And I mean, give it a fair try. There are a heck of a lot of things that make me uncomfortable and if I avoided all of them, I'd probably just have to stay at home. I tend to agree with a guy named Steve Chandler, that "the comfort zone is a place to rest, not to live."

I think a certain amount of discomfort is necessary in order to experience personal (and professional) growth. Often times we think too much and do too little. Unfortunately, overthinking situations can lead to feelings of fear and anxiety. Our feelings then become the excuse not to take action.

How many times have you tried something that made you uncomfortable or afraid and nothing bad happened to you? Even if you weren't 100% successful, you probably felt some measure of success just for making the effort. If you are going to talk to FSBO's, Expired's or make cold calls, be prepared. First, make sure you get the proper training--and by that, I mean training that fits closely with your own personal style. You may have to seek training outside of your company in order to find the perfect fit. Then you need to practice, practice, practice. Finally, take action and call those FSBO's and Expired's, etc. You won't be perfect at first, but you will get better at it and you might even begin to like it! And you know what, you can still do it your way!!! You will never be comfortable until you take your training and tweak it and make it your own.

My natural tendency is to be a reluctant salesperson, but by taking action I have come to enjoy working with FSBO's. They aren't as scary as they appear. I've gained a lot of confidence from doing something that I was originally afraid of. While I agree that you should do things you like, I also believe we need to do things that make us uncomfortable as well. Yes, we might and probably will have failures. When we fail, we learn. If we're not ever failing at anything, it means we aren't really living.

One of the reasons I enjoy real estate sales is because it is very challenging and has pushed me out of my comfort zone (way out!!!).

Excellent points, Michelle!

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Sometimes I look around my office and I read the e-mail from my broker and I wonder if I am the only realtor on earth who shudders at the very words "cold call." Been there, tried that, got nowhere. What has worked for me is just being nice to people, and talking to everyone. Hey, it's better than nothing, right?

Christina,,,

Better than nothing? It's WAY better than nothing! You're way ahead of all those agents who are beating down stranger's doors with their memorized scripts and dorky marketing materials!

Great post Jennifer. Excellent points. I totally agree with this. My husband does not like talking on the phone, period, so he decided to start an internet branch of our company. Works out great for everybody! Good post. Fun vernacular.

When I was first starting out the company I was with had kiosks in the malls. I hate malls never have liked them except maybe the outdoor ones. So what do I do? Yep sign up for mall duty. Why? Because our trainer told us to try everything. So even though I knew i hated malls I still signed up. It took me several months to finally quit and that was after feeling like I was going to throw up and pass out during a mall session on two occasions. I told you I really do hate malls. So never ever again will I "try" something I already know will make me uncomfortable.

APR

2007

Ashley - I SO know what you're talking about!! I hate malls and I always felt so sorry for the poor agent sitting in those kiosks - I'm sure their broker told them what a great opportunity it would be.

Karen - Life's too short to do things you don't wanna (when you don't have to). I'm the same way - I hate talking on the phone and I've finally gotten up the nerve to tell my family this.

I read an article somewhere... sometime... that dissed the idea of being "well-rounded" in favor of focusing on your existing strengths. I sure wish I could remember where it was...

Jennifer, Thank you for this post! My Broker is always tring to push me out of my box but I am also stubborn and feel I can do a better job with in my comfort zone. If I am uncomfortable with something I am sure it shows to my customer. if I am comfortable I exude confidence and that is very important in sales. Thank You for letting me know I"m not the only one that feels like that!

APR

2007

Thank you, Jennifer, for a terrific post. I DO step WAY out of my comfort zone on occasion and it has been good for me in the long run but tend to do the things more often that I LIKE to do now. And I am always me, people will either like you or they won't :) I think most people like others who are REAL anyway...

APR

2007

but there's always someone telling you to do something outside your comfort!

my partner/mentor is always telling me to break my habits of uncomfort... how do you challenge that objection?

Easy...

From Don't Sweat the Small Stuff About Money by Richard Carlson, PhD

"Chances are you're probably really good at certain things and really bad at others. So what? Why should you frustrate yourself and waste your time doing those things you struggle with? This doesn't mean you can't learn new skills or improve existing ones. It merely suggests that you spend the bulk of your time doing whatever it is you do best as well as that which is most important to your success. It's easy to get bogged down and defeated doing tasks you don't enjoy and aren't very good at. Certainly, many, if not most of these tasks need to get done, but not necessarily by you.

What if you could spend an extra two or three hours a day focusing on that which you truly love and are genuinely good at? What would happen to your productivity, creativity and bottom line? You'll never know for sure until you try, but I can assure you that, for me and for so many others, this simple idea has been an extremely profitable insight."

You know, I might be "BI" (Intro & Extro-vert) or insane, one of the two! LOL!

I grew up what people call shy, and I love my privacy, personal space, I hate being the center of attention and I never liked introducing myself to people!!

However, a mentor seen some things in me that I did not, and he encouraged me to "step out" of my shell and try something different.

Come to find out, I make a great speaker, I have great "stage presence" and people generally like me and want to hear what I have to say.

Had I not stepped out and had my own t.v. show, started rapping, teaching and doing public speaking engagements, I would have never found out that there was an equally delightful outgoing Extrovert inside!

My Introvert personality is the dominant, but I have control over the Extrovert and let her out only if the occasion calls for it or when I need to. When the shows over, and the clients go home, I crawl back in my comfy-cozy shell and be with the person I enjoy the most (outside my kids) ...ME!

Toya - that's great! Actually... lots of speakers and performers are Introverts... very good ones, in fact. I, too, enjoy public speaking. I wouldn't mind going On Tour to promote my book, except that I'd hate to be away from home...

Congratulations! Where can I check you out?

It was so funny today! I went to this business meeting this afternoon. I went just to check out their great "business opprtunity" but I saw it as a chance to network. I didn't know anyone but one person in the room. They had seating set up in a circle so everyone could kinda be facing each other. When I got my food, I was one of the first people to sit down. When I sat in that unknown circle, I IMMEDIATELY FELT UNCOMFORTABLE! Now, I know I said I came there to network, so you would think I'd sit in the circle be a chipper little camper and invite others to come around me as they look for seating right??? WRONG!!! Not for the Introvert!!!

So, being the natural introvert I am, I find a seat AWAY FROM everyone else, outside the circle! As I watched everyone else search for seating and figure out their "social positioning" I delightfully and might I mention...comfortably ate my food watching the clicks form. I listened to every chattering conversation and found no need to inject myself into any of them...until someone made the comment about the tuna. I thought the tuna was deliciously peculiar myself as I was eating it, so I found my way into a conversation.

"The salmon is great! Who bought the salmon?" one of associates asked.

"Betty brought it," they responded.

I don't remember seeing any salmon on the table, so I look at thier plates and it seemed like they were referring to the "tuna" as salmon.

So I blurt out, "You mean...this isn't tuna?"

Everyone in the room burst out in a synonymous laughter. I was like, "I knew there was something different about this tuna!"

From that point on, the entire room opened up to me, and it made my networking a lot easier and allowed me to be myself.

This kinda thing happens to me ALL THE TIME! I don't necessarily try to be humorous, but I tend to have what someone else might think as a "blonde" moment (no offense to any intelligent blondes out there) and become the "light" of the room!

After connecting with some people, I withdrew from the social scene, got some more food and politely made my exit without any grand good-byes. I know I left a lasting impression just being myself and I couldn't emphasize that enough!!

Jenni: if you go to my profile and click on the word "DALLAS" it will take you straight to my myspace page with my music on it.

I'm in the process of uploading some of my speeches, and a few of my better broadcasts of my t.v. show. It's taking me a little longer because I don't want to pay someone else to do it. I'm currently in a Toastmasters Club and I'm looking for more speaking engagements to reach out to the youth in my local area. For some strange reason, kids listen to me, so when I discovered this, I try to get in front of them as much as I can to talk some sense into 'em. Last year I spoke a graduating senior class of a local High School and did a song for them. The music tends to really get their attention!

I kinda forgot the main point of what i was talking about, but...oh yeah!

Being an Introvert is GREAT!!!

APR

2007

Toya - Introverts are observers! I always find myself watching everyone else and enjoying myself immensely. Then I'll snap out of it and realize I should join in on the fun, only to find myself, again, watching.

Great story. I'll go check out your site now.

MAY

2007

I'm mixed up regarding this topic. I agree that if it's not something that you feel comfortable doing that you probably shouldn't do it, but I also feel that, in my experience, that most of the time that the fear of doing something is worse than actually doing it. I also say that some of my best experiences were experienced when I was outside my comfort zone??

I'll have to chew on this...great post.

Bob Mitchell

ValueList

During my 2nd year in real estate, I was sitting in a training class when my managing broker asked me how many hours a week I prospect. Because I was "rookie of the year" (thankfully age was not a factor!) for my office the year prior, he was hoping for something inspirational, I suppose, for the new folks who were in attendance. I have to give him credit, his jaw didn't drop (although he did seem to cringe ever so slightly) when I said, "None. I don't prospect. I don't ask for referrals. I just have fun with it."

We have an awesome manager, don't get me wrong -- he is fully of energy, has training classes going on all the time on all different subjects, for agents at all different levels, I cannot say enough good things about him -- but he is a Buffini guy and it has always worked for him. Hardcore prospecting made him a very successful agent and in his world, that should work for everyone.

I went on to say if I had to pick up the phone, cold call or knock on doors, I would find another career. I HATE it, absolutely loathe it. So why do it??? I didn't get into real estate to make myself miserable. My primary motivation for getting into real estate, I admit, was to avoid a daily commute and not have to get up in the morning. Seriously. I have done the "self sacrificing" thing and I'm done with that. I like being comfortable, I like doing what I like to do...always have. And now, I have a thriving career that is fun and profitable -- and it's based on having fun. Not that I don't work hard for my clients -- don't get me wrong, I am a total Type A workaholic -- but as far as getting new business goes, why schlep around town knocking on doors when I can take friends to lunch, to a concert or invite them to spend a week at our beach house? Why spend $$$ on mail when I can get a tax write off for taking someone to dinner or for throwing a party at my house?

Step outside the comfort zone? WHY? I like being comfortable! Jennifer has it exactly right!

While I like the idea of going to brunch and hanging out with my friends I have to think of the fact that those things cost money and if I'm not bringing in business than I can't do those things...vicious circle! I think social networking is important and maintaining relationships because that is where a lot of business is going to come from. I also think it's good to do the things that are uncomfortable, sometimes. Not for the sake of doing it but to overcome fear and intimidation, which is what a lot of people deal with, introvert or not. I don't plan on going door-to-door or calling on FSBO's; it's not what suits my personality. But when I get leads in my neighborhood, yeah, I go to the door because that's where I market to. When I choose to do the uncomfortable it gives me confidence and confidence gives me courage. I feel confident enough to not do something just because I feel pressured to do it, but I'm also willing to be challenged. I go to the office and "listen" to what others are doing and saying. Sometimes I take someone's idea and expand on it or "tweak" it to fit me. If we're so self-focused and determined to do it our way we may just miss out on a golden opportunity...sometimes it's worth the try.

MAY

2007

My managing broker said this to me when I was in training. Everyone has to find things that work for them. I network like crazy, I blog, I work the floor every chance I get and I work expireds. Those are things that I am good at and so far it works for me!

MAY

2007

Jennifer,

Great points.I have found that I struggle sometimes when I step out of my comfort zone. Sometimes it works and other times it is a disaster.

JUL

2007

I am a new agent struggling to stay afloat financially and stay in this game. I really enjoy working with people and I am doing all the Open houses, internet leads and calling those in my very limited SOI but I am coming up empty. All of the things I have read, studied and so on say to do the things that none of you do. So where DO you find your clients? I am a single woman, no one to support me but my 401k account which is starting to look pretty sad, so any ideas would be gratefully accepted!

JUL

2007

First, you need to change your screen name! Desperate in IN??? !!! This will only bring more desperation to your life.

Seriously, a positive attitude will take you much further than any gimmick, program or strategy. Until you feel confident about yourself and your career, any other efforts are wasted.

Feel free to email me if you'd like to chat about this further!

Jennifer

JUL

2008

Just because you focus on adding more depth to your soi doesn't mean you HAVE to ignore other ways of prospecting. I do well with expireds and they are well within my comfort zone and so I plan on ramping up the s.o.i "campaign" , will continue my expired work and I am going to enjoy being in this business.

My hang up has always been this: I don't like to be called by strangers and I despise unexpected visitors to my home . I feel as if my space is being invaded and that my precious family time is being interupted. For those reasons I have always had a hard time calling and dropping by other peoples homes.

I am REALLY introverted unless I know people and then I am fine so I am going to try to build depth into my sphere and develop better relationships with those people rather than simply treating the people in my sphere like lead cows.

SEP

2008

My first broker in charge insisted we cold call for 2 hours every morning, and her idea of "coaching" us was to have a weekly meeting where we turned in a chart of how many cold calls we made, and how many contacts, how many sales, etc.

I was absolutely miserable.

You're right, you have to be yourself. I do push myself sometimes to step out of my comfort zone, but now I'm working for a company that lets me be me, and I'm happier than I've ever been, and more successful too.

I was absolutely miserable.

FEB

2010

Jennifer, So glad to find out about you and your blog, a breath of fresh air. Being in my comfort zone is very important, yet I am able to step out of it in order to find out about people and potential clients. You and all who have responded raise very good points and observations. Thank you. ---Gloria

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Pensacola Beach, FL

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