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Do You Answer The Phone During Family Dinner Time?

By
Real Estate Agent with The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services 13253167-SA00

The circus was coming to town and would be in town for only one weekend. Father promised Johnny and David he would take them to the circus. family time The boys were so excited to go. After all, father worked long hours and missed many of the boys events because his phone would ring for a big business deal.The boys were used to the words, " A client just called boys, we will have to do this another time." The let downs had become a part of life in their household. Mom would have everyone sitting down at the dinner table, as soon as the family prayer was over more times than not father's phone would ring and the boys knew he was leaving the dinner table to talk to a client.

In the excitement of the circus being in town the boys got up extra early this Saturday morning and rushed down to the kitchen table to get their breakfast. Father was ready to go as well. The family sat down to eat breakfast and as usual Father's phone rang. Father answers the phone while Johnny and David watched in fear of the inevitable, another promise made to be broken, another day alone without their father. The boys knew too well the scenario and the excuses made.

The boys hung on every word as their father spoke on the phone. Then they heard their father say, " I am sorry, this is going to have to wait until Monday because I am taking my sons to the circus today. "

When you are at the dinner table which is one of the most sacred times a family has together are you jumping up to answer the phone? What is the example you are leaving for your children when you do that or not? You see, we are the leaders of our families and our children will become us. What are your children internalizing when they see you leave the dinner table to answer the phone and run out the door to show a house to a buyer? 

Studies have shown that families who spend dinner together have distinct advantages over those that don't.

  • Better grades in school
  • Better readers
  • Better health and nutrition
  • Less drug use
  • Save money on food

There needs to be a sacred time in your family daily and weekly where no one and nothing takes prescedence over your family. This time, whatever it is, whenever it is, can be set by you and your children. Many families choose dinner time, many choose Sundays. But set aside that time. This could be a new year's promise for yourselves and your family.

family time

Start by setting boundaries with your clients. Stop asking how high when a client asks you to jump. You can argue all day long about how you can not afford to miss that ONE client, that magic million dollar buyer you have been waiting for. And I will say, you can not afford to miss one more week without time spent with your children. There will always be another buyer, another seller but there will never be another family like yours.

I have found through many years of working with buyers and sellers that not one of them has expected me to place them above my family. I do not work on Sundays and everyone I work with knows that. Do you know what they say to me? They say, "Good For You."  We don't lose clients because of our Sundays and I promise you, either will you.

My friend, Missy Caulk raised 5 children and never missed a soccer game, football game, cheer leading performance and she runs a great business. It can be done. And if you happen to lose that one client because you have a life and a family, well, they did not deserve you to begin with. If Missy could do it with 5 kids and I could do it with 6 kids than anyone can do it.

So start the New Year with a promise to your family that from now on you will turn your phone on silent during dinner.

Follow me on Twitter at Twitter.com/CoachKaterina.

 

        

 

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Do You Answer Your Phone During Family Dinner Time?  by Katerina Gasset is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

 
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In real estate we service Utah County, Salt Lake County, Wasatch County, Tooele County. This includes many towns and cities. Some of which are: Provo, Orem, Salt Lake City, Draper, Springville, Spanish Fork, Payson, Lehi, American Fork, Vineyard, Saratoga Springs, Eagle Mountain, Pleasant Grove, and more. 

Katerina Gasset is a real estate agent who is also a digital marketing strategist, website designer and consultant for real estate brokerages, agents, entrepreneurs and small business owners. She is also the owner of Get It Done For Me Virtual Services. 

Katerina is a Certified AI Marketing Specialist. She can help you with ChatGPT, Content at Scale, Neuronwriter, prompting, and many other AI tools. 

She develops products and online courses to empower real estate agents to reach their marketing, SEO, social media and branding goals. Katerina Gasset is a blogger, author, podcaster, and keynote speaker.  

Text Katerina with your name + number to work with her:

 561-502-1577 

 

 

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Comments (153)

Gail Robinson
William Raveis Real Estate - Southport, CT
CRS, GRI, e-PRO Fairfield County, CT

Katerina, Setting boundaries around taking phones calls is a tough one for me.  I was in a car accident the other day and answered the phone.  To my credit I explained I was in an accident and asked him to call back and leave a message.  I told him I'd return his call from the Emergency Room (I figured I'd have a long wait and might as well do something.)  After the doctor checked me out and I knew I was fine, I set up an appointment to show him a rental, which he is moving into on Monday.  My client told me he was a little freaked out that I answered the phone during the accident.  Our instincts to take that call are so strong!  Good for you for setting boundaries.  I'm working on it.

Dec 27, 2008 06:37 PM
Eunice Waller
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Simpson Realtors - Locust Grove, VA
Working Together, We Can Do Great Things

Katrina, this is a great topic. Our family has always had daily sit down dinners and Sunday dinners.  It is an important time for families to reconnect from the day.  My son and daughter are grown with children now and dinner is the important part of their families day as well.  No Phones, No Television, No Computer are allowed during family dinner time.  As the old saying goes..."Children learn what they live."

Wishing you and your family a blessed New Year!

Dec 27, 2008 10:51 PM
Marlene Pellegrini
Norwich, CT

Well my little comment sparked such an insightful comment from you Katerina.  You do have a complex business... A jack of all trades! 

I too have boundraries on when I will and will not work.

Here is to a prosperous New Year! 

Dec 28, 2008 12:11 AM
Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman
Liberty Homes - Mililani, HI
(RA) AHWD CRS ePRO OAHU HAWAII REAL ESTATE

I'm available for clients and answer my phone mostly all the time. Or I call back. I suppose it's different for me when my children are grown and gone. If we have plans...movie...of course I turn it off. I suppose it all depends on the circumstances.

Dec 28, 2008 04:55 AM
Katerina Gasset
The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services - Provo, UT
Amplify Your Real Estate & Life Dreams!

Marlene- We don't work all those angles at the same time:) Each was a great ride and we had a lot of fun doing those land deals and made a lot of money, more than I could ever dream of making in real estate but that was in the hay day down here. Those days are gone and will not be back again as long as I live here, most likely. We look for the opportunities, learn all we can in that area, apply ourselves in it full speed ahead and then always keep our eye on what is coming down the pipeline next because nothing lasts forever:)

You know what they say, jack of all trades is a master of none:) We are always learning and growing.

You have a wonderful prosperous new year too! I think 2009 is going to be awesome!

Dec 28, 2008 05:32 AM
Katerina Gasset
The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services - Provo, UT
Amplify Your Real Estate & Life Dreams!

Sally- Having small children or even teenagers is a different ball game in this business. You are available because of your lifestyle and your kids are grown as you said. I am sure you have some sacred times besides the movie theatre where you do not answer your phone:)

Dec 28, 2008 05:34 AM
James Downing - Metro DC Houses Team REALTORS®, CRS, GRI, ABR,MRP, MilRes
Real Living | At Home - Washington, DC
When Looking to Buy or Sell - Make the Right Move

Guilty as charged.  I am trying to be better... but without much success.  It doesn't help that I am addicted to my 'crackberry'!

Dec 28, 2008 11:19 AM
Marian Gregor-Ann
Keller Williams - Ann Arbor, MI
Arbor area Real Estate

Hi Katerina, Dinnertime is sacred family time so I do not answer my phone at dinnertime -I also do not answer my phone when I am with clients. My clients deserve my undivided attention. They appreciate that consideration.  The next time someone 'disses' you & answers the phone during your meeting, how do you feel?

Dec 28, 2008 04:05 PM
Jennifer Hartwick
Crane and Crane Real Estate - Columbia, MO

We sit down as a family each night for dinner, although not both parents are there each night.  I've arranged my schedule so that two nights each week my husband picks up the kids from school and starts the evening routine of homework and dinner.  Those two nights I may or may not make it home for dinner but they always have a home cooked meal and a loving parent.  Those are two nights I know I can be flexible on my schedule. 

Dec 29, 2008 12:27 PM
Carol Culkin
Diamond Partners Inc - Overland Park, KS
Overland Park Residential Real Estate

Katrina -  Well spoken. I would have to say that as a new agent I would drop everything for an opportunity. Now, I am very adamant about my schedule and clients who work with me have had to come to understand that I am not available at a moments notice.

Dec 29, 2008 02:22 PM
John Alesi
Century 21 Award - Mission Viejo, CA
(Orange County California Real Estate)

As our three children have grown (and two have moved out on their own), family dinner has become a smaller affair.  Many times, it  is just me and my wife.  On the occasion when our 20 yr old is home from work and joins us, we make the extra effort to avoid disruptions and spend quality time with our son.  In fact, we don't even clear the dinner plates until we have completed our conversations, which have at times gone on for 1.5 hours on a week night!

We are finding a new "voice" in our son who, in the past, was kind of a restless spirit and didn't make time to be around much.  It's quite refreshing to see him maturing from boy to man.

Dec 29, 2008 04:17 PM
Katerina Gasset
The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services - Provo, UT
Amplify Your Real Estate & Life Dreams!

John- Your comment truly moved me. I have 4 sons and 1 stepson. All of them are over 18 except for our 6 year old who is mine and Nestor's. I have found the same thing with my older sons. It is so wonderful to just sit and have wonderful meaningful discussions with them.

Dec 29, 2008 04:30 PM
Christine Donovan
Donovan Blatt Realty - Costa Mesa, CA
Broker/Attorney 714-319-9751 DRE01267479 - Costa M

You and Missy both have impressive track records.  My 5 year old knows that his special occasions are special to me.  I may be busy often, but there will be time for him.

Jan 02, 2009 04:39 AM
Bill Somerset
Re/Max Realty Group - Dover, NH
ABR, e-PRO - Realtor - NH Real Estate Agent

For the first 2 or 3 years of my career I would answer my phone no matter the time of day, or what I was doing, dinner time included.  My wife had a huge problem with this.  We sat down one evening and had a discussion about this, the amount of time I was devoting to my clients and taking away from my family, when I realized that my clients too had families, they too would understand.

It's a hard thing to accomplish, the fine line of balancing a career and a family life.  But it should not be a hard decision to make.  Family must, and always should come first.

Jan 13, 2009 11:48 PM
Laura Sellers
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices Preferred Real Estate, Inc.; www.AuburnOpelikaALRealEstate.com - Auburn, AL
www.AuburnOpelikaALRealEstate.com

You have to set boundaries and I do believe that it is disrespectful to answer the phone while at dinner.  Unless there is an unusual circumstance, it shows bad manners to me.  The people that you are with NOW deserve your undivided attention.  The answering machine can take the message and you can call the person back as soon as reasonably possible.  After all, isn't our family the reason we work so hard to begin with?

Jan 16, 2009 02:31 AM
Michele Corker
RE/MAX Fine Properties - Chester, VA

I totally agree. I have to remind myself not to feel guilty for letting calls go to voicemail when I am doing something for myself or with my family. You really do have to find that balance and remind yourself that clients should understand that we do still have families and lives!!

Mar 12, 2009 01:19 PM
Michele Corker
RE/MAX Fine Properties - Chester, VA

I totally agree. I have to remind myself not to feel guilty for letting calls go to voicemail when I am doing something for myself or with my family. You really do have to find that balance and remind yourself that clients should understand that we do still have families and lives!!

Mar 12, 2009 01:19 PM
Katerina Gasset
The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services - Provo, UT
Amplify Your Real Estate & Life Dreams!

Michele- It is so true. We tend to jump when the phone rings as if we don't know there is a thing called voice mail! Balance is the key. Of course, there are situations that come up but that is not the norm and we need to be careful not to make it the norm.

Mar 12, 2009 05:38 PM
Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA

Just recently I realized how truly I appreciate  time together with my family.  I try to give them my full attention.

There is so many ways for clients or other agents to reach me and I'll always return a call/text/email promptly. 

Sep 07, 2014 07:42 PM
Katerina Gasset
The Gasset Group & Get It Done For Me Virtual Services - Provo, UT
Amplify Your Real Estate & Life Dreams!

Inna- Wow, how did you find this post? I agree with you. Sometimes it takes us too long to figure this out! And for some, it is too late. 

Sep 08, 2014 06:43 AM