Every day my 1st grade son comes home with a green stamp on his calendar. This tells parents that their child had a great day and was very well behaved. My son has been very proud of the fact that he has never had his color deviate from green, a feat I was proud of as well.
Yesterday, I received a call from the after-care program saying that Brenden, my son, was acting very despondent which is out of character for him. She thought he was ill and that I should come get him, so I did just that. As we got in the car, Brenden said "The teacher ran out of green stamps so she told me to just color it in with green crayon." I never gave it a second thought.
Upon arrival I agreed that something was wrong and got him home to investigate further. Oddly he wanted to play outside and was running around having a great time. I thought nothing of it until a few hours later when he gave me his folder to review and sign off on.
There it was, a glitter of yellow underneath what was apparently green crayon masking his mark of misconduct. I was really shocked as I sat there figuring out what had unfolded.
After listening to his logic, I realized that he was more afraid of my reaction than anything else so he tried whatever he could to cover things up. I explained to him that covering things up that you are not proud of only makes the problem bigger. Now, Daddy was upset as he was lied to as well as disappointed about the behavior issue.
I am happy again as I think it resonated with him and he really understands the lesson. I also think that it is a great reminder for everyone. I have seen this same scenario unfold many times in this business and it has much worse consequences for us when it does. I learned long ago to suck it up and admit when I have screwed up. It may not be pleasant but at least it's honest and I don't have to worry about it kicking me later.
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