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There's a Diplomatic (Nicer) Way to Say IT!

We ALL feel the need to express opinions on many subjects. It's human nature.....we all think differently and have different opinions. Regardless if it's political, about something going on around ActiveRain or Localism or just plain views on religion or abortion, the way you are presenting it can make all the difference in the world.

In other words, I can be assertive to express my opinion. Be mean, nasty, blunt and one sided and no one would want to listen to me. At least I know I wouldn't if I talked me to that way.

I don't Nobody deserves the disrespect from 'loud mouthed' (bolded exclamation demands) from anyone. I have that much respect for myself to not buy into that.....and would surely have the same respect for others to not do it to them.

Being positive does not mean we have to let anyone walk all over us. That also applies to NOT listening to closed minded people who only want to be heard and don't care how they talk to another.

No matter what, we ARE blogging professionals in the Real Estate Industry and if you would not talk to others in the manner you are writing then you might as well keep those fingers off the keyboard.

There's a difference between expressing your opinion and being rude.

Be nice when playing in the sandbox.

For that matter...in the Rain.

Posted by Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman HAWAII Relocations & Real Estate on 02/27/2009 12:51 PM

Comments (35)

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Originally posted at: Hawaii Real Estate, Hawaii Home Buying, Honolulu Housing Market, Hawaii Home Selling, Hawaii Relocations, Hawaii Military Relocations, Mililani Real Estate, Hawaii Homes Market: There's a Diplomatic (Nicer) Way to Say IT!

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35 Comments on There's a Diplomatic (Nicer) Way to Say IT!

FEB

Not sure what happened that motivated you to write this post, but I hope you have a great day.

FOR ALL OF YOU...

Nothing happened to me........it's an everyday thing when communicating online.... and reading ....the everyday thing in the life of a blogger :) Just keeping myself in check so I don't respond to those posts lol!

Steve: I always have a nice day :)

Sis - Believe it or not, I'm a very diplomatic guy. I think it runs in the family:)

Sally, I totally agree with you. There is no need to present yourself in an unflattering way to state your point.

Lil Bro...you've come a long way baby lol! You have never been mean when saying things...I haven't seen that. Then again, I'm partial to little brothers :)

Lourdes: Unflattering is a good word. Some may think they're being cool because they are not afraid to state their opinion but may not realize they're being awfully rude. ....then again, that's just my opinon :)

I always say don't burn bridges because you never know where you may run into them again.

Sally,

I'm almost afraid to respond on this, but I'm not shy...I like TACT, but I'm not big on sugar coating...I'm a one finger typist, so I try to be blunt and to the point...I consider myself a real estate professional in the blogging industry...!!! And BTW, your bluntness is what keeps me coming back...!!! :) Thanks, Fran

I agree. I recently received a very negative comment on a public forum from someone who didn't like something about my company's website. It was very rude and certainly something she could have expressed privately. I am grateful now, though, because she is not someone I would want to work with anyway.

John: That's what I say....burning bridges aren't what we do...it's building them. :)

Fran: Am I blunt mixed with rude obnoxious one sided opinions. I think not. There's a difference between being assertive and being rude. Being to the point is not the same as believing your way is the only way. Thanks Fran.... BTW ...you're a teddy bear..you're not that BLUNT!!

Dawn: I really don't like negative remarks... it's not necessary and only shows that the person doing it is only drawing attention to themselves....in a negative way...so no skin off your back :) :) I also agree that it shows me who I will NOT trust with a client I'm referring. :)

Sally,

Well said. Rudeness and being disrespectful can easily be avoided.

Hey Richard....I think I just don't want to hang around with people like that...in business or in life....it tends to rub off on ya! :)

hi Sally, oh yeah! Why do some people think social networking gives them a license to abandon common sense & decency? Especially when the kind of behavior you describe just makes them look like a social pinhead! ;-) Later...

marti: hugs for you...you are on the same wave length :) I just don't get it marti....and they still defend their bullying position as "stating my opinion" lol. Well, we have some opinions too :)

Some lately are not following these rules. I guess they haven't read this blog of yours yet Sally. Hopefully bad behavior will be minimal here.

I'm so glad you wrote this, Sally. I came upon a blog earlier today that just made me cringe as I scrolled through and read some of the author's responses to comments that were left. Just seems so unnecessary and unprofessional to me. I hope he reads this post!

Sally--It never seems to end...Do unto others as you would have done to you just doesn't catch on with some. :)

Gary: I think not too! lol! Ah...but the ones who steer clear are usually the ones that do it :)

Peggy: I hope so too...there are a few that I hope read it too...I have many a time written about this same subject...but alas....the human race needs variety lol!

Teri: Yeah...writing for deaf eyes lol!

Woo Hoo, I certainly agree. I noticed as I gain in years on the planet that I have become less demonstrative and actually surround myself with people that respect others opinions. And it may not be as sublime as it appears, for when we express our ideas in a manner that encourages others to consider them as well as we to consider others opinions as a real possibility, we can actually learn more,even about our own ideas and opinions. Sometimes our viewpoint gets shored up and other times they are proved wrong but when shared and done in respectful ways, people are all to willing to teach and learn themselves.

That's why many love you William :) That's the whole point and you got it.....we all learn from each other....and it stops when one side....is one sided :)

HUGS!

Sally - Great reminders, it is not so much what you say it is more about the delivery. Treating others the way you would like to be treated is a great model to follow. Have a great weekend.

FEB

Sally, Some folks just don't like to play well with others... What can I say...

I've flagged as a feature....as I think ALL AR members should read this one....I've seen some rude comments lately.

Aloha Sally—I decided sometime ago to remove myself from negative, bad mannered people. I'm not a Pollyanna, but I like myself and my life. I don't want to waste any minute of it with bullies or nay-sayers. Great post!

The splinter in my eye clouds my perspective. Rule # 1: remove the splinter. Call it as you see it knowing that tact is paramount. Great Post

Hi SalSal !! -- Yep - total agreement.

I encourage differing opinions, especially in the comments, but always with and underlying expectation that the comments will be delivered in a respectful fashion.

You disagree with me ? No problem at all !!!

... you berate me and use disrespectful words to convey your differing opinion ? ... we may well have a problem :o)

Thankfully the majority 'get it' and have the mature ability to debate fairly.

.... but we know what just a few bad apples can do...

Cheers Salllyyyy !!!!!

Sheldon

Sally unfortunately there are a few know it all's here in the Rain that seem to take great pleasure in trying to embarrass others. There is a way of correcting without embarrassing, and what they don't seem to realize is that they really embarrass themselves when they do it in a mean spirited way. I like to refer to them as the self proclaimed AR Police.

George: Yeah I know...it's been that way...although it doesn't hurt for me to put it out there ...time and again...in hopes that it gets a word or two across. :)

Sheldon!!!! That's how I am...I welcome comments...and they can disagree all they like...but do it rudely and they get zapped :)

Claude: That was wonderful! REMOVE THE SPLINTER! :) It's great to opens ones mind....see things in a different perspective I do believe :)

Linda: You and me both! I love to hang with lovers of life :) Waiting for your arrival :)

Hey Rebecca: Yup...it's supposedly why it balances out our world....I think I'd like a little more lopsided world with more positive energy :)

Michael: Well, then...they won't be able to play in my sandbox then :) :)

Thanks Jennifer! It sure is a wise saying :)

Being respectful is important - most important when you disagree with someone. Good point!

MAR

Interesting post, thanks for the good read.

Sincerely,

Tom Braatz

GAry: Yes it is....thanks.

Tom: Thanks.

I like your little brother, and both of you have a way of saying things from one end of the spectrum to the other.......but not disrespectfully :)

Kathy...oh, yeah...don't we all. HUG.

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Celeste "SALLY" Cheeseman HAWAII Relocations & Real Estate

Mililani, HI

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Century 21 Liberty Homes

Address: 95-221 Kipapa Drive, Mililani, HI, 96789

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Reading my blog will give you the human side of this Real Estate Industry Professional as well as allowing you to walk beside me through my writing about Hawaii Real Estate & our Local Area. As a resident of Honolulu County Hawaii for 42 years you will get a tour of a lifetime. Specializing in Hawaii Relocation Military VA Home Buyers you can be rest assured you will be in good hands. I LISTEN to YOUR needs and give you sound advice. Hawaii Relocations, Hawaii Military Relocations, Mililani Hawaii Real Estate, Living in Hawaii, Army Navy Air Force Marines in Hawaii. Read more at www.cheesemanhomes.com

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