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A Channukah primer for goyim.
Many of y'all are confused, when it comes to Channukah, and you don't know what to say, nor how to react to your Jewish friends and colleagues.  So, as a public service, I'm offering some of these potential questions/responses for goyim (here's your first lesson... "goyim" is a word we Jews use to refer to, literally, anyone else other than Jews.  It's Yiddish for "nations"... and it really means "all of the rest of you"!)
When does Channukah begin?
Well, this year, Channukah beings tonight (December 12).  And as with all Jewish holidays, it begins at sundown.  That's so we don't have to refer to our fancy watches, world-wide, to determine when the holiday begins.  All over the world, it begins when the sun sets. Why doesn't Channukah start on December 12th every year?
Great question.  Jewish holidays are not based on the Roman calendar (don't get me started on how Jews feel about the Romans), they follow the lunar calendar.  Since the lunar calendar doesn't line-up, the date jumps around year-to-year.  Some years, Channukah is close to Christmas, and every now and then Channukah can be super early, or super late.  How do you spell this holiday?  I see it spelled differently ... more

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