Frozen Yogurt ~ Beware of the Addiction !!

Services for Real Estate Pros with Re/Max North Orange County

When choosing which foods to consume, I generally seek the most nutrient-rich provisions. My rations serve as fuel, which I use to power my complex, highly efficient, ass-kicking machine.   I especially enjoy protein-rich foodstuffs full of real down-home flavors: be they salty, gamey, or grizzlish. I've even been known to enjoy goat milk iced cream, which manages to be both salty and gamey! What I don't like and what I will not tolerate, is Ed's recent infatuation with this God-awful frozen yogurt craze.   

My nephew, Bastian, returned from his Rumspringa and turned Ed onto the white stuff. Now, I consider myself an open-minded person. I'm willing to tolerate the concept of yogurt, if only because of the obvious health benefits of eating live bacteria cultures and absorbing their life force. But frozen yogurt, at least the variety Ed and Bastian fancy, is made from a powder and contains no live bacteria, no nutrients, and not even a trace of flu virus that could exercise the immune system. In spite of its frivolousness, I might be willing to indulge Ed's misguided addiction now and again, if the frozen yogurt wasn't so girly.  Ed has a hard enough time being respected by fellow males without a public obsession with spa food. Plus it tastes disgusting!

Of course the frozen yogurt store does its best to cover up the horrible taste with a variety of toppings, both sweet and fruity. Although, when I asked for beets on mine, they looked at me like I was requesting ketchup. Oh yeah, like a delicious Pennsylvania vegetable is a weirder dessert topping than some exotic fruit that doesn't even grow in the contiguous United States--what kind of idiot uses coconut for anything other than fighting off predators or dissenters on a desert island?  And regardless, the very notion that you can mask the too-tart taste, is kind of like putting a suit on a lion: no matter how you dress it up, if it comes into contact with your body, it will wreak havoc on your intestines. It gives Ed horrible gas. So do yourself a favor, avoid frozen yogurt at all costs. If you have a friend or family member who eats the stuff, help them beat the habit the Schrute way: mercilessly ridicule them until they lose their appetite altogether.


This entry hasn't been re-blogged:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
edward pascual
frozen yogurt
dwight k schrute regional virtual assistant to the agent inspection engineer remax noc

Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Spam prevention
Show All Comments
Tina Maraj
RE/MAX North Orange County - Fullerton, CA
#1 Selling Agent in Fullerton 2016 714-403-7901

Beets...i asked for beets at Yougurtland and they looked at me funny!

Apr 24, 2009 02:07 AM #1
Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Show All Comments

What's the reason you're reporting this blog entry?

Are you sure you want to report this blog entry as spam?


Dwight Schrute

Ask me a question
Spam prevention

Additional Information