He Said I'm Not Cool - Can You Believe It?

By
Services for Real Estate Pros with Marketing 4 Realtors

As of 9:08 p.m. EST on Thursday, April 30, 2009, I am officially no longer cool.  I know - it's a shocker!

While talking to our 14 year old about the Garfield Heights Middle School 8th Grade Dance, I started talking about what he was going to wear. He wants to wear a suit (a NICE one, Mom!).  He wants his Dad to take him (NOT you, Mom!).  He does NOT want me taking pictures outside or showing up at the dance to take pictures of him (only in the house, Mom!).  I look at my husband and calmly asked "What's HIS problem with me tonight?"  Instead of letting his Dad answer, Kennyth pipes up with "Because you are SO not cool and I don't want people to know!"

I suppose that should have hurt my feelings, huh?  I suppose I should have come back with something snarky like "Right back atcha, bub!"  I didn't though.

I realize that I am not as young as I was when I suffered through labor and delivery with him (isn't that what all mothers are supposed to say about their childbirth?).  I realize that I don't wear the latest trendy outfits anymore, if I ever did - but that's probably a topic for another post.  (I spend my days in sweats or jeans and t-shirts, covered in milk stains, various food residue, baby spit-up, and other things that I don't want to go into here.)  I realize that I'm strict - my kids aren't allowed to free-roam.  (They get taken to and picked-up from wherever they go by either me or their dad, they can't walk anywhere that is more than a block from our house, they've never ridden a bus alone except the school bus, they don't spend the night at just anybody's house, we monitor their telephone usage, they don't watch any movie unless we've seen it first, and they are not allowed to use the Internet unless one of us is monitoring.  All my rules.)

Instead of that quippy comeback, I simply said, "That's fine. You may think I'm "SO not cool" (yes, I used the finger quotes) but guess what?  I don't have to be. But when you bring home your first real girlfriend, I'll be "SO not cool" and tell her all the great stories I have lined up about her "SO cool" boyfriend.  So talk to the hand!  HOLLER!"

That didn't go over so well.  But YOU think I'm cool, don't you??  (Just say yes, make me feel better!)

~Renae - Market 4 Real!
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Comments (18)

Cindy Jones
Integrity Real Estate Group - Woodbridge, VA
Pentagon, Fort Belvoir & Quantico Real Estate News

Absolutely!  Here was my retort to my daughter when I became "uncool".....I've still got the money and if you want to borrow in of it I'd better be back on the cool list soon :-) 

May 04, 2009 01:28 PM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH@Properties - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Renee, I guess that so not cool really means great parent!

May 04, 2009 01:31 PM
Sheldon Neal
Bergen County, NJ - RE/MAX Real Estate Limited - Maywood, NJ
That British Agent Bergen County NJ

Renae you're so cool, the Eskimo's wanna be like you !!!!!

Cheers !

Sheldon

May 04, 2009 01:39 PM
Charles Stallions
Charles Stallions Real Estate Services - Pensacola, FL
850-476-4494 - Pensacola, Pace or Gulf Breeze, Fl.

Wow I am so glad you posted this I was asking myself it I was the only un cool person in the world in my 15 year olds eyes. Thanks

May 04, 2009 02:04 PM
Bob & Carolin Benjamin
Benjamin Realty LLC - Gold Canyon, AZ
East Phoenix Arizona Homes

Like the post above -- you are likely cool enough to ask for money and other favors --  perhaps you should stop giving out treats and become even more strict --   don't worry about it -- it will pass . Our 2 cents.

May 04, 2009 03:18 PM
Caren Wallace
Premier Property Group LLC - Tualatin, OR
Portland Caren Real Estate

Renae, my 25 year old son accused me of being a Facebook stalker! I had to back off. Actually both of my grown children appreciate my gentle but strong hand in raising them. They are now very productive and successful adults!

May 04, 2009 11:08 PM
Mike Saunders
Retired - Athens, GA

Renae - so not cool, just like a mother;^) But to so boldly threaten him, he will really have to be serious about someone to bring her home. He wants to wear a nice suit.! Now that is the shocker!

May 05, 2009 12:07 AM
Laura Gray
RE/MAX Realty Group - Gaithersburg, MD

Renae - Giirrrrl , don't you know that mothers are never cool. Not until your kids are thirty + and they have kids of their own.

May 05, 2009 01:09 AM
Cheri Smith
Prudential Gary Greene, Cypress TX - Cypress, TX
Realtor Prudential Gary Greene

Like you, I'd rather be "not cool" and raise healthy kids. We have 8 kids and the 7 year old and 10 year old still think we are cool (they aren't yet "tainted" like the 11-20 year olds are). My 10 year old says she will never ever leave us and never get married because she wants to stay with us forever. I can still kiss them goodnight and them not wipe it off! lol. I'll miss them when they are grown but kids sure can wear you out can't they. Hey, we got family pics last week! This is 6 of our kids....

May 05, 2009 04:34 AM
Carol Lee
Dilbeck Real Estate - Oak Park, CA
Realtor - Agoura, Oak Park, Westlake CA Homes

I don't see how a good parent can be "cool"- how can we set limits and be cool?  My sons are 17 and 19, and I am beyond not cool.  I am just really stupid and not worth even talking to.  My inner monologue goes like this, "They are teens, this too shall pass.  I am not stupid, and underneath all this they will some day re-discover that I love them".  Also keep in mind, which I also do daily, that teenagers are nasty because it makes it easier for you to let them leave!!

May 05, 2009 09:38 AM
Kathleen Frawley
Keller Williams 916 730-4404 Elk Grove, Wilton, Folsom, Sacramento - Wilton, CA
South County Sacramento, 916 730 4404

Oh that was funny. 14 = hormone poisoning!  I hope I'm as "not cool" as you are.

May 05, 2009 01:32 PM
Lynn911.com ~ Dallas Real Estate Agent Top Team
Dallas Houses for Rent Dallas Apartment Rentals Lynn911.com - Dallas, TX

Renae WELCOME TO REAL WORLD LOL... I got the same from my daughter WHO had melt downs HOWEVER I PULLED RANKED I am on board of school AND Grade level rep. responsible for every child.  what I loved guess who wanted to see my camera after event she did ... thankful I caught all candid moments....

May 08, 2009 04:17 PM
Brian Schulman
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage, Lancaster PA - Lancaster, PA
Lancaster County PA RealEstate Expert 717-951-5552

Don't worry, Renae, it's not your job to be considered cool by 14-year-olds!

May 20, 2009 10:38 AM
Renae Bolton
Marketing 4 Realtors - Garfield Heights, OH
I'm your Professional Real Estate Marketing VA!

So sorry for the delay in responding to everyone!  I've been terribly sick and so have 4 of our children (of course, the 4 youngest).

Cindy, that is a hilarious response!  Kennyth typically only carries on real conversations with me if he needs money, wants to go somewhere, or wants to use the computer! Then, I'm worth a conversation.

I absolutely hope that's what it means, Patricia! I'd rather be uncool and have my kids turn out to be productive members of society than cool and they all end up pregnant or in jail!

Why thank you Sheldon! That's pretty cool!

We're in an elite society, Charles - the uncool parents of the world, with kids who actually behave (for the most part!).

You're right, Bob & Carolin.  He usually has no problems asking me for stuff. But when he's older, he'll appreciate it.  I know that.  (I know that.  I know that. I know that.)

That's the end goal, isn't it Caren?  To raise productive, successful adults.  I'm on that road! Glad to hear I'm not alone!

Mike, Kennyth has always been the one who dressed very conservatively from a young age.  He always wanted to wear button down shirts to school, polo shirts, slacks. Not jeans and t-shirts. So the suit was completely expected.  I think he'll be a lawyer when he grows up.

I know that, Laura, because it was the same way with my mother.  Now I think she's the best!  But that certainly wasn't so when I was growing up.

All I can say is WOW Cheri!  EIGHT kids????  What, did you start having them when you were 12?  You look too young to have kids who are 20! I have 4 kids who are 4 or under so I still get lots of hugs and kisses that don't get wiped off.  And I agree with you 129% - they really can wear you out!  (Very nice family picture! We're doing ours this summer.)

I agree, Carol.  Most kids think "cool parents" let their children do whatever they want to do. That you have to remind yourself that you are not stupid is a comfort to me believe it or not.  I have to tell myself the same thing.  And I absolutely did NOT think about it that way - God must just be setting the scene so that I can honestly say I can't WAIT for him to move out and mean it! hahahahah

"14=Hormone poisoning!"  Now THAT was funny Kathleen!

Yes Lynn, I'm involved with lots of things at the schools as well.  I think that's part of the reason he didn't want me at the dance.  I take lots of pictures and I'm always around.  Oh well, he'll just have to deal with it!

Yep Brian, not my job!  I've been reminding myself of that a lot lately!  It's not my job to be cool.  Last night, my husband told Kennyth that it wasn't his job for Kennyth to like all of his decisions.  That, too, is true!

~Renae

May 21, 2009 01:52 AM
Rebecca Gaujot, Realtor®
Lewisburg, WV
Lewisburg WV, the go to agent for all real estate

Your job is parent (Mom) first...cool second....But, I can guess here that you are BOTH.

May 22, 2009 03:33 PM
Lynn911.com ~ Dallas Real Estate Agent Top Team
Dallas Houses for Rent Dallas Apartment Rentals Lynn911.com - Dallas, TX

Renae, I am still laughing about this post that I was ONLY PERSON who heard those words till all other mothers were suppose be left off campus... I STILL HAVE FUN tending bartender status of pouring soft drinks while us mom's sing top of our lungs words to music....

Jun 06, 2009 04:39 PM
Georgie Hunter R(S) 58089
Hawai'i Life Real Estate Brokers - Haiku, HI
Maui Real Estate sales and lifestyle info

It wouldn't matter if you were super cool, you're still going to be uncool in his eyes at that age.   But give him some more freedom, how else will he learn to do anything on his own?

Aug 14, 2009 07:35 AM
Renae Bolton
Marketing 4 Realtors - Garfield Heights, OH
I'm your Professional Real Estate Marketing VA!

Rebecca, you just made my day!  You have no idea how much I needed to hear that I was cool today.  (I needed it!)

You are too funny, Lynn!  I can hear you all right now singing while the kids are all looking on in total embarrasment!

I don't know, Georgina.  Give him rope to hang himself with or hold on tight?  He's our oldest so it is really hard letting him roam a bit.  We're trying though.  He's catching the city bus home from school now.  Freaks me out but he loves it.

~Renae

Sep 02, 2009 01:38 AM