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AVOID BURNOUT! Stop Taking Responsibility For Stuff That's Not Your Responsibility to Take!

Reblogger
Real Estate Broker/Owner with Robin Rogers, Silverbridge Realty, San Antonio, Texas 398351

Man, oh man, have I been there, and I bet you have, too! This is a very timely and well-written post (as usual) from Jennifer. I think I'll order her T-shirt in size Medium. Actually, without that monkey on my back, I could get it in a Small!

Original content by Jennifer Allan-Hagedorn

It's not my monkey!

The other day I had a three-way conversation with two agents who are in the middle of career crises. Both are trying to decide whether to stay or go, interestingly, for opposite reasons. AgentFriend1 has too much business and is burning out and AgentFriend2, well, doesn't. Have too much business, that is. And she's burning out, too.

We talked about burnout and both agents confessed that they become deeply involved in their clients' personal situations and get sucked into the emotional drama of it all. Which isn't uncommon in our business; after all, we ARE deeply involved in the whole mess - if our seller doesn't have enough equity to properly price; if our buyer's loan changes and they have to come up with an additional 5% down; if our listing doesn't appraise and the deal crashes... yes, these events DO affect us both financially and emotionally. And frankly, if they didn't affect us, we probably wouldn't be effective at our jobs.

But you can draw a line and preserve your sanity. Terry Watson calls it "the Monkey." He describes how we wrongly let others put their monkeys on our backs - even though we have our own monkeys to deal with, thank you very much! We real estate agents are really good at accepting our clients' monkeys as our own.

And you know what? Our clients are HAPPY to give us their monkeys and then blame us when things go wrong. Further, we accept that blame - which puts us in a position where we have to apologize for our inability to solve a problem that ISN'T OURS TO SOLVE.

Here's an example. The seller owes $415,000 on his home. The market value is no more than $395,000 and that's pushing it. In order to break even, the seller needs to sell in the $430,000 at least. The seller "doesn't want to do a short sale," so he looks to his agent for another solution. What solution does the agent come up with?

1.       Price at $439,900 and hope for a miracle

2.       Reduce her commission to nothing and price at $420,000 (and hope for a miracle)

Of course, there are other solutions, but we monkey-acceptors want to please, so these are the ones we propose. (And then we're miserable because we have an unsellable product, but that's another story).

Here's another example. You interview for a tenant-occupied listing. The seller doesn't want to inconvenience the tenant, so he asks for a 24-hour showing requirement; for day-time showings only; that you attend all showings, and a 60-day possession. You want to please the seller, so you agree, knowing what he's asking will make the properly unmarketable... and you miserable.

Do too many of these deals and I think burnout IS an inevitability.

Of course, it's easy to advise "Well, just thank the %$SOB^# very much for the opportunity and walk away!" I hear that advice all the time, and sure, that's an option. But there's a better way... a way to respectfully decline the monkey and move forward without alienating someone who could be a wonderful client and future referral source.

Stay tuned...

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Robin Rogers, REALTOR, Broker-owner, TRC, MRP, CRS

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Comments (3)

Steve, Joel & Steve A. Chain
Chain Real Estate Investments & Mortgage, Steve & Joel Chain - Cottonwood, CA

Robin,  I think it takes real wisdom to separate the"monkeys" from those unique services that we provide that set us apart, even within our own industry.  My wife as said that I do too much for people.  My personal opinion is most of the service I provide to my clients is what they are "unable" to do for themselves at a given time and situation and actually is "life giving to me" when I do it.  I view those services the essential services that without them the transaction won't happen.  Although I think it's those issues, that you brought up, that drain you and provide no benefit to your client that must be left alone as you said

Sep 11, 2009 01:54 AM
Shirley Parks
Sands Realty 210-414-0966 - San Antonio, TX
Broker, 210-414-0966, San Antonio TX Real Estate

Hi Robin, This is so true.  I missed this the first time so thanks for reblogging.

Sep 11, 2009 11:43 AM
Sharon Parisi
United Real Estate Dallas - Dallas, TX
Dallas Homes

The challenges of a real estate career are many.  I look upon those challenges as learning experiences and opportunities to satisfy the needs of my clients.

Sep 14, 2009 08:48 AM