How To Be Happy, And Let Go

Services for Real Estate Pros with Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance

picI have come to discover through personal experience that happiness is a moment-by-moment event. Happiness is not some fixed state, but it is an ongoing process. What do we even mean by happiness? Here is one definition that I like a lot: Happiness is a moment-by-moment feeling of well-being.

As human beings, we are constantly searching for this feeling that we refer to as "happiness." All living organisms desire to feel good and are continually searching for how to feel good. Unfortunately, when we are not feeling good, and often chronically not feeling good, we turn to destructive habits, such as over-eating, over-drinking, over-TV watching, just to name a few.

We become tense and frustrated, angry and even upset. The worse we feel, the worse decisions we make, and the less we get what we want in life. And then the worse we feel. Pretty frustrating, right?

Fortunately, there is a way out. And it starts with generating feelings of "well-being." These feelings of well-being can be just a thought away, quite literally. We can make choices as subtle as picking another thought to improve our state of mind. We can also take actions that will help improve our mood.

So how does all of this talk of happiness and well-being relate to Intention? Intentions are most effective when you set the intention, and then get out of the way. Let the universe handle the details. The universe will orchestrate the fulfillment of your desires, but if you are attempting to control the outcome, you will completely miss the orchestration that the universe is conducting.

Now for those of you who have been pursuing a spiritual path for a while, this is not news. Spiritual teachers have been sharing this news for years. And yet there is always the question that is repeated over and over again is, "How do I let go?"

It is a question that is usually asked with pain and much frustration:

"How to heck to I let go of something I really, really want?"
" How can I get what I want if I let go?"
" Won't I lose my desire?"
" Won't I not get it?"
" Isn't the whole point of fulfilling my desire having the desire in the first place?"
" And how am I supposed to let go of it anyway?"

I understand the frustration - I sincerely do as I have been in a very similar place. Yet I have discovered a beautiful thing: you really can let go. And the more you let go, the more you can allow, the easier everything will be and the more you can allow the universe to handle the details for you.

So here are a few suggestions on how to let go, and I am going to tie it back into happiness:

* Know that you can change your STORY any time, any place. For example, when you find yourself stuck on something, a negative thought, a negative feeling, a negative behavior, remind yourself that you can drop that negative thought, that you can let go of the negative feeling, and then focus on feeling good. In that moment, ask yourself "What can I do to make myself feel good?" (What will make you feel good will change depending on the circumstance, but always ask yourself, "What will make me feel good right now?")
Here are some suggestions that I have been using in my own life:

  • Step away from that computer! Seriously, we all recognize that technology is amazing, but when you spend long hours in front of one, it is important to take a break and make sure there is more to life than the virtual.
  • Get outside. There is nothing like a brisk walk in the sunshine, even if for a few minutes - it can do wonders for your mood.
  • Spend time with friends. Loving human interaction has a tremendous impact on all areas of health and well-being.
  • Focus on creating time for what YOU enjoy. It might be music; it might be exercise; it might be reading, and it is probably a combination of many things. Remind yourself that your feeling good is important - the better you feel, the more you can give, and the greater impact you can make in the world.

Obviously, there are a lot of times when we can't immediately change what we are doing - we have kids to take care of, parents to take care of, health challenges, economic realities, whatever they may be. When you find yourself in a situation you can't change, shift your focus to being. We must realize that we are not human thinkings, nor human feelings, nor human doings, but a human beings. Picture an infant who is simply happy to be (when they are not crying, that is!) Try shifting your focus to being, and think about someone or something that you love. It could be a person, your pet, a favorite place, anything that generates a sincere feeling of love in your heart... and focus on that.

The feeling of love and affection immediately creates a physical feeling of well-being, and you can carry it with you wherever you are, whatever the circumstance. Repeat the following mantra to remind yourself:

Being Love, Being Love, Being Love

Love Being, Love Being, Love Being

Over time and with practice, you will discover that this is all you ever need-to be love. And the more you feel love in your heart, the more you reside in this place of well-being, the greater your ability to let go of your desires, and the more you let go, the more you will allow the universe to give back.

Posted by

Sharon Lee

Comments (15)

Ginger Moore
Wilkinson & Associates Realty - Gastonia, NC

What a nice inspirational blog!  I do get away from computer, but have to come back once a day to catch up on AR.. grin...  and  Yes we do need love, and need to give it to our children freely.

Sep 20, 2009 12:40 PM
John Mulkey - Waleska, GA
Housing Guru

Sharon - Nice post and a great reminder of the truths that surround us.  I have often felt that man’s greatest aspiration is to become that which he already is. If we only could recognize the power we hold, the gifts we've received, and the love that surrounds us, we could release the need to seek and just be.

Sep 20, 2009 12:44 PM
Ryan Hukill - Edmond
ShowMeOKC Real Estate Pros of KW Elite - Edmond, OK
Realtor, Team Lead

Great post! It's good to reflect on our definitions and where we're headed in life. Thanks for sharing!

Sep 20, 2009 01:06 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Thank you Ginger-I do as well and have more recently and it is wonderful. Of course Active Rain and all the people I have met is what keeps me coming back. I also work on a computer all day so it is nice to get away. Thank you for the comment.<SMILE>

Hi John-I love that. I believe you are SO right. Thank you for the wonderful comment. <SMILE>

Hi Ryan-Thank you for your comment. It is very good indeed. <SMILE>

Sep 20, 2009 01:08 PM
Tim Lorenz
TIM LORENZ - Elite Home Sales Team - Mission Viejo, CA
949 874-2247

I love inspirational blogs love the picture it is truly a great post.

Sep 20, 2009 01:24 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi Tim-Thank you so much for stopping by and for the compliment. Appreciate it. <SMILE>

Sep 20, 2009 01:26 PM
Mary Douglas
United Country Ponderosa Realty, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado - Red Feather Lakes, CO
REALTOR, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado

Hi Sharon, very well written and terrific message.  Like the Beatles said: "All you need is Love".

Sep 20, 2009 03:14 PM
Jenny Kotulak
RE/MAX Real Estate Centre Inc., Brokerage - Oakville, ON
Broker - Oakville Ontario Real Estate

Hi Sharon, Ditto what Mary said.  I was excited to take my daughter back to college today so I could take a walk by the lake near where she lives.  It got dark though and I missed some great photo ops.  I can't wait to go back during daylight hours. 

I know it sounds like something so simple and trivial to look forward to but like you said we all need to focus on creating time to do things that we enjoy.

Sep 20, 2009 04:17 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi Mary-That is most definitely what the world needs more of. Have a great week my friend. Thank you for your friendship and support. <SMILE>

Hi Jenny-Thank you so much. We do indeed and I am doing that more and more. Thank you for visiting. <SMILE>

Sep 20, 2009 04:41 PM
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth

Love and happiness land on your finger like a butterfly when you stop chasing them...

Sep 21, 2009 09:15 AM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi Gary-They sure do. Thank you for the visit. <SMILE>

Sep 21, 2009 01:09 PM
JL Boney, III
Coldwell Banker - Columbia, SC
Columbia, SC Real Estate

Letting go is always the hardest thing that people will do in this life, but it is a necessary step in our progress.

Sep 22, 2009 05:53 AM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi JL-It is SO VERY HARD but as you said a necessary step in moving forward in life. Hope you are doing well my friend. Have a great Wednesday. <SMILE>

Sep 22, 2009 10:26 AM
Chris Minion
O'Brien Realty - Lexington Park, MD

Hello Sharon,

What a wonderful post!  Very well written and a terrific message.  Thank you for sharing it with us. 


Nov 04, 2009 02:38 PM
Sharon Lee
Sharon Lee's Virtual Assistance - Jonesborough, TN
Retired and loving life

Hi Chris-You are quite welcome and thank you for the very nice message. <SMILE> Also thank you for adding me as an associate.

Nov 04, 2009 03:08 PM