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Reflections of a Coffee-drinking Narcissist - Do You Look Good Naked?

By
Services for Real Estate Pros with ha media group

It appears that I owe quite a few people on AR an apology...

What started out as my seemingly innocuous idea with creating the coffee drinkers network for like-minded folks has resulted in quite a few hurtful jabs thrown in all directions, secret and not-so-secret groups and chats popping up where one is free to throw stones, etc.

Now, I say "seemingly innocuous" when it comes to the intent behind my site because there is probably no such thing as absolutely pure intentions, for one.  For another, truth be told, I thought it would be rather fun to laugh at some of the more asinine comments and outbursts by the right-wingers, the tea-drinkers, the birthers et al.

Only, none of it was supposed to be directed at specific people, but rather the sentiments voiced.  Nonetheless, personal it turned and spawned ugly offspring on both sides of the political divide, just as angry and hurtful, just as driven by the mob of majority-bully-like thirst for blood.

With all this being said, I am sorry for initiating that which serves no purpose and ultimately makes all of us look and feel like jackasses, or at least, it should...

I was lucky these last few weeks to not have had access to the Internet, so I was forced to take a break from it all.  I learned that there are very, very few of you whose words I found myself missing, and fewer still whom I consider my friends, and with whom I'd want to share a non-virtual cup o'joe.  None of it is predicated on your politics, or mine.  It's simply a feeling of connecting, of knowing you in some way, of being able to read between the lines you share on these pages.  These connections, albeit few, are what makes the whole experience of vomiting words into the virtual universe worthwhile...  That's it, for me, in a nutshell.

Every once in a while I, too, get caught up in mad Diaghilev's greatest sin - that craving for "not universal love, but to be loved alone..."  I suck up your praises or revel in your frustrations at certain arguments.  But, at the end of the day, the only thing I can know with any degree of certainty is that none of us have a moral superiority over our fellow men....

There is something to be said for the doctrine of individualism, and it has nothing to do with economic models: one has to only be true to the innermost impulses of one's soul to be worthy of the free will we've all being endowed with.  One, in the end, is utterly alone, and when every hurtful word gleefully thrown at someone else stares you in the mirror - it'll darken in silence to you alone.  There are no cheerleaders in our hearts, nor bullies.  Would we be as brave and callous without the benefit of distance and anonymity of zeros and ones?

To bring this back to the original point of this post - I am sorry to everyone, no matter what side, for being the catalyst for this incessant river of vitriol.  I am sorry, too, that so many people found joy in petty insults, in stealthy attacks, in schoolyard-style bullying.  I am sorry that I've lost respect for some of you through it all.

My only wish, at this point, is that we can nurse our wounds with some dignity, and if any shots must be fired, we do not aim at the backs of those we disagree with, present company included...  That's the least any of us who believe in basic decency can muster.

Thank you for listening.

 

Comments (64)

Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Simon - this is for you:-)

Oct 08, 2009 05:53 AM
Bruce Walter
Keller Williams Realty Lafayette/West Lafayette, Indiana - West Lafayette, IN

Simon, don't you dare reciprocate!

Oct 08, 2009 07:40 AM
Alexander Harb
Knights Investing - Mesquite, TX
Dallas, Texas Real Estate Investing

In the past I have read SOME of the insults you have mentioned in this post that occurred in the network and in groups... in principle at least and personally being attacked by some of the people who believe (or may still believe in them and in staying caustic about the delivery of such principles) in doing things this way at worst......

I briefly participated in the attacks myself because I had my own point of view and THOUGHT that I had to communicate the same way to those who spoke in such a hurtful way, but then saw what was happening and quickly distanced my self from the carnage that resulted. I even had to flag others comments whom I saw were continuing to attack others and myself in the ActiveRain© membership.

I am so glad that I did distance myself from the darkness of what had been a personal and religious witch hunt against me and some others.. I have made amends with some of those who were at the heart of what happened, BUT sadly I am not sure of the standing of some of the people who misunderstood what I said in comments and on the phone when we had spoken and I had tried to speak in a way they did not comprehend at the time.... they may NEVER come to understanding the idea(s) I was trying to get across to them... BUT... such is life.... I will continue to move on and not let the past bring me down OR slow me down.

I am ALWAYS open to meaningful and constructive dialog. I will NEVER again devolve into the actions and speech I did before...as it hurt a BUNCH of very special relationships I had with some members of The ActiveRain Real Estate Network©. I am so sorry that situation ever happened approximately one and a half years ago. I am still hoping for reconciliation with those whom had been hurt by what had happened between us such a long time ago. Even though what happened in the past cannot be undone ~~~ time, love and forgiveness heals ALL wounds... that is my wish and my prayer....

Inna... may you continue to progress and change more and more into a more gorgeous human being as you continue to unabashedly live out your principles which you learned in your native land and as you continue to learn ~~~ because you seem to NEVER want to stop growing as a person.... I pray our Creators best for you.......

Alex H.

Oct 08, 2009 11:53 PM
Gary L. Waters Broker Associate, Bucci Realty
Bucci Realty, Inc. - Melbourne, FL
Eighteen Years Experience in Brevard County

OK, the title got my attention. I guess I missed the place where I am supposed to take any of the comments on here serious! And, I do look good naked..to any blind 80 year old woman!

Oct 11, 2009 02:26 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Sorry for the late reply - didn't get my notices...

Bruce - Simon knows what's good for him - he wouldn't dare reciprocate:-)

Alex - thank you for your heartfelt comment.  I noticed you are on speaking terms again, and that makes me extremly happy, as much as don't care for the person in question, I am glad you both found a way to move beyond the hurt... Best,

Gary - nope, nothing serious in the comments.... This was sort of a niche argument with myself, really, nothing to pay attention to:-) You funny-

Oct 11, 2009 02:50 AM
Todd Mack
Coral Springs, FL
Property Manager Assistant

I like the title of your post!

Very funny!!

Peace,

Todd

Oct 11, 2009 05:43 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Todd - well, thank you, thank you...

Titles are my specialty:-)  Good to meet yah, and yeah, peace-

Oct 11, 2009 06:11 AM
AZ Mortgage Broker: Michael George
Arizona Wholesale Mortgage Inc. - Phoenix, AZ
AZ Mortgage Rates

Hi Inna--  I know what you are saying here...  There has been a lot of vitriol and hate-filled speech.  I hope I wasn't one of the bad ones.  I don't recall doing any name-calling.

I do recall a lot of laughing though.  Like you said, the teabaggers and birthers are always good for a laugh.

Oct 13, 2009 05:29 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Michael - nope, you are fine:-)  If this was nothing but a nifty SNL sketch, I'd laugh, and laugh freely.  But since the baggers and birthers actually exist and mean what they say, such as it is, it's more like watching a lousy horro flick...

Oct 13, 2009 05:35 AM
Broker Nick
South Florida Real Estate & Development, Inc. - Coconut Creek, FL
Broker Nick Relocation Broker Service

Hey watch it Inna, I stood up for you when others dogged you, that should count for something.

Oct 13, 2009 06:32 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Nick - you did?  Your sense of honor and altruism befuddles me, then...

I don't care for you, Nick, and yes, all I have to base it on is what I've seen you post here.  It's not your views, but your tone towards some members of the human race.  I don't see why I need to "watch" it, or what it is that I need to "watch".

Oct 13, 2009 06:38 AM
Broker Nick
South Florida Real Estate & Development, Inc. - Coconut Creek, FL
Broker Nick Relocation Broker Service

It was a joke Inna...like hey, watch it that hurts....ok. I am sorry you don't care for me Inna, have nothing but good things to say about you. But, I don't agree with your views on politics and religion, and I don't see anything wrong with calling someone a puzzlewit, when they won't listen to what you have to say after repeated tries.

But my "tone" towards some members of the human race? are they human? 

I gues that is my sense of honor and altruism that befuddles you?

 

Oct 13, 2009 06:49 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Nick - I am glad it was a joke then.  As for your tone, you know it has nothing to do with the rather lame, yet harmless puzzlewit.  Regardless, Nick, I feel no need or desire to kiss anyone's ass, including yours.  I believe if we are all honest instead or feeling the need to be politically correct, we are better of, in all the ways that count, that's all.

I am simply being honest.

Oct 13, 2009 07:16 AM
Simon Conway
Orlando Area Real Estate Services - Orlando, FL

Me and Katie at the beach

JUST FOR YOU INNA - Yep, that's me reciprocating... with my Lab Katie at the Daytona Doggie Beach. It's up to you to figure out if I'm wearing more than a hat! *lol*

Oct 13, 2009 07:49 AM
Broker Nick
South Florida Real Estate & Development, Inc. - Coconut Creek, FL
Broker Nick Relocation Broker Service

Oh my, now Inna charmed your clothes off Simon, hope its not contagious here in AR?

Oct 13, 2009 08:29 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

Well, Simon, I detect coverup, that being a necklace and a cute dog:-)

Nick - so do I get my prize now?

Oct 13, 2009 08:38 AM
Anonymous
Jon

Nick:  Tomorrow is Whip'em-Out-Wednesday, so you're up!  Let's see what'cha got.  ;)

Active Rain
Get to know your Realtor.
No, REALLY!

Oct 13, 2009 08:42 AM
#66
Simon Conway
Orlando Area Real Estate Services - Orlando, FL

*LOL*

Oct 13, 2009 08:43 AM
Lisa Rapose
ReDesign To Sell (TM) - Woodstock, CT

Oh geez...  missed sumthin' good didn't I?  ;o)

Jan 04, 2010 01:19 AM
Inna Hardison
ha media group - Orlando, FL
Wordpress for Real Estate & Design, Print HaMedia Group

OMG - my sweet Lisa is back:-)  Yep, you did, but more importantly, you've been missed!!!

Jan 04, 2010 01:36 AM