Keeping the Flame Alight

Real Estate Agent with Churchill-Brown & Associates - Nichols Hills

A realtor friend of mine who's with a different company was telling me the other day about how she feels like she's just in survival mode, just breaking even, doing everything she can just to get by. She's been a realtor for several years - when more business came to us than the other way around - and she's struggling. She kept talking about not quite knowing where to turn to, what action to take, how to prioritize and get back to being productive.

Later that evening as I was getting ready for bed - a time where, as I'm shutting down and clearing my mind, it often happens that a little flash of insight will come to me. What came to me was her approach, the frame of mind, her focus on what was NOT happening. What came to me was that her focus could be on what wasn't happening or she could be focusing on where she wanted to go. The end result might finally be the same - increased productivity, more clients, more closings, more security, more fun - but how we approach the end result we want can be resourceful and empowering or limiting and depressing.

What she was focusing on was being in survival, the struggle, trying hard to build her business back up just so she could "break even." What came to me was the flip side. What about, instead of focusing on how hard things have become, the struggle, being in survival...what if underneath that focus was a positive parallel, sort of like a high road and a low road? Her interpreting of her situation could be that she's struggling & dissatisfied or the same feelings could just as easily be an inner DRIVE for expansion, evolution, creativity and freedom - a very strong urgency to improve her productivity & efficiency that would lead her back to a profession she enjoyed and the satisfying, enjoyable life she wants.

Underneath the struggle, the dissatisfaction, the focus on the difficult is the desire for improvement. She could either focus on what wasn't happening or turn that focus toward the light - towards what can happen, towards the opportunities.

It resonated with me as well & I saw where I had and occasionally have a similar outlook and I called her right then to share it with her and immediately light bulbs started going off for both of us.

I'm grateful that she shared her struggle with me. Not so I could commiserate - because where's resourcefulness in commiserating? - but because in her sharing, we were each able to tap into some of that wonderful creative energy that often comes with collaborating & how sharing and support (much like the Active Rain community) helps me keep my flame alight.



Comments (3)

Jason Romrell
Business Attorney and Success Advisor - Los Angeles, CA

LOVE the thought process here. Most thoughts have a flip side, and in your example you found the positive, uplifting and motivating side of your friend's plight.  Great way to turn it around and drive action in the right direction.

Dec 10, 2009 03:26 AM
Greg Saffell
Tucson, AZ
Real Estate Professional Tucson, Oro Valley AZ

Mark, It's easy to get discouraged with our market as it is today. Business is tough and so is life, so what's new. I'm glad that you were there for your friend, we all need the encouragement. Now, your friend can pass it along to someone else when they need help. Pay it forward, what a great concept. Happy Holidays my friend.

Dec 10, 2009 03:26 AM
Edward & Celia Maddox
The Celtic Connection Realty - Queen Creek, AZ

Thanks for the article. We are always learning new information from Active Rain Blogs. Best Regards,

Dec 10, 2009 03:29 AM