How to Deal With a Potentially Violent Client

"Violent clients"??!!  I don't serve that particular segment of the buying public, or selling public for that matter.  I'm NOT going to be someone's whipping boy.

Sean:  Interesting post.  Sounds like you did a good job of calming him down.  I'm not sure I could have been as patient.

Yeah I'm out of there if I sense hostility, that is a case of something that can only go from bad to worse.

Why would you even consider working with someone who has such little regard for you or what you do?

We are dealing with peoples emotions and some times they get a little excited, I can handle that. I haven't had a violent client yet. If I did , we are done RIGHT NOW.

I had a very wierd situation a few years back where I represented the seller and the buyer who had their own representation started stalking my seller.

My seller broker the cardinal rule when I had warned of getting close to the buyer during negotiations.

The buyer unknown to her agent and myself after the fact ,would stop by the house and ask to bring in a relative from out of town to look thru the home or would stop and chat.

There is quite a history with the buyer but not enough space or time to write about it.

It did get to the point where we almost cancelled the escrow and come very near to getting a restraining order.

The escrow did close and my sellers were able to move on but it became really eerie...

I won't deal with a client who has a violent temper or one who like to throw out the "If I don't like something I'll just sue you." phrase....I don't have time or patience for the threats, I tell them point blank that I won't work with them and to go bother someone else.

Also  there is a BIG difference of a client being under stress and perhaps becoming agitated to one who actually shows violent episodes or intent....

I have worked with many clients who have responded in ways that in a normal escrow would not have but due to the pressure have responses that were out of character......NOT violence

In particular in short sale listings we are dealing with very distraught clients. Most who do not want to lose their homes. Many have lost their jobs.  I can deal with that.

I had one seller about 5 yrs ago  call me up after we received a full price offer for her home and went off on a tangent that I was in cohoots with the buyers agent and waited til the home was on the MLS to bring in an offer...Huh???????? Literally she screamed and yelled at me and  to make a long story short and it did get worse before better, this woman really intensified her misguided anger and hostility to the point that I wrote her a letter and stated this.....If this escrow falls out for any reason, just know that I will no longer represent you as a listing agent. I will not be badgered, harassed and yelled out for doing my job. I stopped receiving her phone calls.

I did receive a vm and letter apologizing and she backed off. This home was not sold in distress. I have absolutely no idea other than she had friends who did not like realtors influence her .......

She was more than just questioning things.....It was like a complete personality change from when I met with her and her husband originally. It was accusatory on every level.

This is why I interview clients now as well as they interview me. I always leave a "way out clause" in my listing contracts for both. 

I am pretty good at turning peole around. BUT if I can't then I just don't work with them. My life is too short and I have many other people I can help that I actually like. I rarely deal with diffcult people any more.

Like so many of the comments that you have received I am not a fan --- of working with hostile individuals. Life is short and I would rather not be around someone that is less than respectful.

I simply do not have the patience it takes to deal with people like that.  My tolerance levels are very low.  lol  I think that if I couldn't get the client to calm down and act somewhat rationally, I would simply tell them our conversation was over a,d they should fine someone else to work with.  Life is just way too short.

I have to agree with a lot of these posts. If I thought someone was potentially violent I would say goodbye. In 14 years I can't recall ever coming in contact with anyone that I thought was potentially violent...maybe it's the small town atmosphere.

Sean, I pulled out my list of all the REALTORS in my area and handed it to an irate seller once as I reached for my keyboard saying "Mr. Seller, I am resigning as your REALTOR.  While I type up a release form, please look over that list and choose another REALTOR."  He was surprised and apologetic.  He insisted that he didn't mean to yell at me and please would I continue to work as his agent.  I agreed as long as he promised to treat me with respect and stop yelling at me.  From that day on he was always respectful. I eventually sold his house for him and sold him another.  But I don't think we should ever accept that kind of treatment.

I won't willingly deal with a violent leaning client.  But I have had client or consumers under stress that could have gone that way.  Usually, they just needed to be talked down... and listened to. 

I would not have the patience to deal with this type of client but it is interesting the tips you have learned to weather the storm.

Wow, potentially violent clients?  If I felt that would be the case, I would certainly fire them.  I can handle myself but I'm not willing to lower my standard for a few sheckles, which is what people like this most likely offer...IMHO!

There is a distinction between clients who are at their wits end and frustrated and those who would cross the threshold into violence. I am out of there when violence comes into question. Unfortunately we see so many people at their worst right now, but no one should be dealing with a physically abusive situation.

Great post! good tips for how to defuse the situation, but I hope nobody trys to do therapy when they should get out of the situation.