Things are Great! Why Do You Ask? - Part I

Things are Great!  Why Do You Ask? - Part I

I'm writing this blog in two parts, as the thoughts tie in, but I wish to keep the negative and the positive apart.

Let's start with the negative --  When someone asks you, "How's business?" are they really expecting a positive response, or hoping for a negative one?

I know it's hard for many people to understand, but I've made a lifelong study of people, and I can assure you that many of those who ask about our business, or our well-being, are actually unaware that inwardly they are anticipating and wishing for a reaction that we are not doing well!  That things are not all that great.

This does not mean that they are bad people at heart -- This is human nature.

When things are going poorly for someone and they cannot see light at the end of their personal tunnel, the only thing that will make them feel better may be to talk with someone who is worse off than they.

This is a socialistic sort of mentality, where if people are all doing the same, misery is more tolerable and their situation can be more acceptable to them.

Have you ever had someone come up and ask how you're doing?  And you respond that things are great, only to have them find a reason to exit rather quickly?  We all have!  Maybe not even realizing why.

Negative news sells more newspapers than positive news.

Like the old saying, "Misery loves company."

We all know people who we really try to avoid because they are under a cloud of doom.  Whenever I am around people like this as a necessity of working together, I first try to "pick them up," by speaking positively, but if this doesn't work, after a while, I will just frankly tell them that I am a "positive thinker" and would prefer not to hear these negatives.  Done in a friendly manner, this either changes them, or at least they stay away, and I can avoid their "stinkin' thinkin'." 

I remember once when I was a very young assistant to the vice-president of my company, and we were going out to make a personal call on one of our company's larger clients.  I made the comment to the vice-president that, "I know that our client is being solicited heavily by our competition, and I really hope we can retain the account."  What happened next taught me a lesson that I have retained all my life.  He pulled the car over to the curb, looked me in the eye, and said, "If you're going to think negative, either get out of the car right now and catch a cab back to the office, or keep your thoughts to yourself.  I cannot afford to have any negatives enter my subconscious mind." 

You know, what he did, made a lasting impression on me that has been so important in my career.  No matter how much of a positive attitude we feel we have, a negative suggestion to our subconscious mind will linger and can be a severe detriment to our performance.

I never like to speak of negatives, but this is one area that kills more professional people than any other.  Protect your subconscious mind, because it has no control of itself.