 |
|
|
|
Issue # 60 |
To Your Success |
December 2009 |
WHITE HAT - BLACK HAT Hello Clark, When people spend a great deal of time together on a regular basis, be they family, a sports team or co-workers, there is potential for disagreements and personality issues ... have you ever experienced that? I certainly have and rarely was it ever because anyone deliberately set out to create a problem. When issues do come up however they tend to negatively affect the collective group ‘energy‘, often leading to undesirable consequences.
I remember such an occasion some years back during my previous life in the automotive industry. Although we had an excellent team made up of quality individuals with mostly good intentions, we were facing a few personality related challenges. While contemplating how to deal with the situation I recalled a Saturday afternoon TV show from my childhood, during the days of black and white TV, and decided to incorporate an analogy based on that during our next team meeting. It resulted in some interesting discussion that helped clear the air.
The weekly TV series I'm referring to was from the era of Ed Sullivan and Jack Parr and, as I recall, was called Horse Opera. Each show followed the same basic formula in that there was always a good guy who wore a white hat and rode a white horse, and a bad guy who wore a black hat and rode a black horse. The regular town folk and ranch hands were nondescript, in that they wore grey hats and rode grey horses (remember, this was black and white television so everything was either black, white, or some shade of grey ... no red, blue, green or brown to be found anywhere).
Those were simpler times and the shows carried a simple message, so the good guys were purely good and the bad guys were evil through and through. Those lucky folk in the Horse Operas however could know with some degree of certainty, once they figured out the formula, that if they saw a guy with a white hat riding a white horse he could probably be trusted and if they saw a guy wearing a black hat riding a black horse he was trouble for sure.
Of course in real life such is not the case. The truth is that with very few exceptions most ‘good‘ people also have a few less than redeeming qualities and most ‘bad‘ people have some good ones.
In any case, the Horse Opera analogy nicely segued us into the question "Which traits and characteristics do we associate with those in our life we would classify as Black Hat people?" Within seconds words like dishonest, rude, cruel, disrespectful, self-centred, boastful, backbiting, untrustworthy, insincere, conniving and inconsiderate were put forward for consideration.
We debated that for a bit before we tackled the next question, "Which traits or characteristics do we associate with those we would classify as White Hat people?" Almost immediately words like honest, kind, respectful, giving, humble, honourable, trustworthy, sincere, considerate, and compassionate were offered up.
We then discussed how it felt to be around each of these types of people.
As could be expected, the comments about the Black Hats were pretty negative and the comments about the White Hats were positive. What was fascinating to me was that when we turned our attention away from discussing Black Hats and onto White Hats, the energy in the room shifted noticeably. Facial expressions changed and eyes lit up ... it was as if a dark, low lying cloud suddenly evaporated and sunlight came streaming in. It was quite amazing.
We then debated whether or not those we thought of as Black Hats actually saw themselves that way, and it was agreed that for the most part they probably did not. Regardless of how others might see them, the fact is almost everyone sees themselves as essentially good and they certainly don't deliberately set out to be bad.
Then I posed two more questions. First, "Do you see yourself as a White Hat or a Black Hat?", and of course we all defined ourselves as White Hats. Then, "Do any of us ever demonstrate any Black Hat traits or characteristics?"
Hmmm. Naturally, we quickly and easily identified such behaviours in our teammates from time to time (especially at this time) but after further discussion and some consideration, we had to admit that we ourselves were occasionally guilty also.
So here we were, people thinking of ourselves as good guys wearing white hats yet periodically behaving as someone wearing black, and so ultimately being seen by others not as White Hats at all, but rather as someone wearing non-descript grey ... someone generally good but having the potential to swing the other way in an unguarded moment or when it might provide personal benefit.
Interesting, don't you think?
Now, it could be argued that it's completely unrealistic to expect anyone to truly be a White Hat, that nobody's perfect, and I suppose that's valid. What that little exercise and the ensuing discussion taught us however was that by setting a deliberate intention to be one and by endeavoring to be consciously aware of who we were being at all times and in all situations, we could at the very least become a much lighter shade of grey.
I know from personal experience that who we are and who we are becoming can be a conscious choice. This is so because we have, or can have, a tremendous amount of deliberate control over our thoughts. These thoughts then determine our attitude and outlook, which determine our words, actions, and responses to life situations. This in turn defines who we are and determines the color of hat we are seen to be wearing.
In any case, our White Hat - Black Hat discussion proved beneficial and helped us all view things just a little more from the perspective of the others on our team. It also taught us that others sometimes see us quite differently than we see ourselves.
In the ensuing years I have learned the value of three personally directed questions that I wish I had known of back then. I use them regularly now and will share them with you here in case you might benefit also.
Question 1: "What am I doing?" The purpose of this question is to make me consciously aware of what I'm doing, whether or not what I'm doing is consistent with White Hat behaviour, and whether or not it's a good use of my time and energy.
Question 2: "How am I doing it?" The purpose of this question is to make me aware of the quality of my investment of time and energy in whatever it is I'm doing at this moment. Am I doing the best I can or just going through the motions?
Question 3: "Who am I being while I'm doing this?" The purpose of this question is to cause me to reflect on who I am while I am doing what I'm doing. In other words, what is my attitude, outlook and intention as I'm doing what I'm doing?
At the end of the day we are each responsible for who we are and are becoming. Our life situations and the conditions in which we find ourselves do not define us, but our responses to them do. It's these that reflect the color of our hat to the world, whether it be white, black, or non-descript grey. Which colour hat do you wear Clark? To your success, Reg
WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE FOR YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE? You can as long as you include the following complete statement: SHARE WITH FRIENDS!...
WE VALUE YOUR FEEDBACK! ... Our intent for this F*R*E*E newsletter is that it be brief, informal and include articles, tips or suggestions to help you achieve the life success you desire ... and for each one to be of real value to you. Also included may be dates, times and locations of upcoming public venue programs. "Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world." ----- George Bernard Shaw "The virtue of man ought to be measured, not by his extraordinary exertions, but by his everyday conduct." ----- Blaise Pascal |
Comments(0)