You ARE like those you hang out with! Time to upgrade?

By
Education & Training with Advantage Solutions Group

It DOES Make a difference who you spend time with! You've heard me (and many others!) say "what you focus on expands". If you surround yourself news and people who give you more evidence of how tough it is...it's easy to buy into excuses for your own results. If you want to attract and create more to be positive, happy and grateful about ... your thinking and positive emotional state are the best tools you have to start with. Is it time to upgrade your Rolodex and your experiences? Have you outgrown some of the people you hang out with? Or are the folks to spend time with each day inspiring and encouraging?

In 2010, I am personally passionate about what I am calling Social PartneringTM. I'll be writing a series of articles over the next few months about how to use Social PartneringTM and offering ways for you to use the concept to be more successful this year! I am kicking this off here and there will be more on this month's free Fossland's Forum on building more referrals by building your social partner team.

From expansion of your strategic partners to participation with positive people or mastermind groups, I see the opportunity to the average agent to excel and the extraordinary agent to soar this year. With social media tools and Web 2.0, our ability to reach out and use our good relationship social capital to enhance the value we bring clients and customers is expanded in miraculous ways. That doesn't mean we won't bring the online offline-in fact, that's the point! A powerful combination of expanding your previous reach and adding the new is going to bring happiness to those who master the skill. Our relationships then bring value to us! And, I know many of you are very, very good at relationships...so you already are a leg up here!

And, this is really where it all starts. You know that your attitude is so important to your success and who you surround yourself with can make it easier or harder, right. Which do you want this year: easy or hard?


Jack Canfield, the author and motivational speaker, has shared a personal story. He had become very successful, using the principles he learned from Clement Stone and the teachings of Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, (this book is still available free here). He says he had grown his yearly income to $1,000,000 and it was stable and steady there. He set, however, a goal of $10,000,000 but his income stayed stuck at $1M. As he ruminated about why he was stuck, someone asked him what the average income was of those in his mastermind group. This was his "ah ha" moment as he realized they were all making $1M too! Now, not a bad a group that most of us could benefit from hanging out with, but not a fit for his expanded dreams.

Have you expanded your dreams and not matched new partners, friends and supporters to those NEW visions? Or have you given up and become resigned that you can have what you really want because of some outside influences, like the economy or some other personal excuse? There WERE people having their very best year ever last year! Were you in that group? If you were, hooray for you! If not, now is the time to decide what you really want in 2010. Old strategies will not get you there. It's a brave, new world. And one filled with opportunity! How amazingly fortunate we are to be living here in the United States with so many freedoms to create our lives.

Here are some other actions that will help:

  • Limit your exposure to the media and the "bad" news
  • Add some daily inspiring messages to your life.
  • Make a list of your 5 closest friends-do they reflect and support your dreams?
  • Find one or two new friends to hang out with some more that are inspiring
  • Buddy with someone who is as inspiring and committed as you want to be and become accountability partners
  • Form or join a mastermind group and meet regularly to support each other
  • Begin and end each day counting your blessings!

Put yourself in a place this year where you get the support and encouragement you need to stay focused, aligned and productive.

For 2010, take in less negative input and find the good every day and I promise you it would feel better. It may sound simple, but the best actions usually are. And, it is much easier if the people around you are aligned with the same thinking!

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Re-Blogged 4 times:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
  1. Carra & Shae Riley 02/03/2010 03:11 AM
  2. D B 02/03/2010 07:52 AM
  3. Roland Woodworth 02/03/2010 03:48 PM
  4. Toni Jones 02/03/2010 03:54 PM
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Rainer
21,526
Richard Glick
Kingsway Realty - Lancaster, PA

All this is true!  You tend to emulate the people surronding you, but is it really necessary to literally trade up friends when you have reached their level? 

There is more to life than monetary success, and life long relationships to me are a great part of life.  You should find inspiration where you can, but dont neglect the people who have been around for years.

Feb 04, 2010 02:53 AM #65
Rainer
21,526
Richard Glick
Kingsway Realty - Lancaster, PA

All this is true!  You tend to emulate the people surronding you, but is it really necessary to literally trade up friends when you have reached their level? 

There is more to life than monetary success, and life long relationships to me are a great part of life.  You should find inspiration where you can, but dont neglect the people who have been around for years.

Feb 04, 2010 02:53 AM #66
Rainer
36,308
Peter Di Eduardo
West End Residential - Morristown, NJ

I love your post; this reminds me of when I worked as a personal fitness trainer (and still do a little free-lance work;) People would ask me what the best method for getting in shape was and I would tell them to fire their friends and associate with those that were more health/fitness conscious.  Sometimes the company you keep can drag you down or propel you upward/forward.

Feb 04, 2010 03:16 AM #67
Rainer
63,430
James Lyon
Vista Pacific Realty - Sacramento, CA

This is a great post and so very true. It takes a look at our own life to really see this, thanks.

Feb 04, 2010 04:26 AM #68
Ambassador
1,398,833
Erica Ramus
Erica Ramus - Ramus Realty Group - Pottsville, PA - Pottsville, PA
MRE, Schuylkill County PA Real Estate

I love THINK AND GROW RICH. And you're right ... look at your friends, and I'll tell you who you are. Great advice

Feb 04, 2010 11:29 AM #69
Rainmaker
203,671
Ed Gillespie
Rocklin, CA

Thanks for this post Joeann! I might add that mentoring another could be a great way to "invest" in their success and remind us to stay humble.

Feb 04, 2010 11:57 AM #70
Rainer
294,908
Brian Morgenweck
Power Realty Group, LLC Bergen County, NJ - Hackensack, NJ
Broker/Owner, GRI, CRS, ABR, SRS

Thanks Joeann.

I think all of the famous "Mentors" have had the same basic message.

It's all about focus.

I'm shocked you didn't mention one of the 20th century's founding fathers in this realm of thought...

Earl Nightingale..."We Become What We Think About" A friend gave me a cassette tape of some of his recordings MANY moons ago & I played it 'till it disintegrated!

YouTube has many of his old black & white vids as well, for everyone's edification...FYI!

Hmmmm...Is this why they say you should always golf with people who are better than you?! ;)

All the best!

Brian Morgenweck, Broker/Owner

Power Realty Group, Hackensack, NJ

Feb 04, 2010 02:25 PM #72
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Cheryl Thanks for chiming in! And congrats on managing your input and attracting good sources of energy!

Jason Thanks! Life is good here! Hope it is in your world too!

Trevor! LOL You made me giggle...having in with those friends and helping them get to the otherside of it is part of what great agents do best! Bet your friends love you.

Ronald You make a good point about modeling for others and either they will follow or not. Life is evolution and sometimes we evolve in different directions, don't we?

Marci Thanks

Matt How lucky are you? My 8 year old granddaughter Lily is my favorite source of inspiration and perception!

Feb 04, 2010 10:37 PM #73
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Christopher and Stephanie! Thanks! Stay tuned! I'll be sharing more about expanding the ways you can do Social PartneringTM.....

Feb 04, 2010 10:41 PM #74
Rainer
93,887
Merrill Moss
HomeSmart Elite, Scottsdale AZ - Scottsdale, AZ
Scottsdale AZ Homes For Sale

Joeann -- Now you're talking! Your message is so important and I'm literally thrilled to see someone espousing these powerful ideas. Are you familiar with the work of Abraham-Hicks on the Law of Attraction? If not, may I suggest a quick Google search and exploration. GREAT POST!

Feb 05, 2010 02:10 AM #75
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Mike Long time no chat! Thanks for coming by. You are so right about needing to make sure that those you recommend have the same level of integrity that you do! And, unfortunately, sometimes we get disappointed when we thought we could count on someone and they aren't reliable!

Merrill I have loved the work of www.Abraham-hicks.com ! Have you read their newest book, The Vortex? Being reminded to let go where there is resistance sure makes life easier and more fun! Glad you have found them a good resource too!

Brian Earl Nightengale does have good work. Isn't it interesting how the basic tenets of success go back to some very foundational practices? And, I play tennis with my husband...he is better than me and likes to win and I like to be challenged...so it's a good fit!

Ed Good point about mentoring! Sharing positivity with others makes you feel even better, doesn't it?

Erica Thanks

James Thank you

Peter Yep! Works in every part of our lives, doesn't it. I know when I was using a fitness coach-she saw me capable of more than I saw myself and would encourage me to do more than I thought I could. I wouldn't have done it without her!

Feb 05, 2010 09:55 PM #76
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Richard I agree you don't want to neglect old friends...but you want to monitor what percentage of time you are spending with people that motivate you and what percent with people that don't!

Candice! You are so very cool! and it's a mutual admiration society! You have an attitude and energy that is delightful to experience. Just the kind of person I am talking about when I say motivating! Love the comment of just being the kind of person boring people don't gravitate to!

Jenna I am a great believer in the focusing on what we DO have and what we CAN do! Thanks for your thoughts

Frank I love the phrase "Garden of your mind" Thanks for your comments

Patricia Yep, sometimes people will upgrade their computers but not their friends!

Elliott I'm gonna go read your post and just hang in there about the comments and features...It will surprise you just when you least expect it. Are you a member of some groups too? A good way to send your message to just the right people!

Feb 06, 2010 03:47 AM #77
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Ruthmarie Thanks

Thor Thanks

Adrian The what you focus on expands is such a good place to look when things seems stuch! Thanks for coming by!

Mark Love the Groucho quote!!

Roland Thanks for coming by!

Lynn Sounds like you are positioning yourselves for a great 2010! Thanks for reading

Christine Yep, once you start to be conscious of it---you see the opportunities and the improvements! Good for you

Feb 07, 2010 02:38 AM #78
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Lisa Stafford there is nothing wrong with helping someone but don't get dragged into their drama!

Nevin  Thanks and cool it is! Thanks for rubbing shoulders with me!

Paul I agree. Our thoughts become things...according to Michael Dooley---so don't put attention on what you DON'T want!

Lisa Schmidt  Thanks fo reading and commenting!

Athina I don't believe inburning bridges either! Thanks for your message

Feb 07, 2010 11:02 PM #79
Rainmaker
334,002
Ty Lacroix
Envelope Real Estate Brokerage Inc - London, ON

Joeanne:

What a great post and I really liked when Jack got his aha moment when he he was stuck at 1 million in earnings!

Ty

Feb 10, 2010 08:49 AM #80
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Ty It's a rough life, huh?

Paul I believe in being of service too! Thans for the thoughtful comments!

Heather Smart Dad and sounds like he raised a smart gal!

Elizabeth...Guess we aren't all that different from the computer model of Garbage in>Garbage out!

Brian & Chris Thanks for you comments!

Steve You bring up a god point about the difficulty in maintaining social partnerships...it is s important to mke sure those you aign yourself with have the same ales and level of integrity that you do...or you can do yourself more harm than good!

 

Feb 12, 2010 12:39 AM #81
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Paula I so agree! It is easy to get pulled out of positive thinking! We just have to be aware of continually finding good resources to empower us rather than letting the things and people that disempower us affect us!

Missy You've hit the nail on the head...the basics of what works are really tried and true principles and we just need to remember and employ them!

Annie and Norma Thanks for subscribing to my blog. I'd also love it if you'd join me on Facebook: www.facebook.com/CoachJoeann

Feb 12, 2010 12:47 AM #82
Rainmaker
59,596
Becky Schertenleib, Nan Wimmers
Columbia Gorge Real Estate - The Dalles, OR
"sisters by chance, partners by choice"

Joeann you are so very true! we choose every morning to make it a great day, nan

Feb 15, 2010 07:04 AM #83
Rainmaker
314,055
Joeann Fossland
Advantage Solutions Group - Tucson, AZ
Master Certified Coach to Motivated Agents

Nan Choosing that in the morning sure sets the tone for a great day!!! Smart ladies, I'd say

Feb 15, 2010 08:12 AM #84
Ambassador
411,765
Emily Medvec Qualifying Broker
Hello Realty Partners - Santa Fe, NM
Realtor | Serving Santa Fe & Northern NM

I believe we have the life and work we create with our energy, intentions, attitude and choices. Your reminders and strategies are key actions to pivot into new directions and opportunities. Real estate is challenging and adding more negative spin or energy only blocks action like a kink in the garden hose. Know you're one of my social partners!

Mar 30, 2010 06:23 AM #85
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